{"id":2991,"date":"2009-08-22T02:03:16","date_gmt":"2009-08-22T10:03:16","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.godammit.com\/?p=2991"},"modified":"2009-08-22T02:03:16","modified_gmt":"2009-08-22T10:03:16","slug":"some-valuable-advice","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/godammit.com\/some-valuable-advice\/","title":{"rendered":"Some Valuable Advice"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><a href=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.godammit.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2009\/08\/viking-hat2.jpg\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignnone size-medium wp-image-2992\" title=\"viking-hat2\" src=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.godammit.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2009\/08\/viking-hat2-300x235.jpg?resize=300%2C235\" alt=\"viking-hat2\" width=\"300\" height=\"235\" srcset=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/godammit.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2009\/08\/viking-hat2.jpg?resize=300%2C235&amp;ssl=1 300w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/godammit.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2009\/08\/viking-hat2.jpg?w=590&amp;ssl=1 590w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 300px) 100vw, 300px\" data-recalc-dims=\"1\" \/><\/a><\/p>\n<p>Let&#8217;s say your teenager acquires a huge wooden plaque adorned with enormous animal horns. And he decides, &#8220;These horns would make a great Viking hat.&#8221; Then, he goes to an army surplus store and explains why he needs a helmet. Then he borrows an electric saw from the nice new neighbors.<\/p>\n<p>You&#8217;re thinking, Jesus Christ, this will never work, why can&#8217;t he see that?!&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>The thing to do is stand back and let fate take over. They&#8217;re going to do what they&#8217;re going to do, and it might end up with a gigantic Viking helmet.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Let&#8217;s say your teenager acquires a huge wooden plaque adorned with enormous animal horns. And he decides, &#8220;These horns would make a great Viking hat.&#8221; Then, he goes to an army surplus store and explains why he needs a helmet. &hellip; <a href=\"https:\/\/godammit.com\/some-valuable-advice\/\">Continue reading <span class=\"meta-nav\">&rarr;<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","enabled":false}}},"categories":[12],"tags":[689,147,688],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p7t44M-Mf","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/godammit.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2991"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/godammit.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/godammit.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/godammit.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/godammit.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=2991"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/godammit.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2991\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/godammit.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=2991"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/godammit.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=2991"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/godammit.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=2991"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}