I received a price-list in the mail for a new waxing salon in my neighborhood. As a child of the sixties, I am innocent of the ins and outs of waxing. All I know is that is hurts and I don’t want any.

But this price-list is so captivating! I had to read some of it aloud, just to savor the language.

‘Buttocks strip’ struck me as the funniest, most poignant words I had ever read. It evokes so much…

But then, I noticed ‘Buttocks strip touch-up.’ Hmm.

I also noticed that men are charged more than woman, even for knee waxing. Would anyone actually go to have just their knees waxed? Why? I challenge anyone to explain this.

I love this fucking price-list. It is poetry. It came from ‘Uni K Wax Center’ and you can like them on facebook.

Crystal Renn posed nude in the May issue of French Vogue, and the sight of her public hair has been too much for some people. The comments at The Cut are filled with revulsion for Crystal’s crotch.

Whether the photos are flattering or appropriate or anything else, my interest is in the reactions. What the hell is wrong with people? Those who object to the pubic hair insist that their aesthetic hasn’t been formed by porn. They talk about how nice it is to be “clean down there.”

What isn’t clean about natural hair? It seems very anti-woman to insist on a waxed crotch.   The hair is a sign of adulthood – it’s what separates a woman’s body from a child’s.

I admit I don’t watch porn. It make me too sad. But I’m aware there’s a fatwa on body hair these days. It seems creepy and it seems babyish. It’s as if the very idea of pubic hair is terrifying.

It depresses me to confront the fact that women have yet another reason to feel shame about their bodies. I’m glad that Crystal Renn is breaking barriers, if that’s what she’s doing. If she reads those comments, though, she may feel she’s committed a federal crime by looking like a natural woman.

Opinions, anyone?

My associate Dr. Larue alerted me to an article in the New York Post about moms bringing in their pre-teen daughters to get waxed.   He knew it would upset me. Not that it takes a village to upset me.   One spa owner believes it’s good for girls to start young and suggests that in ten years, “waxing children will be like taking them to the dentist or putting braces on their teeth.”

Another advocate for early waxing is Nair, whose hair removing line called ‘Nair Pretty‘ is clearly aimed at kids. Check out the kid in their ad.

Childhood will soon be no place for children.   These developments are not good news for Lourdes. Let’s hope Madonna doesn’t read the New York Post.

In a more appealing direction, men’s underwear companies are reaching out to men who want a little oomph in their pants.   Men, you work hard, you play hard; why not LOOK hard?   The brand C in 2 makes some nice briefs that are designed with ‘Trophy Shelves’, “which enhances a man’s assets with incomparable support.”   Compare the Trophy brief with the standard D & G brief.

If women need to wax, they should fucking well expect a Trophy in return, don’t you think?