I’m sorry but I can’t do my annual exegesis. I kept missing key performances/debacles, but I saw enough to inspire this quiz. Ready?
1. What is the difference between Machine Gun Kelly and Travis Barker?
2. Why is Doja Cat?
3. Olivia Rodrigo is trying to
a. be Taylor Swift
b. be Alanis Morissette
c. annoy the fuck out of me
4. Madonna has
a. morphed into Mae West
b. morphed into Bette Davis
c. lost her mind
d. a thing with her butt
5. Lil Naz X is payback for
a. WAP
b. homophobia
c. our collective sins
6. Travis Scott forgot to thank
a. God
b. his Mama
c. Kylie Jenner
d. Travis Barker
e. Who is Travis Scott? Is he the same as ASAP Rocky?
7. Justin Bieber won artist of the year because
a. you tell me
b. what????
c. Covid
8. Kid Laroi and Jack Harlow are
a. a couple of dudes
b. a couple
c. bank robbers
9. Camila Cabello even irritates my otherwise nonjudgmental husband because of her
a. mediocrity
b. air of importance
c. chunky legs
10. The show’s most noteworthy butt belonged to
a. Chloe
b. That twerking woman with a blond wig whose name I still can’t find out
c. duh, Madge
I watch this show every year because I
a. want to see what the kids are up to
b. feel I owe it to you
c. enjoy being horrified
d. don’t know right from wrong
e. respect tradition
f. feel less-than
e. have no common sense
f. need stuff to sneer at
g. am mentally ill
Okay, let me know how you do. But first, please enjoy Bieber’s acceptance speech! Just trust me on this.
1) hair color? Possibly 4” of height?
4) Madonna has lost her mind and self worth. She stammered through her one line, but managed to swear in it. And was unsteady on those big shoes.
6) E
7) B
I appreciate you taking one for the team and covering a-g for us/with us
MGK and pearls pasted on his face was really, um. Something.
I didn’t watch it. I don’t know any of these people, except old Madonna. What’s she done with her ass?
Somebody rush artist of the year guy to a cemetery. In fact, take the whole crowd.
Sorry, shitty mood.
LOL What HAS ‘old Madonna’ done to her ass? Stuffed it with Tampax? Loved your comments! Makes me realize I’m not the only one questioning her sanity for watching. XO