Help, I’m On Empty

Here is the truth: Tonight, I just hate everything. Not so much hate, just don’t give a shit.

I want to be interested in something but nothing worked. I don’t give a shit about who wore what to the Met Gala. I certainly don’t give a shit about Lady Gaga or the Sex and the City movie. I’m too depressed by World Events to dwell upon them. I looked at fashion and felt that it’s being covered better elsewhere. I looked for new Whores With Blogs  and discovered that Roomy has lost her bloom and the What Is Reality girl just flounces around with the Jizz Girls.   It has all become so incestuous, lately!

A bunch of Second Tier Whores With Blogs  have posted the usual mood boards and photos of Daul (“RIP!”,) Kate Moss, anyone who is blond and holding a cigarette. They’re all boasting about some stupid wedge heeled boots by Jeffrey Campbell or Sam Edelman ( I TOLD you they are Second Tier; they can’t afford Rick Owens or even Acne.)

The girl at Luxnoir is still chunky and in love with herself. The Dirty Flaws girl shows a photo of a weird chain gag in someone’s mouth with the title “Yes, Please!” I get that she’s Dirty but why do these girls need to work so hard to emphasize their Darkness? Why can’t they just get their entire bodies pierced and covered with cigarette burns and Sanskrit tattoos and get it over with? Gnarlitude is still Stoked by all the radness and Fuck Yeah-ing over everything.

Since I’ve wasted all this time, Let me introduce the Model/Whore above, who really really loves herself and seems like reason enough for Roomy to either blow her brains out or find a new direction entirely.

Sorry. I failed. Maybe tomorrow.

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43 Responses to Help, I’m On Empty

  1. annemarie says:

    What i kind stand about everyone you mentioned, but especially the model/whore (thanks a bunch for making me click on that) is how PUNK they think they are. I wish John Lydon could go and spit in each of their faces. Fucking assholes.

  2. Ann says:

    I see nothing wrong with a little apathy. Giving a shit is totally draining. I don’t have a blog, but I have to imagine writing about the things you give a shit about is even more exhausting. Some days you just can’t.

  3. Withering contempt is a valid and essential emotion.

  4. Bratty Duke says:

    I wish these girls were even half as interesting as real whores.

  5. skye says:

    I just don’t understand why none of them can ever shut their mouths. Open mouths in every photo. Unfortunately that chick “Risko” is australian, we have a whole fleet of open-mouthed wannabe wasson type poseurs on the loose down here. They are depressing.

    Not sexy, just really dumb.

  6. mutterhals says:

    Looks like I’ve wandered into the bitter broads section of the internet. I better get going, I hear misery is contagious.

    I was almost knocked dead by the claim that writing about shoes and pretty girls is ‘exhausting’. Good one!

  7. Faux Fuchsia says:

    Sister Wolf you sound tired. Could it be time to plan a holiday?

  8. Braindance says:

    Dr Braindance prescribes: food, (of the naughty but nice variety) wine
    & funny friends

  9. the real andrea says:

    Have no fear, SW. Even young Tavi is out of inspiration. It must be the blogger flu. You’ll get better, I’m sure of it.

    All the best!

  10. Liz!! says:

    Seriously, that SRC (I keep wanting to type “SCR” aka Security Council Resolution) blog chick even WRITES like Rumi, in that stupid hipster babbling prose.

    Not giving a shit is lots of fun. I hunker down with my memoirs of Stalin’s Gulag and realize that nothing else matters except for genocide and poverty.

    And then I read Roomy’s blog. And steam comes out of my ears.

    A vicious cycle. I wish that I could stop giving a shit permanently!

  11. Helen says:

    I love you Sister W.
    Even when you don’t give a shit (know the feeling) your pen (keyboard) is sharper than anyone else’s.

  12. dust says:

    If you would give a shit about those blogs, I’d be worried. They do appear to be on a lazy side lately though, they don’t even provoke a hate, underachievers…

  13. enna. says:

    So a skinned muppet + underwear + ankle boots = chic, now? Somebody alert Jane.

  14. Angelica says:

    I just posted a couple of days ago about how I stopped giving a shit about “fashion”, and I was talking to my friend the other day and she feels the same way. A lot of people seem to be out of ideas and super repetitive lately. Maybe it’s time for a cultural paradigm shift.

    I totally agree with Annemarie about the PUNK thing. Since when is dropping huge amounts of money on dumb overpriced shit for “hipster cred” considered punk? I wish Ian MacKaye could go spit in each of their faces…or at least give them a stern talking-to.

    Also, I swear Rumi has been posting the same outfit for the last three weeks.

  15. Joy D. says:

    I think sometimes it is good to cover all bases. You’ve seemed to have done that here. I am really lout of inspiration. I posted the Kesha opening of the Simpsons..funny but kind of lame. Maybe it is time to go back to basics.

  16. erika says:

    I’m sick of everyone else’s stuff too, It’s good though it is pushing me to want to make more of my own.
    yup boring, time to step away from the internet.

  17. HelOnWheels says:

    SW, you seem to have tapped into a mass fashion & blogger ennui. See? You DID do well! I’m feeling uninspired and bored as well. The best I’ve been able to muster has been “Meh” looking at collections and my own closet. So, I’m funneling my inspiration into the nifty nail colors for spring. Tiffany Box Blue, anyone?

  18. What about the fucking fields? That is every single photo I see on every single fashion blog. Whether is it someone gushing over some topless 18 year old model with blond hair and hay in her mouth, or they themselves frolicking in the grass. Oh, and don’t even get me started on the Erin Wasson worship. Barf.

