Bed, Bath & Way Beyond

Bed, Bath & Beyond is recalling its Dual Ridge Metal Boutique tissue holders, which were found to be contaminated with radioactive material.

The contamination was first discovered in California when two packages bound for stores in Santa Clara and San Jose containing four tissue holders triggered radiation alarms at truck scales, according to a Jan. 6 report posted on the NRC website.

In the notice on its website, Bed, Bath & Beyond said the  Nuclear Regulatory Commission says the tissue holders do not pose a threat to anyone’s health.

No threat to anyone’s health, no no no no.

Nuclear Regulatory Commission spokesman David McIntyre told The Associated Press that there is little to no risk to human health, but it’s better to avoid unnecessary exposure to radiation.

Got that? It’s better to avoid radiation. You know, if possible.

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9 Responses to Bed, Bath & Way Beyond

  1. David Duff says:

    I want one, mummy, because then my bum will glow in the dark!

  2. Sisty says:

    Fuckers.

  3. Bevitron says:

    Well, as long as a hazmat suit comes with it, okay then. It’s just that it makes it such a bitch to blow your nose.

  4. Cricket9 says:

    WTF?! I’d like to know how the contamination happened; also, why anyone ever needs a tissue holder.
    Regarding “little or no risk to human health” – I have wonderful memories from the fifties (the golden years of the cold war) of a school visit to a shelter under a residential buildings complex where I lived. You, the Americans, were going to nuke us, Poles; luckily, the shelter was ready, and after spending some undefined time there, the radiation would pose no risk to human health.
    For some reason they made us wear gas masks during the visit; that’s probably when I became claustrophobic.

  5. Gary says:

    We just need to use these tissue holders at the Airport xray scanners and then they will be safe.

  6. JK says:

    Is it just me? Doesn’t a sentence containing these two at once “Bed, Bath & Beyond said the Nuclear Regulatory Commission” challenge one’s confidence?

  7. Andra says:

    Cricket: I wondered the same thing – why would you need a holder for your tissues? They are a perfectly legimitate item and nothing to be embarrassed about, surely.
    JK: Perhaps it’s time for a Department of B.B.B. Nuclear Affairs.

  8. Deni says:

    Ditto, Sisty!

  9. Juri says:

    Thank you, once again, for watching these events so I don’t have to!

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