The James Franco Project

In his quest to annoy every living being, James Franco is set to portray Robert Mapplethorpe in an  upcoming  movie project.

He will also play Hugh Hefner and the Wizard of Oz in two movies currently in post-production. But you can’t fully appreciate his work until you’ve see him play Allen Ginsberg in “Howl.” Hearing him intone Ginsberg’s poetry in his thin nasal voice, you can almost detect the rustling sound of the poet spinning in his grave.

I hope to see James Franco play Hitler, Mao Zedong, Golda Meir, Emily Dickingson,  Napoleon, Isadora Duncan, Jack Kerouac, Miles Davis,  Florence  Nightingale, Salvador Dali, Maya Angelou,   Albert Einstein, and of course, The Holy Trinity.

I can even see him playing Patti Smith opposite his Robert Mapplethorpe!

Who would you like to see James Franco take on next?

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28 Responses to The James Franco Project

  1. Srenna says:

    Amelia Earnhart.

    (Sister Wolf, you are too funny!)

  2. Srenna says:

    ^”Earhart”… I spelled her name wrong.

  3. Lizzardbitch says:

    Mel Gibson, Patty Hearst and the Father, Son, AND Holy Spirit.

  4. Sister Wolf says:

    Hahahahahaahahahahaha! Brilliant!

    I forgot Eleanor Roosevelt.

  5. Muffy says:

    Eva Peron….ooops been done by Madonna

  6. Cricket9 says:

    Richard Burton AND Elizabeth Taylor in a “biopic” movie. Also, Lech Walesa in a movie about Solidarity movement; and, maybe, Walesa’s wife.

  7. MJ says:

    Well said on all accounts (poor Alan G, he didn’t deserve this). I now believe that Franco’s “performance art” is seeing how annoying he can be, period, until we’re collectively fed up.

  8. Andra says:

    Mussolini meets Pol Pot (both parts) with Meryl Streep as Shirley Temple…. the musical.

    Who is this person, anyway?

  9. Suspended says:

    Whitney Houston, feat. Spandex in florescent pink.

  10. ali says:

    ugh. he is playing the wizard in “OZ THE GREAT AND POWERFUL”.

    as a child reared on the magic of the frank l baum series… and as someone who sowed her bitter oats in franco after we got over the hating jane phase…

    consider me defeated.

  11. ali says:

    oh you mentioned the oz thing. i just saw franco’s face and suffered a blackout.

  12. ali says:

    he can play a honeybucket driver. They advertise for that position on craigslist all the time. it would be true metaphysical irony if he played a writer driving a honeybucket delivery vehicle to make ends meet… whilst moonlighting as a professor teaching a poetry in screenplay gradschool course at NYU.

    don’t mind me. I am just unemployed. nearly broke. and i want to vomit my refry beans dinner all over every picture of james franco that ever existed.

  13. ali says:

    i dont know if metaphysical irony is a thing. but if its a thing its a creature that either lives under james franco’s bed or in his pants.

  14. anA says:

    Sister, I just laughed for five minutes straight. You are a funny lady. I would like to see James Franco play Steve Jobs in Lifetime movie. I also think he would make a great Joseph Stalin in my screenplay, called “Joe the Intolerant.” He could also play the role of Stalin’s daughter Svetlana.

  15. CR says:

    OMG Sister, have you SEEN this? Everything we ever supposed about Carol is TRUE!!! FREE CAROL!
    http://jezebel.com/5899546/jane-aldridges-parents-gave-her-several-hundred-thousand-dollars-to-spend-on-shoes

  16. Cricket9 says:

    Jane and Mom bought a truckload of giant brass animals – again. I think by now the collection can be seen from space.

  17. Marky says:

    Trayvon Martin. Rosy O’Donnell can play George Zimmerman. Vincent Gallo can direct. Gravitas.

  18. Winterbird says:

    Blanche Dubois…

  19. Bevitron says:

    I await his interpretations of Julius Caesar, Babe Ruth, Yoko Ono, Moses, Jascha Heifetz, Moms Mabley, Abraham Lincoln, Lassie, and Walter Cronkite.

  20. Sisty says:

    Biopics of Frieda Kahlo and Susan Boyle, running the gamut from A to Z.

  21. Brie says:

    Mother Teresa, The Virgin Mary, and Rin Tin Tin.

  22. Debra says:

    Osama Bin Laden, Liberace, Sammy Davis Jr. and the rest of the Rat Pack, Jeffrey Campbell, Michael Jackson, Sarah Palin, Lindsay Lohan, all of the Beatles and Nikola Tesla.

  23. Juri says:

    I want to see him play the Red Sea in the remake of The Ten Commandments. Or the baby carriage in Battleship Potemkin.

    Then again, he could be all seven samurais or the entire mass of people in some war movie with lots of casualties.

  24. candy says:

    He could easily play Charles Manson,as he has dark hair.

  25. Andra says:

    And speaking of strange blokes, what’s the news on Phil Spector?
    Any sign of sanity?

  26. Srenna says:

    Juri: Ahahhahaha! I loved the Red Sea suggestion.

  27. Taylor says:

    The role I would like to see him take on next would be removing my clothes.

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