{"id":7219,"date":"2011-03-03T23:05:42","date_gmt":"2011-03-04T07:05:42","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.godammit.com\/?p=7219"},"modified":"2011-03-03T23:05:42","modified_gmt":"2011-03-04T07:05:42","slug":"keep-on-sagging","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/godammit.com\/keep-on-sagging\/","title":{"rendered":"Keep on Sagging!"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><a href=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.godammit.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/03\/Carine-is-nice-and-old-now.jpg\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignnone size-full wp-image-7228\" title=\"Carine is nice and old now\" src=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.godammit.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/03\/Carine-is-nice-and-old-now.jpg?resize=287%2C327\" alt=\"\" width=\"287\" height=\"327\" srcset=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/godammit.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/03\/Carine-is-nice-and-old-now.jpg?w=287&amp;ssl=1 287w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/godammit.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/03\/Carine-is-nice-and-old-now.jpg?resize=263%2C300&amp;ssl=1 263w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 287px) 100vw, 287px\" data-recalc-dims=\"1\" \/><\/a><\/p>\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.godammit.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/03\/Madge-making-me-happy.jpg\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignnone size-full wp-image-7222\" title=\"Madge making me happy!\" src=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.godammit.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/03\/Madge-making-me-happy.jpg?resize=468%2C286\" alt=\"\" width=\"468\" height=\"286\" data-recalc-dims=\"1\" \/><\/a><\/p>\n<p>It&#8217;s easy not to care about looking old when you&#8217;re not old.<\/p>\n<p>Later, it&#8217;s just a constant struggle to accept the changes in your face, the face that in your mind is eternally 18 or 30 or whenever you liked it best.<\/p>\n<p>Seeing Carine and Madonna look like women in their 50&#8217;s is such a comfort! Get old, you two!<\/p>\n<p>I decided to see the difference between a face in repose and a face smiling.<\/p>\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.godammit.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/03\/big-smile-w-wrinkles.jpg\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignnone size-full wp-image-7231\" title=\"big smile w wrinkles\" src=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.godammit.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/03\/big-smile-w-wrinkles.jpg?resize=466%2C392\" alt=\"\" width=\"466\" height=\"392\" srcset=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/godammit.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/03\/big-smile-w-wrinkles.jpg?w=466&amp;ssl=1 466w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/godammit.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/03\/big-smile-w-wrinkles.jpg?resize=300%2C252&amp;ssl=1 300w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 466px) 100vw, 466px\" data-recalc-dims=\"1\" \/><\/a><\/p>\n<p>I made the biggest smile my face could do, and voila! I&#8217;m genuinely old.<\/p>\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.godammit.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/03\/blank-expression.jpg\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignnone size-full wp-image-7238\" title=\"blank expression\" src=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.godammit.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/03\/blank-expression.jpg?resize=350%2C392\" alt=\"\" width=\"350\" height=\"392\" srcset=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/godammit.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/03\/blank-expression.jpg?w=350&amp;ssl=1 350w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/godammit.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/03\/blank-expression.jpg?resize=267%2C300&amp;ssl=1 267w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 350px) 100vw, 350px\" data-recalc-dims=\"1\" \/><\/a><\/p>\n<p>If&nbsp;\u00a0 you have no expression, you can keep up the illusion of youthfulness.<\/p>\n<p>I am unable to age gracefully because I&#8217;m too shallow and preoccupied with appearance. I want everyone to wrinkle up like a prune. The only procedure I would rule out if I were a millionaire is the lip enhancement, because nothing says tragedy like a duckface.<\/p>\n<p>I am waiting patiently for Demi Moore&#8217;s face to fall. On the day it does, the drinks are on me!<\/p>\n<p>How do feel you will handle getting old? If you are old, how hard is it for you to combat vanity?<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>It&#8217;s easy not to care about looking old when you&#8217;re not old. Later, it&#8217;s just a constant struggle to accept the changes in your face, the face that in your mind is eternally 18 or 30 or whenever you liked &hellip; <a href=\"https:\/\/godammit.com\/keep-on-sagging\/\">Continue reading <span class=\"meta-nav\">&rarr;<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","enabled":false}}},"categories":[4,7],"tags":[953,849,163],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p7t44M-1Sr","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/godammit.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/7219"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/godammit.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/godammit.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/godammit.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/godammit.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=7219"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/godammit.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/7219\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/godammit.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=7219"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/godammit.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=7219"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/godammit.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=7219"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}