What an Asshole

I’ve just read an essay by Chrisopher Hitchens called “Why Women Aren’t Funny.” Obviously, it was written to provoke rebuttal, but why does he even bother? An aging drunken bully, Chistopher Hitchens can always be counted upon to express an obnoxious opinion, maybe as an excuse to pout or lose his temper.

In his “women aren’t funny argument,” he postulates that men are funnier because:
1. Women need only be attractive, so they don’t have to develop a sense of humor.
2. Men’s bodies are funnier.
3. Women can’t really be funny because motherhood is such serious business.
4. Men are the oppressed group, and so more likely to rely on humor to get by.

Then, he acknowledges that some women are funny, but that’s because they are either “hefty, dikey or Jewish.” And THEN he explains as an aside that Jewish humor, based on angst and self-deprecation, is “almost masculine by definition.”

What a fucking asshole! Why do I take his bait? Because he’s a stupid old windbag who makes too much money and probably just needs a good ramming with my George Bush butt-plug (Christmas present, still in its presentation box.)

Most of the women in my life are hysterically funny, and I expect nothing less from a bright woman. We might not thinks fart humor is the apex of comedy, but I do have a videotape of an evangelist farting through his entire sermon. Maybe Hitchens has noticed that woman are less taken with bathroom humor, or stupid humor in general. I don’t believe that this proves his argument, though.

Could it be that Hitchens feels threatened by women who are aggressively funny?   He’s cool with Fran Lebowitz, whose humor is low-key and sardonic. But of course she’s a dikey Jew.

I wonder if he’s ever watched Saturday Night Live? He goes on to point out that women don’t welcome humor that’s aimed at their offspring, as though that makes us bad sports, not fit to be members of the Funny Club. Do fathers enjoy jokes at the expense of their children?   Maybe Christopher’s buddies do. When they’re not busy   hating women and worrying about their funnier bodies.

At least when a woman writes an essay like Why Men Pretend to Like Jazz, for example, she can back it up with scientific fact!

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4 Responses to What an Asshole

  1. Suebob says:

    Hitchens is a professional provocateur, and that is all. It is his bread and butter as much as being a rude jerk was (is?) Don Rickles’. He knows it pays the bills.

    Consider the source: this is the same man that wrote a book trashing MOTHER TERESA. He claims he wanted to call it “Sacred Cow.” It was eventually published under the title “The Missionary Position.”

    What’s next: “Hitler: Kind to Animals”? (I have to give Mr Stapler credit for coming up with that one).

  2. kayayarai says:

    Okay, having not read his article, but only yours, I offer these counterpoints to the four you list (by way of supporting your point):
    1. Yeah, like there aren’t any attractive but unsuccessful women out there. Yeesh.
    2. He has a point here.
    3. He was clearly not present when, as I was changing her diaper, my newborn expelled liquid shit in a beautiful brown arch that reached across her bedroom; I, thinking quickly, put my hand up to stop it, which served only to spray it everywhere, including on my unsuspecting cat who was lounging below. Said cat then ran about the house trying to rid itself of the stuff, resulting in feces on walls, stairs, carpets, furniture, and my confused husband’s hand. That was funny motherhood shit.
    4. Wow. This is totally news to me, and if research should show this to be true would explain SO much about life and all its unfairness.

  3. Sister Wolf says:

    I agree that mens’ bodies are funnier, but that just proves that women have an advanced sense of the absurd, or else we wouldn’t be able to handle those funny parts without laughing.

  4. elena says:

    i’m not supposed to be laughing? no wonder i’m in marriage therapy.

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