Accessorize Me (updated)

Having bought the perfect and ultimate black leather dress, I found I was too lame to wear it with anything but more black. I think it looks good with black tights and black shoes, but I want to think of this dress as versatile. Wouldn’t it look great with something else? Like what?

Here it is without me in it. Isn’t it awesome?! It zips up the back and has zippers at the cuff, too.

I wore it to a dinner party and towered over all the women, who may have been midgets. I drank some wine and got involved in a lively theological discussion that led one guest to exclaim “Talmud Schmalmud,” which is my feeling as well.

So, help a sister out on the accessory question. What is your vision for this dress? I have a million pairs of boots, some clunky black high-heels, clunky red high-heels, pointy lace up flats, and that’s about it. I’m willing to buy the right shoes or leg-wear if I only knew what they were.

(If anyone needs to say I look like a drag queen, hurry up and get it over with. Plus, “I look fat but I’m really not.”)

UPDATE:   Romeo’s paper-doll prototypes are very exciting. See?

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41 Responses to Accessorize Me (updated)

  1. Imelda Matt says:

    Hmmm…open toe shoes and a tight?!?!? The dress is smokn’, ditch the open toe shoes for a slick boot and bang on a fuck-off BIG diamonte cuff and your sorted!

  2. Sister Wolf says:

    Hahaha, Imelda, at least you didn’t call me a fat drag queen!!

  3. hammie says:

    Body dysmorphia anyone? you look amazing. I would go black everything except for fuck off red patent courts with a nine inch heel.

  4. David Duff says:

    Er, dare I ask, is that a moose hanging on the wall behind you? And if so …?

  5. annemarie says:

    1. Black fishnets with black hooker shoes.

    2. Red opaques with black fishnets over them and your clunky red high heels.

    3. footless silver tights and those black strappy shoes from the pic.

    4. Whip.

  6. WendyB says:

    Fabulous dress! What a find. You need to wear my onyx skull ring with that, of course.

  7. dewayne says:

    i’m not sure on accessories, but i think you should wear your hair in a severe bun. all i can think is 19th century schoolmarm bondage, in spite of the dress length. i think it’s the sleeves.

    also too as well, that is most assuredly not a moose. it looks like a jagermeister label, which brings me to the conclusion that it is in fact a wall full of jagermeister.

  8. samantha says:

    A pair of lacy tights, black chunky high heel shoes and a winning smile?
    Keep the red lips!

  9. Honeypants says:

    I’m with dewayne on the severe hairdo. It need not be a bun, but it must be severe. And annemarie’s ideas for legwear other than black tights is good too. How high are your highest black boots? Those with any color and/or texture legwear would be great. Though I’m thinking a sheer, shimmery offwhite/silver would be good.

  10. K-Line says:

    Um, you are apparently insane because you think you look fat in that unbelievably hot and stylish dress. I see it with red opaque tights (ones with orange in them) and a chunky heel – maybe even the perfect wedge. I’d go for making it “daytime casual” even though it’s a crazy hot leather dress. Where did you get it??

    PS I just biggened up the dress picture and I think it also has a beautiful, zen – almost monastic quality. So you could play that up – maybe with a very delicate cashmere wrap sweater?

    I love this dress.

  11. Romeo says:

    OK, the only suggestion I have for the dress is a bride of Frankenstein-do, not that it would necessarily go, but I just want to see it. But the dress suggested to me that we could do a paper doll deal with your various accessories. Well, not “we” because it would probably be a total waste of time unless you have enough online and real friends you could sell it to. That first image is a great start and I bet someone could photoshop you right out of that dress, then use a bunch of layers to store pics of your boots and shoes and whatnots. Maybe you could get an intern?

    Long story short: I like coloring books.

  12. Romeo says:

    Also, that set of antlers is the perfect accessory. There have to be deer/moose/elk masks and/or tiaras in the paper doll book.

  13. Susan says:

    First, let me say you look gorgeous!

    This is a superb foundation piece. I like sheer black hose and either knee high black boots or great heels. Add a shawl and long earrings.

    And keep your eye out for a brightly colored wide belt for other combinations.

  14. Miroslav says:

    Chelo? So this how it is with you and your western domicile. Much words here. Too much for man like I. But hunting lodge theme fantastic to welcome my tired steed. Together we will trap and skin, Ekaterina, da? Other crazy Jew woman is frozen gulag to me now. I will not melt her ice. Only one accessorize you need here only with this costume, and now I am arrived.

  15. sleepy says:

    Anything by Christian Louboutin would be cracking.
    Those red soles would do it in an ‘understated’ way, if that is possible!

  16. HelOnWheels says:

    Stunning! You and the dress. I could see some texture, both for evening and day looks: textured and lace leggings and tights in jewel tones and with some metalic in them. Big-ass gold or silver cuffs. Shoes would depend on the legwear choice.

  17. enc says:

    White go-go boots.

  18. Sister Wolf says:

    Hammie -Ooooh! I wouldn’t be able to walk but it sounds stunning.

    David- Calm yourself. It’s a fake deer head.

    annemarie – I think the silver tights are not age-appropriate. But I do have lots of fishnets.

