I was surprised to hear that Chastity Bono is changing her gender. It’s hard for me to give up the idea that Chastity was just trying to get even with her mom. It’s harder and harder to link behavior to psychology. Now we attribute everything to genetics. Good luck, Chaz!
Today I was telling a friend how an old Pearl Jam video aroused my lust for the young Eddie Vedder. If only he would fuck my fucking brains out! She knew exactly what I meant. We wondered if men feel like this 100 times a day. Isn’t that what “studies” say?
I wish I could be a man for a couple of hours, just to know what it’s like. Here’s how I imagine it.
Okay, wow, I’m a guy! This is so weird. Where’s my dick? Is it okay? Is it really okay? Is it big enough? I hope so. I hope it’s bigger than every other dick, or at least not smaller.
Oooh, there’s a chick. Look at those boobs! And she’s got a vagina! I wonder what it looks like! They’re all different, like snowflakes. I have to see as many as possible. How can I get access to that one?
Never mind, there goes another chick. Ugh, no thanks. I hate the fat ones. Take it away!
Hm, that guy has a nicer car. I hope my dick is bigger than his. Is my dick okay? Is it protected from everything? I wish I could feel it right now.
Oh now, my girlfriend is texting me. Why do they always need to talk? Why do I have to listen and comment on every little thing that pops into her head! Christ. This is torture. I just want to go back to what I was doing, but she needs to “communicate.”
I wonder what the score is? I wish I knew which team is ahead. Is there another guy around somewhere? He’ll know. Man, those Lakers! What a game. Too bad the season’s over, though. Wait. Is my dick okay?
I think I’ll listen to some Clapton. Or maybe Coltrane. Boy, another beer would be great. Is my dick okay? I hope so. How can I get a blowjob? I’d give anything….On no. It’s the girlfriend and she wants to talk. She’s ruining the Clapton solo. Damn her. I hope this will end in a blowjob. Is my dick okay?