{"id":12947,"date":"2018-05-27T22:37:10","date_gmt":"2018-05-28T05:37:10","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/godammit.com\/?p=12947"},"modified":"2018-05-27T22:37:10","modified_gmt":"2018-05-28T05:37:10","slug":"what-is-wrong-with-people","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/godammit.com\/what-is-wrong-with-people\/","title":{"rendered":"What is Wrong With People?"},"content":{"rendered":"

A woman who seemed to share my sensibility started to chat with me there. I told her that I’m a grieving mother, as I consider this to be a significant part of my identity. So anyway, in order to soften the blow of this, I added that I have some pretend adopted children, (Chris, Ali, and Simone, xoxo)<\/p>\n

$\"what$ <\/a><\/p>\n

She went on to elaborate on how well the adoption has turned put and how nice the person was to “open her house to an orphan.”<\/p>\n

I was so disconcerted that I continued to chat with her about this and that. I hate when I do this. I need to get better at going, ARE YOU CRAZY?<\/em> But anyway, let me ask you:<\/p>\n

WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH PEOPLE????<\/strong><\/p>\n

Why do people say such awful things?? “Because they’re uncomfortable” isn’t good enough. Can you imagine if someone’s cat died, coming back with, Oh, a friend of mine had a cat that was torn to pieces by a coyote! No, you can’t imagine, because you’re just not that awful.<\/p>\n

One of my loved ones was diagnosed with cancer, and is now cancer free and in great shape. But when they told people about the diagnosis, they were often caught off-guard by the stupidest and cruelest responses. I can’t repeat them here. But the correct reply is not “My grandma just died of\u00a0 cancer!”<\/p>\n

If someone confides in you, regarding some misfortune, it’s not hard to just say, “I’m so sorry. Are you doing okay?” <\/strong>I find myself saying this fairly often, since bad things keep happening to friends and complete strangers. Please, please try this next time you are lost for words.<\/p>\n

Next up is the non-compliment. A friend told me today that when she tried on some new sparkly eye shadow, her husband noticed and asked her, “What have you done to your eyes?” I laughed at the hostility of this response, partly because I know her husband and it’s a perfect summation of his personality.<\/p>\n

I think it’s a good rule to not comment on anyone’s physicality UNLESS THEY ASK YOU TO WEIGH IN! Don’t say anything about my shoes if it’s not a compliment. Don’t call anything I’m wearing “fun.” I know what fun means, motherfuckers! Don’t say to people, “Is your hair different?” If their hair looks great, you can say so, but otherwise, just shut up. Never, ever, say to anyone “If you like it, that’s what matters!” under any circumstances.<\/p>\n

There are so many expressions that strike me as inherently out of order, like when I was stroking my husband in my sleep and he muttered, Keep still. “Keep still” is what my dentist used to say when I was six years old and terrified. “Keep still” is what someone says when they’re lasering your eyeball or operating on your brain or getting ready to shoot you.<\/p>\n

Thoughts? What do people say that bothers you or makes you wonder what the fuck is wrong with them?<\/p>\n

<\/p>\n

<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"