Relax, this isn’t about Harvey Weinstein. I’ve already dealt with him here.

But since he’s still the Outrage du Jour, I commented on a Facebook thread about him by saying, “Why don’t these fat pigs just pay prostitutes instead of going around ruining people’s lives?” It was a rhetorical question but someone came back at me with something like, “Why do you want sex-workers to be mistreated? And what does body size have to do with this?”

Jesus! I will leave it to you to evaluate the self-righteous absurdity of that response.

I now realize that I will never, ever, be able to keep up with progressives. This makes me sad. Have they just gone too far or is it an age thing? Maybe I’m too old to learn the new rules. I think I even call my mailman “the mailman” instead of “the mail-carrier.”

I certainly think that Weinstein is a fat pig. So many predators and bullies are fat pigs! Here’s a collage that Max made for me, for a post I wrote in 2009.

I don’t see why we have to worry about fat-shaming our cultural villains, if they’re fat. We need to have some leeway with language or we won’t be able to speak at all. We old people especially have trouble with retrieving words and we shouldn’t be penalized for calling prostitutes prostitutes, for example.

Words are still a joy for me, even though they are evaporating from my memory bank in huge quantities. Today, when Obama staffer Alyssa Mastromonaco called Donald Trump a deranged animal, I felt a spark of joy, literally. I could feel my neural synapses light up and go ping.

Good call! I thought. And later, back to Facebook, I couldn’t stop laughing when a friend wrote:

My favorite pants right now are Eileen Fisher. Who even am I?

As long as I can still use and enjoy words, I will probably be able to put up with everything, including Harvey Weinstein. I’m just hoping we can quickly move on to the question of why that beautiful Marchesa woman married him, even if it’s gold-digger shaming.

One thing we learned from the debate on Monday night is that Donald Trump has a thing about fat.

I know his feud with Rosie O’Donnell involved taunts about her weight, but I didn’t realize that fat-shaming is a familiar behavior of Donald’s, verging on an obsession.

In Trump’s value system, being fat is the worst crime a woman can commit. Slobs! Ugly pigs!

He has double-downed today on the fat Miss Universe story. Not only was she a fat pig, she was “the worst [Miss Universe] we ever had. She gained a massive amount of weight, and it was a real problem.” She was “an eating machine!”

Here’s what fat pig Alicia Machado looked like at age 20, when he invited a film crew to watch her working out in a gym.

Machado’s story about being traumatized by Trump’s insults brings to mind a common trigger of anorexia and bulimia: fat-shaming by the father, often in the form of a single, brutal comment.

A former Trump employee recalls that he used to keep an unflattering “fat photo” of her in his desk.  He would pull it out whenever she did something “wrong.”

I can’t even can’t even on this misogynist shit. Clearly, Trump has a deep fear and loathing of women, whose womanly bodies offend him. You can never get thin enough for men like this.

Let’s move on to his imaginary “400 pound” hacker, cited in his argument against Russia being responsible for breaking into the DMC’s files.

Who is this 400 pounder? Is Trump haunted by visions of fat people laying around in basements or running for Miss Universe? Does he see fat people hiding under every bed, like communists?

I’m wondering if he sees that fat guy in the mirror.

I think Donald Trump is a fat pig, and not because I hate men. I see an obese guy in an ill-fitting suit with a stupid wrestler-style pompadour. He looks like a pig because of his bloated face and little slit eyes. He embodies what we mean when we think a  person acts like a pig. No manners, no dignity, no civility, no self-respect.

Now I’m wondering if he likes to keep Chris Christie around just to look thinner by comparison.

I hope every woman who has ever felt fat because some man disparaged her body will make sure to vote Donald Trump off the island and off our planet.

He hates us because mommy didn’t protect him from daddy or because he can’t admit he’s gay or you know, a projection of self-disgust. Whatever.

He’d be a fat pig at any weight.

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California State Senator Roy Ashburn (R) seemed like too much of a no-brainer for Cunt of the Week , but then I thought, “If it walks like a cunt and it quacks like a cunt….”

