Who Would You Believe?


So here’s the story. The girl on the right is suing the tattoo artist on the left, claiming that she asked for 3 little stars on her face but ended up with 56.

Kimberly, 18, said she fell asleep while she was being tattooed. What a liar! Even if she isn’t lying, and she is, anyone who’d let that guy near them with a needle is out of their fucking mind.

Here’s another question. Should I have used “whom” in the title instead of “who?” I have no idea. When I don’t like the sound of “whom,” I don’t use it. That’s the rule I follow.

But I came across a blog whose authors are probably very nice girls, where a pair of old photos of Mick and Bianca Jagger is captioned: “how incredible are bianca and mick…I can’t decide whom I like best.” Is this good grammar? Mick, whom do you like best, Bianca or yourself?

In any case, one of the commenters noted:  I think it’s seeing the both of them together that makes my heart race.”

I think this is even better than smitten, or “that sweater stole my heart!”

It makes my heart race when I discover new phrases to bother people with, or rather, with which to bother people.

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25 Responses to Who Would You Believe?

  1. JK says:

    Sister Wolf, attempting mightily to be unpretentious given I’m old enough to have actually had to have had “grammar classes” – and definitely not wishing to find myself in any sort of disputation – with the esteemed Sister Wolf of course, would either “who” or “whom” lend the gravitational linguistic weight that a simple, “What the fuck!!??!”

    Aside from gathering (at first glance) the tatooist’s (in question) expertise, whether he knew 53 stars was two too many, and oh shit, many other things… I’m no lawyer of course, neither a psychiatrist, I simply depend on Sister Wolf’s good commentors to persuade my twelve personalities.

    Then again, I could be both, or perhaps one or the other. I’ve been taking my meds. The only thing I’m certain of is that I wish I’d been born Baptist.

    (I did try, but apparently conversions don’t work.)

  2. Juri says:

    Of course she’s lying! Never trust anyone who wears a belt buckle saying: “sexy”. Deal with your stars Kimberley, and learn to love them, because you’re worth them! Twinkle twinkle, and dance with the stars.

    Also too, it was well done of the Daily Mail to squeeze an evil immigrants vs. innocent natives angle on this story too:

    “I think he didn’t understand what I wanted. He spoke only fractured English and French […] I explicitly said in MY NATIVE TONGUE, French, and also in a little bit of English when he looked confused, that I wanted three little stars only near my left eye.”

    Of course, with a Romanian name and a face like his, the tattoo artist has little hope of being portrayed as anything but the villain.

    There was no mention, though, of the upcoming operation’s possible costs for the British taxpayers through EU subsidies. I think the reporter should have at least hinted at the possibility.

  3. hammie says:

    Well I can see why she closed her eyes while he was tatoo-ing her. What I can’t see is why she went anywhere near him.
    ps. i have had enough bad haircuts where the scissors were way too close to my scalp and yet still I sat there, not to judge this woman too harshly.

  4. kansas says:

    all i can do is laugh.

  5. sam says:

    On some planets that guys a real stunner.
    I wonder what he sees when he looks in the mirror….?
    Can he eat soup?
    How does he blow his nose?
    I cant wait to see him when he’s 70.
    Shes an idiot, but she has youth as an excuse.

    ps. I’m really not judgemental…….

  6. Jill says:

    I wonder what he looks like with all of his various accoutrements (said with a French accent) removed?

  7. Bex says:

    People who say that they fell asleep while being tattooed are fucking liars. And that dude just looks like an asshole.

  8. arline says:

    All I can do is shake my head.

    Sometimes people astound me.

  9. WendyB says:

    I’m angry that no sweaters have stolen my heart lately. Fuck you, sweaters! Try harder!

  10. OMGGMAB says:

    I seriously doubt that moron looked any better without all the tattoos and piercings. For god sake he still looks like a nerd with those glasses on. I’d rather let a rattle snake touch me.

    I think math is hard for both of them.

  11. Mark says:

    She’s 18. Poor thing. While I don’t believe her, I do pity her.

  12. Falling asleep during a tattoo doesn’t seem possible without the aid of heavy drugs. And anyone who would hire that guy for any service probably deserves what they get.

  13. K-Line says:

    Wow – that’s really something. Are we sure that “falling asleep” isn’t code for “totally fucked on drugs”? I can’t imagine you could sleep while someone needled your freakin’ face. But it is mutilation nonetheless. PS – Won’t harass you again (not trying to fob pressies on you!) but pls. email your mailing address to kristinm100atyahoodotca if you would like to claim your prize for providing best “feel good” comment about the ugliest sandals ever. Kxo

  14. ashley says:

    I sat in a chair and watched my brother get his chin tattooed. I saw his jaw. He could not have slept through it. And he is a man with an intense tolerance for pain. I have also watched the judgemental assholes, that have commented on him since. I know who I believe.

    And who, whom? Eeek, I never know for sure!!!

