The Real Housewives of Venice


Last night some time after midnight, while trying to figure out why I was watching a show called “Miami Social” since I can never remember who the characters are or which ones are the more offensive, I was rudely interrupted by police helicopters circling over my house.

It became so noisy that my husband looked outside and said there were police cars in the street, flashing lights and talking on their radios.

For the next 3 hours,   the helicopters circled and every so often a directive was given through a bullhorn, like “You have one minute to come out and put down your weapons.” This particular announcement was really exciting as I watched through my front window. I complained to my husband, “Now they need to follow up with a consequence!” As every parent knows, you can’t just issue a One Minute threat and then not deliver. It’s just bad behaviorism.

I called the LAPD early on in this adventure to ask what was going on, and was told that the cops were looking for a suspect in a domestic violence incident. Today, I’d like to know if they caught the suspect or if he’s hiding in my garage.

Anyway, after narrating the action to my husband, screaming “Ooooh, girl, there are 3, no 4 cops at the door over there! Break in the door! Go in there!” I finally gave up and went to look at my YSL Rive Gauche sequin top that I just got at my neighbor hood thrift store.




No police action can stop the hoarding and modeling at the Sister Wolf household. That’s just life in Venice.   The show must go on.

This top is really amazing, must more impressive in person. It zips up the side for a perfect snug fit, and there are little zippers at the cuffs too. One of the shoulders opens with tiny concealed snaps under the gold epaulettes.   There’s a chevron beaded design among all the sequins, and the lining is silk.

Here are the options (assuming the suspect isn’t in my garage and doesn’t kill me) –
1. I can list this top on eBay
2. I can keep it.

If   I keep it, what would I wear it with?!? And since I have nowhere to go, why would I wear it?

Okay, I’m ending this episode with a cliffhanger. Please advise.

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28 Responses to The Real Housewives of Venice

  1. You do look lovely in it!
    I guess if I were a rational person I’d say sell it on eBay for a profit…but since I’m not I say keep it and you’ll have an occasion to wear it to sometime. Or you could just wear it with jeans like all the hip fashion bloggers.

  2. K-Line says:

    OK, I’m usually all for hanging onto the designer loot but it occurs, if you aren’t going to wear it, this would be a perfect time to make a tidy profit. Either way, you’re a winner!

  3. andrea says:

    Ebay it for sure! It’s a little too glitzy for my taste, if you really want to know. And because it is YSL, you may make a nice profit in it. Then you can buy some nice stuff from shopbop! (hahaha).

  4. Tobi Lynne says:

    The helicopter thing has been a constant, almost nightly occurrence since I moved here … 9 years later, it’s background noise. Although, I’ve never got to see an up close stand off like that, so I’m green with envy.

    The top – keep it. Wear it with tight dark wash jeans … and either skinny black boots or strappy gold high, high heeled somethings or other. Better yet, don’t take my advice. I’m a fashion disaster. You should probably sell it, or wear it in a way completely unlike my suggestion.

    Gotta go … almost time to break open that bottle of wine and settle in to watch True Blood and drool over the vamp boys!

  5. WCGB says:

    Keep it. Duh–all the closures and “chevron beaded design”!!

    Your apparent confusion is due to the current season. This is not summer attire!

    The “with” issue is more complex (especially since I have no natural fashion proclivities). A long, drapey (not too full), bias-cut satin skirt with a train—maybe even in a muted gold? Why? Because you’re going to the Oscars in 1942?

    My bwain hurts. It’s beautiful enough to deserve some simmer time (before you make a final disposition).

  6. WendyB says:

    Keep it. Wear it with jeans. Wear it to the supermarket if you feel like it.

  7. The helicopters remind me of our old DC days. I don’t think we’ve had a single cop flying overhead since we moved to Brooklyn.
    I’m tending to the ebay side. It’s amazing, but it would sit in my closet forever and it looks really hot. It’s humid today.

  8. No question, when one finds YSL, one must keep it. I think its a rule. (Besides, everyone wants things for a bloody pittance on eBay, if anything take it to a high-end consignment shop, you’ll make more.) Perfect attire the next time you hear the helicopters in your neighborhood — throw it on with jeans and “epic” shoes (just like a hipster!), you can say “I’m ready for my close-up Mr. DeMille” when they need someone to interview. (The Sister Wolf show is coming I can feel it…)


  9. Andra says:

    Never satin surely!
    Well, certainly not in Cairns. North Queensland isn’t ready for quite so much glitter …. all the closie things make me nervous.

  10. Queen Michelle says:

    Are you kidding?! In precisely one week I’ll be officially sitting on my arse doing sweet FA every day, scrounging off the government for a fortnightly pittance, but I fully intend on doing it whilst wearing various ridiculous and pointless headpieces and masks. So your top seems like a rather sensibly purchase considering what you could be wearing to do nothing. Plus, sequins suits you.

  11. Keep it in a Miss Havisham way. Wear it while blogging and justify every post with well whilst wearing my YSL Rive Gauche sequin top from my local thrift store. It can speak to you and guide you in dismissing those less stylish and not wearing original not faux rehashed fashion house YSL.

  12. Jill says:

    Keep it for a year…if you never wear it, then sell it on Ebay (I wish I knew how to sell crap on Ebay).
    Wear it with palazzo pants and super high heels.

  13. dust says:

    keep it and wear it!