The man is a cunt, pure and simple. With a staunch anti-gay rights voting record, Ashburn has come out as gay, only after being arrested for DUI upon leaving a popular gay nightspot in Sacramento.

Ashburn has voted against a number of gay rights measures, including efforts to expand anti-discrimination laws and recognize out-of-state gay marriages. Last year, he opposed a bill to establish a day of recognition to honor slain gay rights activist Harvey Milk.

Equality California, a group that advocates for expanded gay rights and other issues, has consistently given Ashburn a zero rating on its scorecard.

Today, Ashburn’s statement is typically self-dramatizing and hypocritical:

“I am gay … those are the words that have been so difficult for me for so long.” (Awwww, boo hoo!) “The best way to handle that is to be truthful and to say to my constituents and all who care that I am gay. But I don’t think it’s something that has affected, nor will it affect, how I do my job.”

Here’s what bothers me the most. In his radio interview, Ashburn said he is drawing on his Christian faith, and he asked people to pray for him.

PRAY FOR WHAT, you fucking cunt?!? That god forgives you for being gay? That he turns you into a heterosexual? Or that people don’t view you as a fat sanctimonious liar?

Imagine if I voted for all kinds of anti-Semitic legislation and then asked for people to forgive me because I was afraid to admit I was Jewish? Would I deserve sympathy, or would I be a Cunt of the Week ?

I rest my case. Congratulations, Sen. Roy Ashburn!

I have hated this fat pig for so long that it’s hard to believe his stupid sneering face will no longer blight my life when I’m stretched out on my couch like a beached whale, waiting for some Anderson Cooper on CNN.

I used to find him amusing, but that ended a long time ago. Watching him gain traction or whatever they call it over the last year has been too infuriating to stomach. I hate this fucker more than anyone on TV, and that is truly saying something.

I didn’t even know he graduated from Harvard until today. I will never again assume that a Harvard graduate has a high IQ.   Read about some of his most egregious bullshit here, if you’re not already a card-carrying Lou Dobbs Hater.

Lou, here is a memo: Take your fat dimpled pigface far, far away and have your nervous breakdown in private where it belongs, you racist moron. Andale!

Just look at these pigs guys!   The question is, did their right-wing politics turn them into pigs, or did their pigfaces drive them to right-wing politics? (Click on the picture for the full horror.)

This Pigfest was designed by Max, who has taught me the joy of watching Hannity on Fox TV. It’s a nice diversion from Lou Dobbs, whose show I can no longer tolerate, and who seems very close to a nervous breakdown.

Did we leave anyone out? Let me know.

In other Wolf news, the Younger has posted a new video here. How many Wolves can you spot in the audience?

Breaking news: Jessica Simpson is a fat pig and it’s mean to make fun of her. In fact, if you make fun of her, you are part of the problem. It’s people like you who are forcing girls to starve themselves, you big meanies!

Jessica Simpson can’t help being a fat pig, duh. She is only human, or so it seems. Her sister used to have a really big nose, but now she’s fixed it, and she’s hopping mad about Jessica’s detractors. Heidi Klum is mad, too. Heidi is very slim, even after eight million children, but she will not stand for any criticism of Jessica’s weight.

Jessica Simpson is fat now and it’s everybody’s fault. You laughed at her fashion blunders, you sneered at her awful enormous handbags, you mocked her for her line of shoes and hair-pieces, and now look what’s happened! Even President Obama noticed her weight problem. He’ll probably propose some legislation to stop her from gaining more weight. John McCain will oppose it, though.

If I were Jessica Simpson, I’d either kill myself just to show how hurt I was, or I’d pack on another fifty pounds in order to make everyone feel bad for calling me fat.

Either way, it just goes to show how petty and small-minded we are as a society. I plan to go to church tomorrow to pray for Jessica Simpson. May she find solace in big earrings and wide belts and a double order of crispy fried chicken.