{"id":2274,"date":"2009-06-14T00:26:00","date_gmt":"2009-06-14T08:26:00","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.godammit.com\/?p=2274"},"modified":"2009-06-14T00:26:00","modified_gmt":"2009-06-14T08:26:00","slug":"a-bad-hair-day","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/godammit.com\/a-bad-hair-day\/","title":{"rendered":"A Bad Hair Day"},"content":{"rendered":"

$\"charlie-le-mindu-hair1\"$ <\/a><\/p>\n

When I’m not happy with my hair, nothing else matters. I am acutely fixated on the not-goodness of my hair. I tried lightening it to a brown color, forgetting how stubborn my hair is about staying black. It is now a patchy brown and black with gold streaks. It is dry and dull looking. Hair hair hair hair hair hair hair hair.<\/p>\n

My husband says I’m just tripping, my hair looks fine. Today I saw my brother-in-law who observed: “I like your hair better black!” before I even had time to register my hair complaint.<\/p>\n

$\"freudian-kicks-image\"$ <\/a><\/p>\n

Nothing I do will ever restore my hair to its former state. I have made a blunder of unfathomable proportions. No one will ever love me again. I am shit. I am less than shit, I am the shit with bad hair. I am a Greek tragedy, taken down by my own vanity like Narcissus<\/a>. The gods are laughing about my hair. They’re going, “Haha, look what that stupid bitch did to her hair! She asked for it!”<\/p>\n

$\"charlie-le-mindu-curly\"$ <\/a><\/p>\n

I will spend a fortune that I don’t even have on hair conditioners that promise impossible results. I will scrutinize my hair for signs of breakage. I will hate every woman with shiny hair. (WendyB<\/a>, put on a turban!) I will be humbled by the bald heads of courageous chemo-therapy patients. Then I will return to feeling bad about my awful brownish hair.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"