All Things Icky II

A few people have cited a certain blogger as someone who would annoy me, so tonight I checked her out. The thing that struck me most was her hideous collection of claw-themed jewelry.

Why the fucking claws?! (Somehow I feel this question woud sound more   beautiful and heartfelt in French but I don’t speak French. Can anyone help translate??)

Now that skull imagery is somewhat passe, the trend has moved to animal skulls. If I see another fucking brass bird-skull necklace, I’m going to strangle someone with it. Bird-skulls, huge claws, talons, just take them all away. Mom of Shoes has a monstrous claw pendent by the ubiquitous Pamela Love and so does every Clueless Goth Kid and tattooed fashion model a la Erin Wasson.

I was so annoyed by the claw-laden blogger that I went to etsy and typed “claw.” Try it! A huge volume of icky claw-things is available, many rivaling Mom’s $700 pendent in stark ugliness. I was particularly impressed by a store called Loved to Death, where I came across these “muskrat mandible” earrings.

And I realized that the blogger girl owns an identical pair!

What is the point in adorning yourself in stupid faux taxidermy? Why do so many people follow these trends? When can we go back to appreciating objects that are life-affirming rather than dead or faux-dead?

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77 Responses to All Things Icky II

  1. Cricket9 says:

    She may be a perfectly nice person, I don’t care what’s her husband age – 19 or 56 is fine with me, but I can’t see how she’s “awesome”. Awesome, really? Is the fact that her husband does something interesting making her interesting as well?
    If my husbands wins Nobel Prize, does it makes me exceptionally smart? Just asking.

  2. Petra says:

    Cricket9 – was that to me?
    I think she’s awesome in that she seems like a cool, fun, nice person who has an interest in things that I also sometimes find interesting (shoes, metal, punk, Phillly) and I would perhaps like to be friends with her. I never mentioned that she’s awesome BECAUSE of her husband – although she must share some personality traits with him considering how she’s married to him.

    Is that okay? Am I allowed to find her awesome now? THANKS SO MUCH!!!

  3. HelOnWheels says:

    Petra – No, you’re not allowed to find her awesome! End of story. Why? Because she’s NOT awesome. She’s not unique. She’s plain, boring, and typical. She just has a great collection of expensive shoes and she’s narcissistic enough to post copious amounts of deer-in-headlights photos of herself. Of course you can think whatever you like of her, Petra. But if you’re unable to have your opinions challenged without thinking of it as an attack you should really reconsider posting here.

    Cricket – Yes. Whatever our significant others do is a reflection of our own brilliance as women! Personally, I take credit for about half a dozen musical albums that various exes of mine released while we were together. WHAT?? I brought food to the recording sessions!! I was an important part of the process, godammit!!! 😉

  4. TheShoeGirl says:

    Pourquoi les putain de griffes?!

    French was my 1st language. Little trivia for you.

  5. erika says:

    Seems harmless…I son’t hate her clothes. It is all samey though.

  6. Anonymous says:

    I think she has no individual style of her own, she simply copies all the Wesson drone bloggers and ends up with a mismatched mess of talons/studs/platform/bodycon. I also find it repulsive that she barely got off drugs before getting pregnant. Glamorizing heroin use, awesome. Or should I say “rad”.

  7. erika says:

    “I also find it repulsive that she barely got off drugs before getting pregnant. Glamorizing heroin use, awesome. Or should I say “rad”.”

    Did she say this on her blog ?? ugghhh – that’s too bad.

    I also Meant to say “don’t” hate her clothes…

  8. Suspended says:

    She looks like the Scottish woman from Ugly Betty; not a bad thing, but she needs to cheer-the-fuck-up.

  9. aimee-WTF says:

    waitaminute. Does this idiot really have a bad tattoo of a chanel bracelet?

