Reading the little profiles of people on tumblr, I noticed that a few people described themselves as eccentric. Like, ‘eccentric 19 year old art student loves cats, drawing, photography cupcakes and random cartoons.’
My feeling is, you don’t describe yourself as eccentric. That’s a conclusion made about you by someone else. It just seems unseemly. Like calling yourself ‘classy,’ it’s kind of a self-negating word.
Naturally my husband failed to see the problem. I explained that actual eccentrics would not describe themselves as such. They tend to take no notice of how odd they are, but rather to find others baffling. The most eccentric people I’ve ever known would never describe themselves that way.
Therefore, almost by definition, these self-described eccentrics are just being pretentious. My husband then asked me what other words I would categorize as unseemly. I came up with “complex” and “complicated’ as well as ‘lanky.” I don’t know where the lanky came from, but it’s certainly not a word to use about oneself unless you want to be sickening.
It was frustrating to try to make my point when to another wordist, I’m sure it’s all a given. It’s pretentious to use certain words about yourself, even if those words are fairly accurate. Maybe you’re quirky, but don’t bill yourself as quirky. It’s an evaluation for others to make.
I was excited about getting into this conversation with someone as sensitive and prohibitive about words and word-usage as I am. I though of calling Cousin Russell, who’s always up for a word discussion. But what I really wanted was Max, because he would know exactly what I meant and he would be eager to throw in some other words that he found unacceptable in the same way.
I need someone to be Max. When it hit me, I started to cry, even though we were on our first weekend vacation in a year and a half. Maybe my other nephew can help. I need someone who cringes when they hear a room or building called a ‘space.’
Anyone care to help out? Agree or disagree, as long as you have strong opinions about words.
A wonderful discussion, SW!
I may be a bit off-topic, but I wonder which school of journalism the author of this gem (from Elle-Decor) came from:
“Great dinner parties are like great opera performances,” says the effervescent Manhattanite, a sparkling presence in fundraising circles and on the front row of fashion shows”.
Could it possibly be more pretentious? How “sparkling” and “effervescent” this woman is? Does she blow bubbles out of her nose, or are we talking about a glass of Alka-Seltzer?
Fashion and shelter magazines are full of this kind of crap, and I just want to kick the authors in the balls.
maybe we just don’t describe ourselves
I get what you mean about needing someone ~on your wavelength~
@Rach: SPOT ON with that fucking Marilyn Monroe quote.
It really bothers me when people refer to themselves as “nerds” or “geeks”. When you say ” oh my gosh, I a such a nerd” what you are really saying is “I think I am really, really smart.” That bothers the shit out of me.
I hate it when people claim that their style choices or lifestyle choices “Challenge the Paradigm”.
Please.
Oh my Lord, you guys ARE mad, and just a little bit scary.. there is serious stuff going on out there, surely a little misused ‘wordage’ (eeeeek!!) can’t be that drastic.. On saying that, I really hate it when people say ‘keep it real’ what the f…!! and ‘too easy’ it never is.
Ooooh, the word pop, as in a pop of color. That one really bothers me. Or using the word home when what you mean is house. Or the word utilize when you should just say use. My supervisor does that, and we all laugh at his pretentious ass. I agree that descriptives like classy and eccentric should never be used to describe onesself; it just smacks of Trying Too Hard. Whenever my mother and sister tell me I’m crazy, I tell them in my best faux-southern accent, “No, no. I am charmingly eccentric; YOU motherfuckers are crazy.” Then we all cackle like the lunatics we are.
Oh, how could have I forgotten this one? The term Good Christian. Ugh! Whenever someone makes it a point to tell me that he or she is a Good Christian, I cross my legs and hang onto my wallet, because one way or another, I’m about to get fucked.
Tallulah, I did not hear (yet) this one – I would probably run away screaming form a self-described “good Christian”. By the way, isn’t that Pride, one of the 7 Mortal Sins? A little Modesty (one of the 7 Cardinal Virtues, I think) please, Good Christians!
By the way, I deflected a Jehova Witness trying to discuss the Bible today at a bus stop, by saying “no thanks, I’m a Buddhist”. This somehow works on them and she left me alone.
I had a really obnoxious roommate in London. My exboyfriend and I took great pride in rolling our eyes when she came around. Seriously, she was the type of person who set up internet in the house but only wired it to her room so she could be the only person to use it. Yeah, you hate her too now.
One day Will comes up to my room laughing hysterically.
“What’s so funny”, I demanded to know.
“I just got Obnoxious Roommate to refer to herself as ‘zainy’. First, who uses that word and second who would go so far to refer to themselves as zainy?”
END SCENE.
I despise people who call themselves “random”. It has given me a dislike for the word.
When someone calls themselves “random” I always want to say “You mean your annoying and cannot follow a conversation?”
I have so much dsilike for that word.
I love this. At least several times a day I find myself incensed by someone’s word usage.
Ever since you pointed out the use of “pop” in relation to fashion, I cringe every time I hear it. My boss seems to be enamored with using it for the new jewelry collection ad I keep wanting to tell her not to use that anymore.