  15. Deni says:

    His energy flow must be seriously obstructed with all the metal he has embedded in his face. Doesn’t he know anything about median lines and points? And his tattoos aren’t even attractive or artistic or unusual; they just look like my doodles when I was taking anatomy class!

  16. Bevitron says:

    You could do it the redneck/hillbilly way and say what one do you believe? Or, what one do you like bestest? (The -est is important.) Or, instead of that sweater/boy/thing which or whom I love, it’d be that sweater/boy/thang what I love. Just a thought. How about, that sweater what smit my heart? My achy-breaky-heart?

    Falling asleep while you’re getting your sensitive face skin tatooed — wouldn’t that be kind of like falling asleep while you operate a pneumatic drill? She could get one of those Phantom of the Opera half-mask things on a stick and that could be kind of cool.

  17. dewayne says:

    i have nothing at all against tattoos, but i am not a big fan of it. face tattoos in particular. having said that, it doesn’t look that bad on her. i’m sure she loves it, and is just going along with this lawsuit so her dad doesn’t think she is a freak.

    the only real problem i have is with her choice of tattoo. stars are boring and overdone. banal, even.

    but one could also say that tattooing as a whole is trite.

  18. Sister Wolf says:

    JK – Sometimes WTF is better than who OR whom.

    Juri – Yeah, I noticed the xenophobia or whatever it’s called, and that belt buckle.

    Hammie – I know just what you mean.

    Kansas- To keep from crying, right?

    sam – I agree on all points.


    Bex – Check, and check.

    arline – May you and I remain astounded.

    WendyB – HAHAHAHAHA!

    OMGGMAB – Imagine being his mom.

    Mark – I’d pity her if she didn’t have the belt buckle, maybe.

    Iheartfashion – Yes.

    K-Line – Thank you, I really want my prize!!!!!

    ashley – It does hurt. I used my Lamaze breathing technique.

    deni – At least there isn’t a swastika up in there…or I think there isn’t.

    Bevitron – I think the stars are kind of cute, even though she’s a liar with a tragic belt buckle.

    dewayne – It is played out, yes. And yet I may be gearing up for another. I plan to stay awake.

  19. Am I the only person who is obsessed with the who/whom element of your debate.

    Basically the who is reserved for peeps – so the person you quoted is rubbish and being pretentious by using whom. If your choosing between people it is who do I like best as the who directly relates to the subject matter the people concerned.

    Whom is reserved for objects so had the pretentious one said ‘I love the jacket Bianca is wearing , whom else could pull it off’ then they would have been correct as whom relates to jacket, wearing and loving.

    As for the tatoo matter oh well for whom the bells toll hey!

  20. Jill says:

    Me too Sister…it’s one of the only French words I can say well while spitting on you!

  21. Sister Wolf, I’m in agreement with the who/whom — I can never for the life of me remember the correct way to use it, so I use my gut and if it sounds right, then I do. But now that Make Do Style has described it above, I’ll be on top of my grammar!

    As to the story, first thing I thought of when I read it was that she had to be off her head on some great drugs to fall asleep during a tattoo. A FACIAL tattoo no less! I had one done some XX years ago (why tell? again I’ll blame it on lack of estrogen, I’m feeling old and crap) on my inner thigh. Hung over. It felt as if the tattoo artist had a six-inch dagger and was carving that sucker out. Because the artist was a friend of a friend, we hung around all day waiting for my turn (so he could give me a deal on the price.) I watched grown men cry over much less, in much tougher/thicker skin areas. The xenophobic angle makes me sick. Today someone sent a xenophobic comment to me on facebook due to my last name, assuming I was foreign. Fuck xenophobes!

  22. Braindance says:

    I once went into a tattoo shop owned by Fat Bob in 2000, and asked him to put some tiny dots just under my eyebrow. I nicked the idea off Star Trek, the girl/alien on there had them under both eyebrows.

    He said No Braindance, 94% of people with facial tats have psychological problems with them later in life, just keep doing it with the liquid eyeliner.
    Thank you Fat Bob, as I do still do the dots with eyeliner, and am very happy not to have them 24/7.

    Fat bob is not all sweetness and light though, when he pierced my belly button, ( I was young, took it out 2 weeks later as it is just strange) he flapped my t-shirt real high and looked at my boobs. I said to Fat Bob ‘You just looked at my tits didn’t you?’ He shrugged and said ‘Yeah’

    Swings and roundabouts…

    My grammar is appalling, as is my spelling, always astounds my friend for she knows how much I read and study, yet I have no grasp of the English Language, she calls me her well read retard.

  23. Queen Marie says:

    So of course she was lying! has now confessed that she asked for the stars and absolutely loved them. Until! Until she got home and her father freaked out. So she decided it ‘would be best to just say I fell asleep’. My oh my…

  24. Anyone else been seeing the leg tattoo that’s just a line going up the back of the entire leg, a la seamed hosiery?
    And I’m not sure what’s worse, the belt or the tattoo.

  25. howdy, I am having bad luck trying to rank up for the words “kokomo dentist”… Pls approve my comment!!

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