ANGELINA EXEGESIS

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Whoever you are, you want Angelina Jolie. You can deny it, but you know it’s true. If you resent sharing such a popular  fantasy and wish you could resist her appeal, I’m here to let you off the hook.

You can’t help wanting Angelina, and this is why: Man, woman, baby, mother, warrior, Angelina is all things to all people. Her body is both male and female, angular and rounded. Thin but full. If you had sex with her, you would have the thrill of a threesome without the awkward morning-after!

Scientific theory maintains that women with baby faces, such as Kate Moss, who has big eyes, a small, full mouth and small nose,  are attractive because they trigger the warm protective feelings we have towards small children. Think of Bambi, or Manga characters. When you gaze at the face of Angelina Jolie, you are looking at an exaggerated baby. Look! Look at that big head and lips and button nose! It’s the cutest, biggest baby ever!

Devil temptress and homewrecker, Saint and mother, humanitarian and nutcase. Angelina cannot be denied. Jen never had a prayer, did she? If Angelina were after your husband, your wife, or even your baby, you would be toast.

Let’s  all give in. It’s Angelina’s world.  We’re just living in it.

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4 Responses to ANGELINA EXEGESIS

  1. Mark Poirier says:

    I think her eyes are the correct distance from one another, too. She has it all. What’s interesting is that she chose Brad Pitt, who looks like a twelve year-old girl (if you sand away the acne scars).

  2. Bunty Van Beaver says:

    Well I’ve got to say that I don’t think that I’d do her….and let’s face it, I’m not all that picky

  3. Major Hooters says:

    Well, I sure would and wouldn’t hesitate about it either. She has always been hot to me and probably always will. She would make a good 1 nighter, not to sure about her mothering ability. But I’m dreaming and will never know anyway, so back to the dreaming and pounding away at what would be a wonderful night…

  4. pinky says:

    Amen!!

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