A thoughtful reader named “A” had an uncanny hunch that I would appreciate a blogger who I’ve just named The Thigh Girl.  I don’t know what her deal is, but it doesn’t take a rocket surgeon to see that she LOVES her thighs.

She has every reason to love her thighs. They are shapely and firm looking, and free of unsightly hair. But what does she want from us, a Thigh Award? In every outfit post, she offers at least 10 photos of the same outfit,  with little variation in her facial expression, which I will have to call Pensive.

I can’t bring my self to read her commentary about her outfits but I did click on her “about” thing. She tells us in no uncertain terms that her hair is naturally red, godammit, and she’s never died it. Take that! Wait, maybe she’s speaking directly to Sea!!!!!

In any case, it is a thigh-driven blog and as such might be just the thing for people who are sick and tired of Roomi.

Several people have taken it upon themselves to chide me for stooping to mockery in my time of grief. They can complain all they want, but I need to keep my mind from wandering to a place of bottomless despair. I will stay in denial as long as possible. Maybe longer.

If you know any stupid whores with blogs, now is a good time to share them with me! THX

Here is the truth: Tonight, I just hate everything. Not so much hate, just don’t give a shit.

I want to be interested in something but nothing worked. I don’t give a shit about who wore what to the Met Gala. I certainly don’t give a shit about Lady Gaga or the Sex and the City movie. I’m too depressed by World Events to dwell upon them. I looked at fashion and felt that it’s being covered better elsewhere. I looked for new Whores With Blogs  and discovered that Roomy has lost her bloom and the What Is Reality girl just flounces around with the Jizz Girls.   It has all become so incestuous, lately!

A bunch of Second Tier Whores With Blogs  have posted the usual mood boards and photos of Daul (“RIP!”,) Kate Moss, anyone who is blond and holding a cigarette. They’re all boasting about some stupid wedge heeled boots by Jeffrey Campbell or Sam Edelman ( I TOLD you they are Second Tier; they can’t afford Rick Owens or even Acne.)

The girl at Luxnoir is still chunky and in love with herself. The Dirty Flaws girl shows a photo of a weird chain gag in someone’s mouth with the title “Yes, Please!” I get that she’s Dirty but why do these girls need to work so hard to emphasize their Darkness? Why can’t they just get their entire bodies pierced and covered with cigarette burns and Sanskrit tattoos and get it over with? Gnarlitude is still Stoked by all the radness and Fuck Yeah-ing over everything.

Since I’ve wasted all this time, Let me introduce the Model/Whore above, who really really loves herself and seems like reason enough for Roomy to either blow her brains out or find a new direction entirely.

Sorry. I failed. Maybe tomorrow.