{"id":1960,"date":"2009-05-12T23:04:29","date_gmt":"2009-05-13T07:04:29","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.godammit.com\/?p=1960"},"modified":"2009-05-12T23:04:29","modified_gmt":"2009-05-13T07:04:29","slug":"mrs-ps-book-deal","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/godammit.com\/mrs-ps-book-deal\/","title":{"rendered":"Mrs. P’s Book Deal"},"content":{"rendered":"

It stands to reason that a fucking moron with no facility for the English language would be offered several million dollars to write a book.<\/p>\n

Robert Barnett, the attorney who brokered the deal with HarperCollins, is also quite the linguist. He says: “Every word of the book will be her words.<\/strong>” \u00a0 He certainly seems qualified to helps her, doesn’t him?<\/p>\n

Ah, Mrs. P. Just when I’ve decided it’s time for me to write a book, you go and piss me off again. \u00a0 I know you have more of a story to tell, but still, you are incapable of telling it. \u00a0 Also too, you will just use all that money to advance your awful agenda. Neiman Marcus, look out!<\/p>\n

Will the book be a best seller? Does Todd Palin shit in the woods? It will be massive. We will see her face on every TV screen, once again, and in our dreams. There will be no escape.<\/p>\n

Some blogger in their pajamas in their parents’ basement will have to calculate how much money she gets paid per lie. I’m really creeping myself out here.<\/p>\n

I wanted to call my life story “Ordeal,” but Linda Lovelace stole that title years ago. What will Mrs. P call her memoir? We should start working on this, in case she asks for suggestions! \u00a0 Let’s listen to her discuss<\/a> her exciting project:<\/p>\n

“Being a voracious reader, I read a lot today and have read a lot growing up. And having that journalism degree, all of that, will be a great assistance for me in writing this book, talking about the challenges and the joys, balancing the work and parenting, and, in my case, work means running the state.<\/strong>“<\/p>\n

“I’ve read a variety of books, and that helps shape my opinions and my views.<\/strong>“<\/p>\n

Well, I’m sold.<\/p>\n

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