  14. Deni says:

    Sell, sell, sell. Take the cash and hide it in your mattress. Plus, you look much cuter in skimpier tops; it’s too much fabric and beading and zippers.

  15. Sonia Luna says:

    Fashion doesn’t stop for cops, unless it’s you they are looking for, in which case grab your new sequinned top and run for your life!
    I say keep it, it looks great on you! Wear it anyway you like and everywhere, no special occasion needed for sequins!

  16. hoochiegucci says:

    It’s……erm…….very “Persian”

  17. HelOnWheels says:

    I love that top. I’d say keep it and wear it while you blog. Take photos of yourself whilst you do this. Send photos to Mrs. Palin with a note: “We don’t only wear pajamas! This is a YSL. Even if you knew what that is you could never afford it without the RNC buying it for you! Suck it, Sarah!” Is that too much?

    I think you could sell it to Rumi for very tidy profit. Unfortunately she would just shred that beautiful piece.

  18. annemarie says:

    If it was any old YSL top I would advocate the “keep for a year– if you don’t wear it, sell it.” However it is a SEQUINS (squeeeeeeeeeeeeeeel!!) top, which means that all the fashion twits will be wetting their panties over this and positively falling over themselves trying to buy it on Ebay. So basically, I would sell that fucker as soon as possible.

    Personally, I feel that the twinkle of sequins have been irredeemably tarnished by said idiots. Sequins are so OVER.

    But please, before you sell it, take a picture of yourself wearing it whilst touching your face!

  19. Juri says:

    I’d suggest ebay, unless I knew you’ve got that reality show coming on. The ratings will explode if you include a little bit of bellydancing in that top to each episode.

    I know how it feels to buy beautiful stuff and know you can’t wear it anywhere because lesser mortals can’t grasp the awesomeness. I’ve bought some lovely old brothel creepers on ebay but can’t wear them anywhere since no one will believe I actually looked good in them 25 years ago. On a brighter day I look at them and go, “did I really wear these things on a regular basis?”

    Speaking of ebay, I bought that issue of “Lady Athlete – Profiles of Women in Sports and Related Fields” featuring “The Barbarionettes – Sisters in Iron” by Steve Wennerstrom, and learned that your sister was “the stocky complement” to you, and that “her thick musculature has a more cultivated look,” whereas you derived your look “from the wilds of the jungle.” It was only $25 for the mag but the wanker wanted $15 for P&P so I wound up paying $40 for the leaflet because I was too pround to back down. Now I must start printing those t-shorts to earn that money back.

  20. Juri says:

    *proud, *t-shirts…I was born with a keyboard full of typos

  21. Sister Wolf says:

    Juri – JESUS you nearly made me choke to death on my coffee!!!!!!!!!!!! You will be able to blackmail me FOREVER. Hahahahah! I’m glad you noticed the wildlife motif…..repeated throughout. Like when it says “each has given birth to 2 sons” instead of just ‘has two sons. My sister fell out of my car when she read that she was my stocky complement.

  22. Juri says:

    I can’t blame her, really. Who wants to be a stocky complement? I think I might be able to come up with a worse insult if I really gave it a try but, all in all, it’s hard to imagine a bigger slap in a young woman’s face.

    BUT the beauty of all this was your “total devotion to one another’s training and that [you were] the ultimate training partners in [your] quest for physical perfection…”

    I will SO print, wear and sell the t-shirts.

  23. Sister Wolf says:

    Iheartfashion – I want to be rational! I just listed it.

    K-Line – I used to have a license plate holder that said “Jesus made me a winner.” I miss it!

    Andrea – Yeah, I know you’d never wear it. Too old lady, right?

    Toby-Lynne – Wasn’t it the scariest episode so far?!? I was truly freaked out.

    WCGB – Waaah! I can’t go to the Oscars. But I like your vision for it…

    WendyB – I decided it would look good with a black pencil skirt and black high heels. Which I won’t ever be wearing.

    fashionherald – No copters in Brooklyn? Sounds perfect.

    Suzanne AKA -Hahaha, it would have been great to run outside in that thing and scream “Officer, can I help?”

    Andra – The closie things are the best part!

    Arline – Shit. Can you change that to “sell it?”

    Queen Michelle – I like this attitude. I should be wearing my Viv Westwood horns right now! What the hell is wrong with me??

    Make Do- You are better, I can hear your brain working!

    Jill – You could learn eBay in a minute! It’s the cheapskates that would drive you nuts. It is very very trying.

    dust – Waaaah!

    Deni – It’s very heavy, you’re right.

    Sonia Luna – I could wear it to all the crime-scenes in Venice.

    hoochiegucci – Two words: shoe chair.

    HelOnWheels – I would love Roomy to wear it, maybe with a thong?

    annemarie – Will do.

    Juri – I would love to see you in your brothel creepers. But I am still shaken by the Lady Athlete thing. However, your appreciation of the text is so gratifying!

  24. hammie says:

    Wear Wear Wear! a designer thrift store bargain is a joy forever; how long before you spent the profits of ebay on silly shoes??

  25. KIRAFASHION says:

    so fun look!


  26. 34kimo says:

    Hello Ladies,
    Does anyone know where I can find a RELIABLE and reasonable handyman in the Venice area. I’m just so sick of hiring people that don’t show up and don’t have the decency to call and cancel. What is wrong with people these days? And with all of the people that are unemployed, I would think that they need work. Any help would be greatly appreciated.

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