Lazy Celebrity Post

I love it when Madge looks like this. I get a rush of endorphins that’s better than shopping or chocolate! Keep up the good work, girl!

I also love seeing before and after pix of celebrities. But not when they aim to erase their ethnicity.

I prefer Halle Berry in her high school photo. When she was black, and a girl.

What about J Lo? Doesn’t she look like Karla’s Closet in the before photo??!? In the after photo, she looks like she’s half-way to becoming Kate Moss.

Never mind. I’m going back to snicker at Madonna until the high wears off.

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37 Responses to Lazy Celebrity Post

  1. Yep Madonna has made me feel very good to ref my clothes choices – ’nuff said!

  2. Dru says:

    Erase their ethnicity? More like ‘lose the silly 80s hair and age twenty years’, (that’s what brings out the cheekbones).

    Besides, ethnicity-erasing is more or less impossible if you’re not white or not Michael Jackson. I have a lot more to say about it, but this might not be the place for it, so enjoy your high, Sister.

  3. Dru says:

    Though Halle’s nose certainly looks….different.

  4. Jane Schott says:

    I needed this post this morning….brilliant, so glad I found you.

  5. Mariloo says:

    And imagine those are the people who say in every single interview:
    “be happy with your self”,”everyone is beautiful” blablabla
    They are sooo boriiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiing.Why they dont just say:my kind of beauty is 576 operations,23 hours a day at the gym and the right light at the photos!
    we would TRY to understand,we promise!

    asinneratyourdinner.blogspot.com

  6. EJ says:

    I kind of prefer Halle’s shorter hair. The amount of plastic surgery that goes on in Hollywood is astounding though.

    Re: ‘erasing ethnicity’, I tried to find this fascinating article I read about it years ago (mostly focussed on the early years of cinema) but failed. This one comes vaguely close though- the change that Rita Hayworth went through is remarkable http://www.cracked.com/article_17501_5-celebrity-careers-launched-by-ethnic-makeovers.html

  7. Cricket9 says:

    Mariloo forgot to add “and many hours of photoshopping”. J Lo was gorgeous is her early movies, now she’s Hollywood pretty.
    I’m surprised that “What not no wear” people are not chasing after Madonna wherever she goes – although I prefer this to her “English Lady” phase with tweed jackets and “wellies”.

  8. court says:

    good call on the karla’s closet.

    those are some helluva nosejobs!

  9. Nickie Frye says:

    Halle Berry is looking a little like Prince in this photo. Just give her a mustache & a purple guitar.

  10. kellie says:

    they must have a lot of spare time and not be adverse to the pain.
    None of it is comfortable.
    Noses are really painful.

  11. Oh Madonna…. I wish she stayed the cute litlle Italian looking girl she was early on. Now shes shudder inducing!
    XXX
    Suzanne

  12. Lezzies says:

    Dear Dru — Despite what Michael Jackson did to his skin, he was always considered a black man. And I dont understand “if you’re not white”- did you mean white folks CAN erase their ethnicity? or that they have none to erase? Neither of which I believe are true.

    This post is offensive.

  13. Dru says:

    Dear Lezzies- If Halle Berry and Jennifer Lopez can be considered ethnicity erasures despite anyone who is even vaguely familiar with them knowing that one is black and the other has Spanish-speaking roots, then Michael Jackson is one too.

    And as for the other part…as most people know, ‘ethnic’ these days is a term mostly used to refer to visibly non-white people (who often face a fair bit of prejudice for the way they look- it used to include Mediterraneans, not sure about whether it does, these days). Being ethnic isn’t quite the same as looking ‘ethnic’, for those of us who do.

    Please feel free to be offended some more, if you like.

  14. Dru says:

    If it isn’t clear, I do believe white folks have ethnicity too. Hence the “being ethnic is not the same as looking ‘ethnic’ part of my comment.

  15. TheShoeGirl says:

    Halle Berry looks NOTHING like she did in high school. How sad.

  16. TheShoeGirl says:

    How is this post offensive by the way? And I like how you just announce it at the end of your comment like you’re the authority on what’s offensive.

    I hereby dub this post.. (pause for dramatic effect) ..OFFENSIVE.

  17. Cricket9 says:

    For fuck’s sake, we ALL have some sort of ethnicity. I’m white, from Europe, all my known ancestors are too. One day I will have a DNA test to find out why my late father looked like a brother of Leonard Cohen – a coincidence or maybe not? If I would darken my skin and have eye surgery to create a mongoloid fold, IMO it could be an attempt to alter my ethnic look.
    I declare that Dru’s post…(dramatic pause) is not offensive to me.
    Now I have to go and hang politically incorrect offensive Christmas lights, even though I’m an atheist heathen and will burn in hell anyway. Ciao!

  18. Lezzies says:

    Dru — I completely agree with the first part of your reply. I don’t consider either of those women “ethnic erasures”; hence, me being offended by this post.

