{"id":5757,"date":"2010-09-04T21:48:39","date_gmt":"2010-09-05T05:48:39","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.godammit.com\/?p=5757"},"modified":"2010-09-04T23:25:53","modified_gmt":"2010-09-05T07:25:53","slug":"chrissie-hynde-no","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/godammit.com\/chrissie-hynde-no\/","title":{"rendered":"Chrissie Hynde, No!"},"content":{"rendered":"

I was up late watching TV with my husband when I learned that Chrissie Hynde<\/strong><\/a> has formed a new band. \u00a0 To my horror, she was playing second fiddle, so to speak, to her new beloved, JP Jones<\/strong>, an annoying Welshman half her age.<\/p>\n

In case anyone failed to notice the age difference, she warbles it in the song “Perfect Lover.” (I found my perfect lover, but he’s only half my age…<\/em>) In fact, she and this guy have released an entire album of songs about their doomed relationship. Evidently, Jones wants to raise a family and at 58, Chrissie has hung up her childbearing spurs.<\/p>\n

My husband brought home the new CD the other day, and our son asked about it. I explained, “It’s Chrissie Hynde and some douche in a hat.” My husband begged to differ, in a sharp tone. He had seen them perform that afternoon and Chrissie had autographed his CD.<\/p>\n

Still, it’s awful. Not just awful, but so awful that I longed to jump out of the car when we had to listen to it on a ninety minute road trip. All the songs are “nakedly” autobiographical, with lyrics like “I’m old, you’re not” ” you surprised me in the bar when I decided to take you home.” It’s like reading the diary of someone you admire and finding a bunch of LOL’s and smiley face thingies.<\/p>\n

Poor Chrissie. She is so besotted with this douche that she’s lost all judgment. These songs prove beyond a doubt that a little ambiguity is vital where pop songs are concerned, unless you’re a poet like Hank Williams Sr. It was so embarrassing to listen to this shit, I had to cover my face to endure it.<\/p>\n

Patti Smith<\/strong> got herself a cute young guy and let him play in her band, in the background. Not only that, he was a babe. Chrissie, call Patti to find out how it’s done, before that douche empties your bank account!<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"