    WendyB – Thank you! If only I could wear your skull ring.

    Dewayne -YES, it does have a schoolmarm bondage thing going on….sort of monastic, right?! I don’t think I could handle a bun. How about a beehive?

    Samantha -I have lacy tights! I’m not good at smiling for photos, but in person I do smile.

    Honeypants – My highest boots are over the knee. Wouldn’t that be pushing the dom aspect?

    K-Line – I worry about red tights. It seems so color-blocky. I got it from on a day when dresses were 20% off. Sign up for their mailing list!

    Romeo-Could you be any more of a genius??

    Susan -Thank you!

    Miroslav -My goodness, you found your way across the tundra to Godammit?! I cannot wait to tell that Russian bitch that I stole her suitor! I’m sure you were too good for that ugly bitch.

    sleepy – Wow, that would be very Angelina Jolie. Good idea.

    HelOnWHeels -I need shoe help. I’m lost!

    enc – There will be consequences for this.

  19. cybill says:

    You look so good in that dress, it don’t need accessories – but if it did, I think the black stuff is working, maybe some silver shoes instead of black.

  20. And when hubby is sufficiently inflamed and has pealed off your ensemble, for maximum effect shouldn’t he find you accented in lingerie made of rockwool or asbestos?

    Hubba hubba!

  21. Imelda Matt says:

    Since you’d only be a Nancy Reagan size 0 that would be somewhat remiss, don’t cha think?

  22. Stella Mayfair says:

    Since leather plus long sleeves is quite severe, why not go for delicate lace tights and a pair of Givenchy (or Givenchy-esque) open toe shoe boots with buckles. Or do a Vivienne W. and wear some green tartan tights with classic platform pumps 🙂

  23. David Duff says:

    ‘Sister’, ‘Sister’, please, whatever you do, don’t go to Alaska wearing those antlers!

    On second thoughts, don’t ever go to Alaska!

  24. Sister Wolf you look amazing! Not at all fat or drag-queeny.
    I’d wear it with either boots or a nude Louboutin high high heel, and maybe a long pendant necklace with something big on the end.
    I LOVE the dress.

  25. Juri says:

    No, not fat at all and positively superb in that leather dress.

    All women think they look fat in everything they wear so I have constructed a religion that says I don’t have to listen to any of the fat talk anymore, because it’s against my delicate religious feelings.

    As for the accesorizing, I’d better stay out of the game as I only know two colours: black and white, and wouldn’t know what to do with them anyway.

    I do love Romeo’s beehive, though!

  26. Aja says:

    Imelda Matt, someone recently told me that Nancy Reagan had a wide ole’ ass. In most of the pictures from the 80’s, it’s her delicate upper half you see. Not so much of the bottom. Completely off topic, but had to be mentioned.

  27. Oh yes long pendant and ankle boots – for summer the new YSL caged ones (I actually think there will be some useful copies) I also like the idea of christian loubitins in nude!

  28. Louboutin – I’m so cold I’m mistyping!

  29. skye says:

    How did I miss this post?! This is the hottest thing ever in the history of everything. Whatever you wear it with will look amazing, you can’t go wrong.

  30. susie_bubble says:

    I can’t wolf whistle…. but if i did I’d do it to you…hope you don’t mind!

  31. what can i say after annemarie’s recs? she took the words right out of my mouth!

  32. HelOnWheels says:

    Nude Louboutins are a fantastic suggestion. They would soften up the dress. There are several Celine shoes that would look amazing with the dress too.

  33. Sal says:

    A silver chain belt, fishnets, and black patent pumps.

  34. Sister Wolf says:

    Cybil – Silver shoes would be good, thank you!

    Dexter -I’m going to take that as a complement.

    Imelda -When I think Nancy Reagan, I think ‘Adolfo.’

    Stella Mayfair -Two good ideas!

    David -Ha, not with Putin flying around there.

    iheartfashion – YES, a nude high heel would be SO Angie. I love it, thanks!

    Juri -I respect your faith-based position on this.

    Aja – I will pretend you didn’t go off-topic.

    Make DO -I need to find some knock-offs in nude.

    Skye -Wow, what an accolade! I will be quoting you.

    Susie-B -Are you kidding, bring it on!

    fashion herald – She will feel vindicated, in that case!


    Sal -That sounds kind of hookerish. In a good way.

  35. Henk Van Vleck says:

    black and white striped stockings with ruby slippers?

  36. Sister Wolf says:

    Henk, you mean I look like a witch? However could you think that, how bizarre! Unless it’s the long black hair, angry glare, and the drag queen thing.

  37. Zippers at the cuffs? Baroooo.

  38. Milly says:

    Looking over older posts with my 7yr old DD by my side and she points to the first pic of yours to ask if that was your halloween outfit! Kids hey!

  39. Henk Van Vleck says:

    hey, if the pointy hat fits…

  40. sharon heard says:

    Pewter pewter pewter

  41. Heya i am for the first time here I came across this board and I find It truly useful & it helped me out much I hope to give something back and aid others like you aided me

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