The poor boy who jumped off a bridge has captured the public imagination, and it’s easy to see why. For me, it has triggered symptoms of PTSD that are never far from the surface at the best of times.

The one thing that no one wants to address is the use of this boy’s death for political purposes.

A young man who so dreaded being outed to his family that he chose death instead, would NEVER want to become the poster boy for gay suicide. He clearly wasn’t ready to self-identify as gay. Never mind the ordeal for his family, seeing their dead son’s photo plastered everywhere as a symbol of martyrdom.

The GLBT community is understandably shaken, and sincere in its outrage at this boy’s death. But no one cares that the family has asked for privacy. No one cares what the boy would want to be remembered for. If it draws attention to societal prejudice and helps to implement change, then tough shit for the kid and his family.

Poor unwilling martyr! My heart aches for him. It aches for every kid who is bullied about being different. For every person who views their depression as a life sentence.   For every son or daughter or mother or father who somehow lost that thread of connectedness that keeps us in this world to fight on for another day.

I just wish we could address a social problem without putting a face on it.

Remember when Lady Gaga said that on live TV? I thought it sounded insulting, until one of my own gays explained that she used the words ironically.

Watching Anderson Cooper reporting from Haiti tonight, I was struck anew by his charisma, courage, and palpable warmth. He manages to convey such genuine emotion without sacrificing professionalism. He is the essence of calm and confidence. He is hunky in a tight black t-shirt. And all the time, he’s as gay as the day is long!

I want Andy to come out. I know, I know, he’s not in the closet, but he’s not totally out yet, not officially. I can understand the notion that he doesn’t have to share his sexual orientation. There is dignity is keeping your private life to yourself, god knows, especially in this age of blubbering celebrity confessions.

But Anderson Cooper needs to let “Middle America” know that this is what a gay man looks like. He’s not some Other who’s threatening their Way of Life. He would give gay teenagers someone to look up to, a role model to guide their way. Does he owe it to gays to come out?

I think he does.   Because if he doesn’t, he’s implying that it needs to be a secret. And that has to change.

A popular blogger ‘came out’ recently to reveal that she’s been diagnosed with MS. She is aware that society feels uncomfortable around people with incurable illness, and people in chronic pain. But she empowered herself (even though I still hate the word “empowered”) by speaking up. Now, more people will feel okay about being who they are.

Everyone needs to practice tolerance and acceptance. We should condemn only stupidity and narrow-mindedness. I don’t know if it’s PC to call myself a fag hag, but I do love my gays and I want them to get married so I can nag them to let me be Best Man at the wedding.

Should Anderson Cooper come out? Or should he keep quiet like Tom Cruise, John Travolta and George Clooney?

I would like to apologize for the state of California, its idiotic voters and its supreme court, on this black day in our history.

I did my best to prevent the election of a stupid body builder as Governor of California, which to this day he still cannot pronounce. I protested with a big sign and everything.

Now we have an 11 % unemployment rate, and a budget deficit of 21 billion dollars, and gay couples can’t get married.

I’m really sorry.   I hope we can do better.

I don’t know about you, but I loved this year’s show. It’s the first one in years that wasn’t a grim chore to sit through. Hugh “I’m not gay” Jackman was a delightful host, relieving one from the effort of laughing at stupid show biz wisecracks.

The show’s two most dramatic moments were:

1. Jennifer Aniston taking the stage, just a couple of feet from Brad and Angie. You could feel the tension as the possibility of humiliation loomed. It was fabulous, wasn’t it? Your own mind could furnish Jen’s thoughts, and Angie’s, too. I thought I detected a fleeting second of eye contact between Jen and Brad, but I’d need a slo-mo replay to be certain. Jen’s hair extensions were amazing, and her nose was perkier than ever. Still, even if she were stark naked, she had no hope of eclipsing the shocking, otherworldly beauty of Angelina Jolie.

2. The announcement of Sean Penn as best actor. I closed my eyes so I wouldn’t have to deal with the look on Mickey Rourke‘s face. He wanted it so badly! But everyone at my house wanted Sean Penn, and we willed it to happen. We manifested Sean Penn’s award, because we know about The Secret. Too bad for Mickey Rourke. He will have to make do with the Golden Globe and his pinkie rings, walking sticks, and dead dog pendants.

Fashion is the real reason for watching the Academy awards and I personally feel I got my money’s worth. SJP looked like a Bad Witch even though she wore the Good Witch dress. Heidi Klum wore a hideous cheap-looking Roland Mouret, with gigantic crappy earrings. Halle Berry was missing her boobs, a tragedy that has yet to be explained. Did she give them to Salma??

Natalie Portman made everyone happy, as usual, even though her head is too big for her body. She dared to wear a weird shade of pink, and for that I salute her. Tilda Swinton accomplished her annual goal of looking like a frumpy man.

I missed Renee Zellweger! Was she there? Her sourpuss expression and vintage couture were sorely missed. Somewhat filling the void was Goldie Hawn, still convinced that she’s 16 years old.

Zak Efron and Emile Hirsch looked boyishly yummy, but few of the men were impressive. Without George Clooney or Johnny Depp, there was really no one to drool over. Seal probably looked great, but Heidi’s trashy get-up managed to blot out everything around her.

Even if you didn’t want Sean Penn to win, you can’t deny the power and sincerity of his call for equal rights for gays and lesbians. He had the guts to stand for something besides his own narcissism, god bless him.

Comments or arguments, anyone?