1. Admit that everything is horrible and out of control.
2. Accept that no god of anyone’s understanding will step in to fix it. (see historical genocide, natural disasters, Donald Trump.)
3. Turning yourself over to any person or entity will only reduce what’s left of your free will. (see religion, social media, and advertising.)
4. Admit that you are fucked up and that in large part it was your childhood experience that is to blame, along with your genes.
5. Accept your failures and forgive yourself. Ask forgiveness where you deserve it but don’t be surprised if you don’t get it.
6. Look to thinkers you respect for the wisdom you need to keep going. Try Camus, Sartre, Schopenhauer, George Orwell, Doris Lessing, Fran Lebowitz, Tolstoy, Dostoevsky, or Hermann Hesse.
7. See a professional if things get too rough.
8. Accept that you have caused harm but that you are human. Try to do your best going forward.
9. Every day, try to think about someone else and try to do one small thing to ease someone’s burden, even a phone call to someone who lives alone.
10. Realize how repetitive the 12 steps of AA are! Fucking hell! Enough guilt already!
11. Continue to think about other people, since reflecting on your flaws is an endless loop created by brain chemistry gone awry.
12. Reach out to others in your despair! They too know that everything is horrible and out of control! Ask for and offer comfort! Look to art when your brain hurts or your heart aches. And have a drink if you feel like it. I’ve just discovered Flaming Margarita’s and they are amazing!
Word. XO
Brilliant. I agree with every one of them.
I have found the wisdom I need to keep going so many times from you, Sister Wolf. Robert Sapolsky on depression has helped, too, when I feel able to wade through the heavy sciencey stuff.
All 12 are excellent, but number 11, about my fucked up brain chemicals on an endless roller coaster, is so important because in my horrible and out of control state, there is nothing but me, me, me. Thank you for reminding me about other people.
Bwwwwahahaha! Fuck AA.
What, no Rip Torn obituary? That guy didn’t do any of the steps unless they were towards a bar. I mean, do you pour some out in his memory or would he haunt you for wasting perfectly drinkable liquor?
You know, another step would be to organize civic minded Christians, Jews, Muslims, and all the also-ran religious communities to gather at these migrant shelters and see if organized peaceful protest has an effect. Waiting for our elected officials to do the right thing is basically the same as doing nothing.
I’m getting my affairs in order for a potentially extended vacancy. But I’m a quasi shut-in and have nobody I can convince to help me. Please reach out to anyone you may know living near one of these facilities to help organize on site.
Maybe I’m wrong, maybe everything down there is A-OK. But it seems more likely that people are being illegally detained in inhumane conditions and whoever is in charge of the facilities is getting paid with our tax dollars.
I know a lot pf folks think that the occupation of Malheur was justified because apparently it’s OK to break the rule of law if you’re a rancher who refuses to pay taxes. But if you then turn around and say it’s OK for the government to take children, not fetuses, mind you, actual real live born children, and allow them to die while in our custody, then you’re a fucking cunt and you should get down there too so we can see your cunt face and read holy texts at it.