I agree with the usage of nerd, like I’m such a nerd really meaning ” I am adorably awkward” uggghhhh….
I hate it when people use the word “frock” to refer to a casual dress. A lot of times its because they’ve already used the word “dress” a whole bunch of times. I feel like, if you get to the point that you feel like you’ve overused the word “dress,” it’s time to talk about something else. Sometimes they get past “frock” and and they have to resort to “little number,” as in “sexy little number.” I am pretty sure this is supposed to be cute.
Another thing people say that is supposed to be cute is “hubby” instead of “husband.” As in “Khloe, pictured here with her hubby, shows off her baby bump in a frock by ____” BABY BUMP. Ugh, don’t even get me started.
I’m rather surprised no one has listed the term “free spirit” here yet. It’s really just a fancy term for “I can do whatever the fuck I want, unlike you suckers who actually have to work/make money/study, and I’m superior to you because I do none of the above!”
Or maybe I’m the only one who loathes those two words with the fury of a thousand suns.
“Introspective” – when others use it, it’s a thoughtful and subtle comment on the rich inner life of the individual they describe.
When a person uses it for themselves, I can’t help but think they choose that phrase because the pompous little shite thinks he or she is waaaaaaaaaaaaay deeper than you in a way you couldn’t possibly understand because you dont care as much about stuff.
Surely there’s a word for this kind of inappropriate self-praise via description? Auto-accolade? Auto-endorsement?
SW, like Beannie above I am a long-time reader but never quite have had the courage to comment. I have no explanation but wish to send my thoughts and admiration for your dignity and poise during this time. I also admire the sequinned trousers. Screw the haters.
Waaah!!
Thank somebody I live in a small city in the north of nowhere.
I have never ever heard 90% of these words mis-used as suggested.
Waaah!!
I don’t think I could survive in the modern world full of “hipsters” and “young persons”.
I think I would be locked up within a week for a mass killing or two.
Beulah, Beulah, where the fuck is my gun??
Speaking of self-diagnosis.. Is it only women who say things like..
“My problem is I’m too tolerant.. too giving.. too forgiving..”
The worst male bastard would never think of inflating his ego by pretending to damn himself..
“My problem is I don’t hurt enough people.. I’m too merciful..”
I think the lesson we should all learn here is that we should never EVER describe ourselves. Remain a mystery. Just don’t call yourself mysterious.
^ I second that motion.
Hi, Sister Wolf.
I completely agree with you, that one just cannot label themselves with some words but the actual reason I’m writing is not to agree with you. I hope I will never understand what it is like to lose a son, all I want to say is that I hope you are careful with comparing Max in situations. I do of course not know, if you only do it sometimes but I have lost a brother myself and almost everytime my family would do something together my mother would sit in the corner, detached and compare how things would be much better with my brother there. It not only made me feel like hell and belittled, it surely made my mother feel bad, too. I suspect she still blames herself. I only wanted to comment, not to say not to miss Max (he sounds like he was a wonderful person) and also not to say that you shouldn’t mention him in situations, I just wanted to let you know, that if you of course have enough energy to do it, you should let the people around you know, that you still love them and not only Max. I know it’s hard but I also know, that it would have saved me a lot of grief and selfdoubt, if my mother had the strength to do this. I hope you are not insulted and of course, if you feel like I am totally wrong please do ignore it. I just wanted to let you know, that while you have had a major loss in your life, a loss which probably cannot even be described, you still have something and somebody left and they most likely need to hear, that you need them.
I wish you all the best.
Agreed with EJ. I do hate “young bright things” – beloved by the British press; they are usually not that bright, but come from big $$$, or Mom is a Duchess or some such. I also had a now ex-friend who was fond of saying “I’m like a child – I can’t tell a lie” , then lying through her teeth in the next sentence. Her second favourite saying was “I was born that way”, used as an excuse for behaving like a spoiled princess.
Generally, people are exactly the opposite of what they most loudly proclaim themselves to be.
Eccentric = stuffy, lanky = chubby, etc.
I quite like plucky?!
Also –
CREATIVE.
Translation: “I reblog about other people’s creative things on my Tumblr.”
Does lanky mean something different outside of the UK? It’s not a compliment here.
Oh God, has anyone mentioned the term “epic fail” yet?
And I agree with whoever said “random” – as in someone describing him/herself as “random.”
I usually hear lanky used to describe a tall, lean built person with long arms and legs in the US. I’ve only heard it used positively.
Only a few minutes on Etsy will make a person hate “chunky” and “steampunk.” Moreso, “tribal/ethnic.”
I like to imagine if I was a celebrity and had to describe myself in interviews like they do..and I imagine I would probably tell the interviewer to f* off..Seriously the most annoying thing ever is to hear a celebrity say they are this or that..stfu
Ooh, can I add one more thing?