  10. Cricket9 says:

    Petra, yes, that was to you; just to clarify – I was curious, not argumentative. You are entitled to find her AWESOME as much as you want, THANKS SO MUCH TOO!!!
    I’ll stick to my opinion that I don’t see the said awesomeness on her blog, that’s all.
    I second cheer-the fuck -up, Suspended.
    HelOnWheels, thanks, I see now that you are absolutely right. I contributed significantly to the advancement of art in Venezuela, development of transport in Poland and teaching in Canada, between other things – yay me! 😉

  11. Cricket9 says:

    Petra, yes, that was to you; just to clarify – I was curious, not argumentative. You are entitled to find her AWESOME as much as you want, THANKS SO MUCH TOO!!!
    I’ll stick to my opinion that I don’t see the said awesomeness on her blog, that’s all.
    I second cheer-the-fuck -up, Suspended.
    HelOnWheels, thanks, I see now that you are absolutely right. I contributed significantly to the advancement of art in Venezuela, development of transport in Poland and teaching in Canada, between other things – yay me! 😉

    BTW, I found that halcoholic reminds us several times: “Once again, I would like to note that I, my husband, and his colleagues and/or friends do not endorse any anti-Christian ideals whatsoever.” Anti-Christian ideals? What would they be? Anyone? She forgot to add “his friends’ friends, acquaintances, second cousins, our cleaning lady, the guy at Starbucks and the girl at the dry cleaners”.

  12. Sister Wolf says:

    Petra – I don’t give a shit about anybody’s washed up metal band husband! She loses 100 points for that, in fact. Stupid shoe whores who get pregnant by old men and endorse Christian values and stare blankly into cameras all day are just not awesome.

    People need to have something to say! Even fashion bloggers!

  13. Sister Wolf says:

    Rad – I’m afraid to go look but I must go, I’m on a mission from god…

  14. skye says:

    Does the coolness by association thing work if the coolness/achievements happened decades before the subject met the cool associate? Should I be getting some credit for my husband’s under 10s football championships from 1978 etc? Is he infinitely cooler due to association with my school surfing trophy circa 1987?

  15. Cricket9 says:

    Sorry for the double post 🙁

  16. RedHeadFashionist says:

    D, every person interested in anything, fashion or otherwise, deserves the right to express their opinion and thus, to blog! They don’t necessarily deserve the massive success of some bloggers, which is why they don’t all have it. But what you seem to be saying is that some people don’t deserve to have an opinion.

  17. A says:

    Don’t read this Hal chick, so when you were talking about Pam Love jewelry I thought you meant this one:
    http://www.whatisrealityanyway.com/

    Good God she makes my asshole clench.

  18. HelOnWheels says:

    A, I hate you for that link!! What an apt description of my reaction too – “she makes my asshole clench”!! Enough of all the brand whores, Wasson wanna-be’s. Bleeecchhhh!!

  19. Angelica says:

    I actually kind of like Halcoholic. She seems trashy in a good way.

    Anyway you guys need to go over to Sea of Shoes and look at what she’s wearing. It’s pretty alarming.

  20. Alicia says:

    Angelica, that jacket she has on looks like a horrible photoshop job.

  21. Alicia says:

    Actually, the whole thing is horrible. EVERYONE GO LOOK!

  22. RedHeadFashionista says:

    Having read pretty much all of Hal’s blog, I can conclude that none of her clothing scares me as much as the fact that she’s about to have a baby with the most decrepit man I’ve ever seen. I know he’s in a ‘famous’ band. (I got well excited because I thought it said he was in Pentacle, but no….) But he’s old enough to be her dad. I judge.

  23. RedHeadFashionista says:

    And if I have to see Wasson’s pinched face one more time I’ll scream. At least Hal’s pout is cute. Ish.

  24. Vanessa. says:

    Gawd, I wish I didn’t go looking for that link.

    She looks like she rolled around in her closet and walked out with whatever hung onto her.

    Why do people find this fashionable? I don’t see it.

    I DON’T SEE IT.

  25. urbain says:

    Pourquoi ces fichues griffes?

    and what about cat bones or shark jaw?

    if you’re not enough sick of it, try to have a look at my blog

    felicitations for your blog and sorry for my poor english

    un putain de français

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