{"id":8325,"date":"2011-12-19T03:02:15","date_gmt":"2011-12-19T11:02:15","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.godammit.com\/?p=8325"},"modified":"2011-12-19T03:02:15","modified_gmt":"2011-12-19T11:02:15","slug":"ickiest-stupidest-ad-ever","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/godammit.com\/ickiest-stupidest-ad-ever\/","title":{"rendered":"Ickiest, Stupidest Ad Ever"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><a href=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.godammit.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/12\/Masque.jpg\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignnone size-medium wp-image-8326\" title=\"Masque\" src=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.godammit.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/12\/Masque-255x300.jpg?resize=255%2C300\" alt=\"\" width=\"255\" height=\"300\" srcset=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/godammit.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/12\/Masque.jpg?resize=255%2C300&amp;ssl=1 255w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/godammit.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/12\/Masque.jpg?w=365&amp;ssl=1 365w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 255px) 100vw, 255px\" data-recalc-dims=\"1\" \/><\/a><\/p>\n<p>I came across this ad in <strong>Marie Claire<\/strong> a few days ago, and couldn&#8217;t believe it wasn&#8217;t a joke. &#8220;Masque&#8221; is a new product for women who would enjoy performing oral sex if only it tasted like chocolate or watermelon.<\/p>\n<p>I think it&#8217;s a little strip that dissolves in your mouth like a breath-freshener thingie. The only time I tried one of those mouthwash strips, &nbsp;\u00a0I nearly choked to death, trying to spit it out.<\/p>\n<p>Anyway, the ad&#8217;s tagline is beyond sickening: &#8220;Expect flowers tomorrow&#8221; it promises suggestively, showing a happy couple who have evidently managed the tricky completion of oral sex. Their expressions are ridiculous, much like the product itself.<\/p>\n<p>Who are these fucking people who need to &#8220;Masque&#8221; the taste of sex and then expect flowers?!?<\/p>\n<p>Ladies, if your man pulled out a &#8220;Masque&#8221; strip before doing his job, wouldn&#8217;t you just snarl, &#8220;Don&#8217;t bother?&#8221; &nbsp;\u00a0I guess men are&nbsp;\u00a0supposed&nbsp;\u00a0to be so desperate that they&#8217;d send flowers.<\/p>\n<p>This ad and the mentality it reflects is pathetic and gross and makes me want to kill everyone involved.<\/p>\n<p>Thoughts?<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>I came across this ad in Marie Claire a few days ago, and couldn&#8217;t believe it wasn&#8217;t a joke. &#8220;Masque&#8221; is a new product for women who would enjoy performing oral sex if only it tasted like chocolate or watermelon. &hellip; <a href=\"https:\/\/godammit.com\/ickiest-stupidest-ad-ever\/\">Continue reading <span class=\"meta-nav\">&rarr;<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","enabled":false}}},"categories":[9,7],"tags":[340,836],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p7t44M-2ah","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/godammit.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/8325"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/godammit.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/godammit.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/godammit.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/godammit.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=8325"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/godammit.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/8325\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/godammit.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=8325"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/godammit.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=8325"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/godammit.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=8325"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}