Amal Clooney Challenges Angelina Jolie To A Thin Arms Smackdown

amal-angie-thin-arm-smackdown

Clotheshorse lawyer and handbag hoarder Amal Clooney has issued a challenge to rival Angelina Jolie in the Thin Arms Olympics.

Wearing a priceless vintage YSL gown at the Berlin premiere of husband George Clooney’s new movie, Amal looked every inch the emaciated diva, craning her birdlike neck to smile at cameras, risking injury from the weight of her diamond earrings.

Like Angelina Jolie, Amal was once a normal size but grew thinner with increasing fame. Maybe both women are giving their dinners to their husbands, who are both looking a bit puffy.

In any case, it’s a race to hit zero on the bathroom scales.

What’s the motivation for Amal and Angie? Why are they trying to disappear?

Are they unconsciously emulating the Syrian refugees whose plight has so moved them?

Or are they caught up in a folie a deux?

angie-vs-amal

More important, do you want to see them arm-wrestle?

Me neither.

For a thorough accounting of Amal’s fashion purchases, visit Amal Clooney Style, my go-to source for all things Amal. Keep a calculator handy to truly appreciate the money that goes into being a superstar lawyer, wife, and human clothes hanger.

Angie’s motivation may be more complicated than Amal’s, since she has no problem sporting a pair of massively disproportionate tits. Perhaps the tits are meant to underscore her ‘Mother of All The World’s Children’ delusion.

When I was 14 years old and stubbornly clinging to my anorexia,  I used to sneak the food off my plate into my pocket. Things could get messy.

Someone should check Amal and Angie’s pockets for tamales! It’s just a hunch but you never know.

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11 Responses to Amal Clooney Challenges Angelina Jolie To A Thin Arms Smackdown

  1. Dj says:

    I’m with you sister! What are those toothpick limbs about?? Meth heads? No, not fashionable, ruins your ghostly skin. Bulimia? No, ruins your big ass teeth. Tapeworm? Hmmmmm, divas have been known to swallow them to stay trim. That’s it. Tapeworm eggs can hide in the creases of lettuce and other amoebas in the ice cubes that are served as a side for lunch.

  2. Miranda Mitsouko says:

    Lol! You always brighten my bizarre day. XO

  3. Kellie says:

    The rumour always is that Angelina is on drugs again, and that is why she is so thin. When you get the veiny looking arms, its time to re-evaluate.
    Other thin veiny women- Madonna and SJParker.
    So rich, can have anything, and still want to disappear.
    I don’t understand.

  4. Lindsay says:

    That Amal Clooney site should be filed under – What a Fucking Cunt! She is gross!

  5. Sister Wolf says:

    DJ -EW! You’re ruining my appetite!

    Miranda – Glad to hear it !

    Kellie – It’s the scarecrow scrawniness…let them wear long sleeves.

    Lindsay – She really is, for spending that much money on clothes. She needs to take a rest from that high end shopping.

  6. Blights says:

    Dear Sister Wolf, you are really on fire at the moment, blogging-wise, am so enjoying your posts. So refreshing to read something funny, challenging and intelligent. I must admit to a passing fascination for old Amal, as she apparently went to the girls grammar (selective state – non fee paying – school) Dr Challoners Girls in Buckinghamshire, UK, which is the sister school of the school my boys go to and is nearby….also a barrister friend of mine knows some of the barristers at Amal’s Chambers – none of them got invited to the wedding…to their immense disappointment. Off to check out Amal Clooney style blog now.

  7. Marky says:

    I’d like to meet the members of their teams who don’t mention to them that they look like death. I imagine them all to be less successful versions of Matt Lauer–feckless sycophants.

  8. Sister Wolf says:

    Blights – Thank you for enjoying my blog! I’ve decided to be more productive, starting here. I can see the fascination with Amal’s pedigree. She may have once been an interesting person. Now that she’s an anorexic clothes hoarder, she’s more of an abomination – to me, at least.

    Marky – Yep. Absolutely. Feckless Sycophants should be a band, right?

  9. Debbie says:

    I have always thought Jolie has the weirdest looking arms AND legs.

  10. Blights says:

    Checked out the Amal clothes blog. Amal bedecked in exorbitantly expensive designer clothes while talking to victims of terrible atrocities just does not sit right. Maybe there is a clever argument about using her wardrobe and glamour to raise her and thereby the victims’ profiles…but it all seems too over the top..she needs to dial it down a bit me thinks…

  11. Sister Wolf says:

    Debbie – Now she does but at a normal weight, I didn’t find them noteworthy.

    Blights – She could do her work is a nice DVF dress or whatever. She must have assistants shopping for her 24/7.

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