  19. the real andrea says:

    What’s also interesting in addition to them erasing their “ethnicity”, is that these women have had their noses “refined”(as has almost everyone in Hollywood, including Kate Hudson, Angelina Jolie, Blake Lively) and are held up as beacons of otherworldly beauty that rarely occurs naturally (with the exception of Natalie Portman. And Madonna may have done the nose job thing also). So many young girls look up to these women and compare themselves to them thinking that must measure up to that standard of beauty. But the celebs didn’t look like that naturally either. Google Blake Lively nose job and see her pre- Gossip Girl nose. She looks totally different. Not a Vogue cover girl nose a few years ago. And it’s also with the weight thing too. What post partum woman is back to their pre pregnancy body with no flab in 3 weeks? Only the ones that have a tummy tuck at the same time as the C section, that’s who.

  20. Iron Chic says:

    Have you noticed that Madge looks cross-eyed sometimes?!?!
    I’m most offended by porcelain veneers- I HATE that look.

  21. alittlelux says:

    YES. i love looking at the before and afters! i love that website bad celebrity plastic surgery… http://www.awfulplasticsurgery.com. have fun!

  22. Bevitron says:

    The first thing that popped into my head, looking at Madge’s pic, was the Bette Davis look in “Whatever Happened to Baby Jane” –
    http://28.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_l2jesmBsdJ1qbrvggo1_500.png

    It looks like it won’t be too long.

  23. annemarie says:

    Come on, Madonna’s dress is like totally offensive.

  24. Dru says:

    annemarie- no, it’s not the dress that’s offensive, it’s that silly belt and her neck chains.

    Lezzies- Ah, well, we do agree on something. (I disagree with Sister’s post, but as someone who’d most def. get called the e-word, I’m not offended)

  25. Sister Wolf says:

    Lezzies & Dru – Please explain (so that I may understand, cuz I’m trying) what offends you about this post? It is the word “ethnicity?” I will gladly exchange another word if you have a more apt one!)

    Both Halle Berry and Jennifer Lopez have deliberately sought to de-emphasize if not eradicate physical characteristics that identify them as Black and Latina, respectively.

    As EJ pointed out, this has been going on a long time in Hollywood. Rita Hayworth is a grat example. Tons of Jewish actors who got nosejobs and changed their surnames…you know what I’m saying.

    It seems like a sad but inarguable fact.

  26. Aja says:

    Goodness Madge’s face is pulled tight. I’m not offended by the ethnic erasure note. It’s common knowledge that often having nose jobs, hair straighteners, etc . . . are sort of leaning towards an Aryan view on beauty. Though Halle Berry is mixed race . . . I keep thinking of that day when I stop straightening my hair . . . but really in some cases, it’s a simplicity thing. I have a lot of hair. If I had to deal with it naturally, it would be another stress in my life. One which I’m not quite prepared to take on at the moment.

  27. Oh My God.
    And I was just about to get plastic surgery to look like Sarah Palin.

    Thank you for making me come to my senses.

    I’ll just stick to being Wealthy Asian Mom Blogger. 🙂

  28. patni says:

    Madge like she just wet herself.

  29. Nadia says:

    WOW! J Lo totally did look like Karla’s Closet!

  30. Cat says:

    I have to say I just love Bag Snob Tina.

  31. Dru says:

    Sister- I’m not offended, I just said so! It’s just that changing one’s features to look less stereotypically [fill in the blank] is something that I believe doesn’t actually alter it, or the perception of someone as ‘ethnic’ in the first place.

    Not that people don’t do it- but at the end of the process they’re still themselves, but in horrible Hollywood parlance “black but not too black” (substitute ‘black’ with your ethnicity of choice).

  32. Dru says:

    And also, like the real andrea says, white actresses get cosmetic surgery too. It’s just a little annoying that non-white actresses have the additional burden of ‘letting the side down’ when they do it, and get discriminated against anyway (maybe a little less than before, but still).

  33. Ann says:

    No no no, this isn’t starting again with the “offensive” bit. Stop! There was nothing offensive about Dru’s initial post! It’s actually way more offensive to be reading shit into people’s comments THAT JUST ISN’T THERE!

    Let’s all just gather in joy at the mess that Madge is, instead.

  34. Aja says:

    Truthfully Hollywood just needs fixing in general. All these celebrity woman strive to look a like and it’s really worrying, in my opinion. My schnozz is rather big and I’ve grown to love it through the years, it’s part of what makes me, me. I would NEVER fix it, even if it stood between me and millions of dollars.

  35. Witch Moma says:

    I’m w/ANN! That image of Madge got my morning off to a terrific start.

  36. erika says:

    I just saw another picture of Madonna, she looks like she got cheek implants and fat injections. It’s awful. I will eat my pizza safe in the knowledge that I have enough fat in my face that i won’t have to pay for some at a future date.

  37. erika says:

    also Halle may have tweaked her nose a little but growing up she was fat and losing all that weight can change your face a bit.

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