{"id":759,"date":"2008-03-07T21:48:52","date_gmt":"2008-03-08T05:48:52","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.godammit.com\/2008\/03\/07\/pastor-melissa-scott-holy-christ\/"},"modified":"2013-08-17T01:17:59","modified_gmt":"2013-08-17T09:17:59","slug":"pastor-melissa-scott-holy-christ","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/godammit.com\/pastor-melissa-scott-holy-christ\/","title":{"rendered":"Pastor Melissa Scott: Holy Christ!"},"content":{"rendered":"

Pastor Melissa Scott<\/a> is the third and final wife of the loony Rev. Gene Scott, who had once hired her as a hot young babe to sit in the front row of his TV audience. Anyway, he\u2019s dead and Melissa took over his, ahem, ministry.<\/p>\n

She has a waist-length mane of hair that she likes to flip over her shoulder, and her heavy make-up says actress\/stripper, in contrast to her bizarre black frock-coat and heavy men\u2019s shoes. She paces back and forth in front of a white board scribbled with weird foreign words. Her hand motions suggest a background in mime or hula dancing. It\u2019s hard to take your eyes off the hands, but given the rest of her, one manages the task.<\/p>\n

Pastor Melissa\u2019s accent is hard to pin down and her diction is particularly odd. Her attitude runs the gamut from mildly annoyed to manic and wrathful.<\/p>\n

I fucking love her. I remarked to my husband about midway through her show, \u201cI\u2019d like to know what this woman was in her former life.\u201d That\u2019s when he googled<\/a> her and learned that she was once a porn star and enterpreneur.<\/p>\n

My hope is to one day attend her Sunday service in downtown Los Angeles. I want to ask her about those shoes, which look like they might be my size, a full and lovely 10 narrow.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"