The “you’re only as sick as your secrets” thing on tag lines, email signatures, blog headers, etc. makes me itchy. Like, you mean that I’m not living right because I’m not wandering around, telling everyone that I don’t really love my job and find my sister in law loud at times? I’m not entitled to those secrets? Yes, I know it’s a recovery thing, but do we all have to be recovering in public all the time?
I once heard a girl refer to her breasts as “epic”.
edgy makes me bleed inside. “cookie” used in the same way as “quirky”, making stupid words like flowy, boutique-y like fashion magazines do should be punishable by public torture. Almost every day i feel explosive over people’s incorrect word usage. Pizzazy is not a word. if you actually read you can find real words that describe what you want to say. using all these stupid cliches is so lazy. All this said, I can not spell to save my life, and have horrid horrid grammar. So I am a total hypocrite. But at least I am not a free spirited quirky rugged individualist.
If you really want to scream go read some dating sites.
I’ve got it, whimsical, I hate that word. It makes me think of talky types in flower hats going on and on and on…
Also when someone says “I’m an artist…” as if it is to be broached with holy reverence. No one should believe their own shit. Most “artists” would actually question the concept til the day they die
See here http://www.google.com/search?q=Kim+Gordon+art&hl=en&client=safari&prmd=ivnso&tbm=isch&tbo=u&source=univ&sa=X&ei=4nq3TYGzDuXUiAK-kf0U&ved=0CCAQsAQ&biw=981&bih=661.
Is it just me or is this art yanking a chain of some kind ? Are there some people who are allowed to take a shit and call it art and we just nod in agreement while others with incredible skill toil in obscurity. Do they believe their own hype ? I found this confounding especially as it warranted a column in WWD. Like really ?? Okay…
To be fair, Kim Gordon is mostly famous for being in Sonic Youth, not for being a visual artist. and I did not read the WWD article, but I think she has an LA based clothing line.
Your first commenter hit it for me: intense.
When a person refers to him or herself as intense, it usually means they’re a cunt. No, not usually; always.
Intense: Cuntish
Quirky: they shop at Hot Topic and like ‘Napoleon Dynamite’
Random : they’re stupid
Edgy: See Quirky, and replace ‘Napoleon Dynamite’ with ‘Fight Club’
Introspective: pathological masturbator
Creative: if male, gay; if female, foul-smelling.
Dating websites are treasure troves for this shit. I don’t know how many assholes say they’re looking for a ‘partner in crime.’
Marky – I thought “intense” meant “psychopath.”
I hate when people say they are:
“random”
“real and hate fake people”
“bubbly”
or they try to sound badass by saying “i can be your best friend….or your worst enemy.” Why say this on your facebook profile, seriously? haha.
I had an ex who was so pretentious, I had to break up with him on those grounds, because/although I knew that it had been bred into him and there was no way it could be stamped out, even kindly (and who has the energy for that).
He was forever saying ‘environs’, without a trace of self consciousness….Even thinking the word now makes me cringe inwardly.
emma – “Environs”?!?!?!? I’m glad you divorced him. My husband’s ex-wife likes to say ” I’m enamored of” instead of “I like.”
When people describe themselves as eccentric, they are referring to their ink and their casual attitude towards laundry. Both of which make them a dime a dozen.
DCD – How can a person describe their own self as “random”???? Surely one’s self is “specific!”
I just looked at my old myspace page to see if I used any of these offending words to describe myself. I think I did pretty well! http://www.myspace.com/nigress
Cricket9 – that is some truly awful writing. How do they do it???
“Environs” reminds me of a local online reviewer (here, in the heart of the uncool Midwest) who posed in a fur wrap and described herself as “mad about all things epicurian” which made me hate wraps and the words “mad” if not used as a synonym for “angry” and “epicurian” unless used by, say a 400lb Frenchman in a white coat and toque.
I had an ex who referred to himself as “intense” when really he was just acting like a shithead. I think all your observations on that matter word and the person using it to refer to themselves, ring true.
Why in the hell would someone call themselves “random?”
I couldn’t decide whether to use “matter” or “word” so I just used them both!
Tricia, why indeed?
Why are so many people talking so much shit?
I was taught to be succinct.
Why are people saying so many words but not saying anything?
Especially politicians.
I want them ALL shot – soon.
Arg. I loved reading this, but now I feel like a Xanax and a lie down….why are people so stupid and annoying?
(Ok, I do suffer from PMDD, but fuck it).
Perhaps the best revenge is to ‘mirror’ these idiots. Might be fun to see if they notice….
Just a thought 🙂
Perhaps I’ll seek out that ex and see how often I can drop ‘environs’ into a conversation…
Can’t believe I just read this! I say the EXACT same thing! My daughter has a Facebook and one of the girls on there keeps stating how ‘different’ she is!! I said to my daughter that if she were really so ‘different’ she wouldn’t need to state the obvious and as you so rightly say would more than likely be unaware of her differences!! I hate it when people label themselves in descprition headers with things such as I’m a Goth, I’m dark, I’m weird, I’m eccentric. I am SO fucking cliche. It sounds pretentious as Hell, so yes I totally agree with you on this one sis!