    One more gripe – the selling of fake sex and black metal. If you’re not anal rimming every other night, please don’t act like jizz nail polish is the coolest thing on Earth. Anddddddddddd, if you cannot tell me the best albums by Burzum, Watain and Satanic Warmaster, I don’t want to see your sideways/upside cross.

  19. Anonymous says:

    Please address this Halcoholic mess. When did looking like an extra from Drugstore Cowboy=fashionable. I weep for her future child.

  20. XuXu says:

    she looks like she’s pooping.
    isn’t pooping fun?
    i just love me a good solid poop.
    especially when everything’s so
    fucked up in the world. nothing
    like a good shoe poop pose to
    make things just feel, idanow,
    turned around. ya know?

    ya know?
    (gun, or something, to head, mine)


  21. Trashforce says:

    Yeah, that Luxenoir girl sure is chunky!

    Thank God I’ve never posted a picture of myself on my blog. People would throw up on their keyboards.

  22. Alicia says:

    I see no fail here, Sis. I think they’ve run out of ideas or have milked whatever category they’ve made up for themselves.

    LOLs @ “Second Tier Whores With Blogs”

  23. arline says:

    XuXu made my day. Still laughing.

  24. aine says:

    Ahh don’t bandy terms like chunky around, thats just shitty. But hope you feel better soon, and helonwheels tiffany box blue sounds like the best colour

  25. damaia says:

    You’re missing somebody vital from the hipster/goth (gothster?) scene:

  26. To be honest I think you’ve hit the nail on the head or are ahead of the game.
    When I feel like this I do a rubbish cheery post about nothing – you’re more honest and astute!

  27. I’ve just discovered your blog, but I think I love you. It’s ridiculous how much I identify with this post, which is probably insulting to you since I’m both chunky AND prolly, say, a twelfth tier blogger. Screw it, I’m unworthy of numbers. Put me on the z-list and call it a day. Jeffrey Campbell? Ha! I bought the knock-offs by Aldo on Amazon and painted designs on them. I wear those bad boys with handmade leggings (that I dyed and “deconstructed” myself) and pale green toenail polish that I mixed at home because there’s punk and then there’s… PUNK, DAMMIT.

    *drops the mic*

  28. rebecca says:

    Rebecca prescribes a trip to the Olympic spa, where you can soak and steam and sauna for $15. And if you really want to splurge then you can have a little old Korean lady scrub your entire body into smoothness for an extra $30. It’s not luxurious or anything, but it sure helps me :). In fact, I just talked myself into it.

  29. I can’t even function after reading this — I just laughed my fucking ASS OFF!!! Even during your “off” days, you are rocking my world. I love you.

  30. E says:

    The Luxenoir girl isn’t chunky, but compared to all the anorexic airheads she’s Beth Ditto. Size questions aside, her blog sucks, her clothes suck, and her writing efforts are paltry at best.

    I love a good hate fest.

  31. E says:

    Also I hate the word “Luxe”. Everyone who says it should get an automatic punch in the ovary.

  32. theresa says:

    aww come on sister wolf. we 20somethings have to half assedly express ourselves somehow! and now its not even pissing you off?? I’ll try to think of something quick because if its not pissing you off, its not worth doing!

  33. Andra says:

    Nobody gives a shit about any of this crap.
    It just took you longer than some to figure it out.
    None of it is even slightly interesting or of any importance.
    Nobody gives a fuck and that’s that!
    I feel better already.

  34. Leslie H. says:

    I keep forgetting Rumi exists until you remind me.

    I miss Daul too, but these people are ruining my private mourning for me. Why can’t they keep their opinions to themselves?

    For the 2nd tier people. Yawn, yawn. Trying too hard.

  35. Aja says:

    I think we got over blogged. Once everyone and their mother got in on the action, it got kind of boring, redundant and hard to keep up with, I guess. Yes, everyone wants studded wedges, ripped boyfriend jeans, and whatever other trend is super hot. And yes, I’ve lost interest in Sex and the City and the movie hasn’t come out and yes, I’ve lost interest in a lot of the things I overly consumed myself with a few years ago. And yes. It feels great. I’m finishing books. I’m decorating my house. I’m writing in my journal again. Every day after work, I go for a long walk around the lake with my Mum. I’ve become detached from the blog-o-sphere and I effin’ love it.

  36. Cybill says:

    Can we come up with a theme for you for the week? How about – things I love week, Advice week, Old photo week, Annoying cliche week ?
    Have you visited this site yet it may amuse you and ‘a laugh is as good as a holiday’ (see I started annoying cliche week already).

  37. thoroughly slayed, as always.

    thank you, SW.

  38. kate says:

    It’s all so camp-hilarity, though! If you were the gay man that you should be, then you’d be loving the hellish decadence of all of this. But forgive them, they don’t know the wisdom of menopause even though their periods have all stopped from low-caloric intake, except that fatass, fecund Luxenoir!

  39. Dru says:

    My internet blows for a day, and I missed this? Damn!

    It’s rather unfair of you to snark about Luxenoir’s weight, Sister- surely absolute slenderness is not one of the criteria that outfit bloggers must conform to? I used to visit her blog about a couple of years (and a couple of her hair colours) ago. Couldn’t really get into her style, but came off feeling mildly grateful that not every fashion blogger out there was some teenager with thighs like a giraffe.

    And I find it impossible to hate Rumi, because the blogger I remember in my head is still someone who wrote about how weird it felt to be the only half-Asian kid in town and liked 90s fashions when every fashion sheep was still over at the 80s altar. It’s the plethora of her clones that I find annoying (like the one above).
    As for Daul…I know it’s been almost six months, but I’ll miss her still. Model existence notwithstanding, I think she’s the kind of girl you might have liked.

    PS: don’t worry, Sister, your mojo will come back. Mine’s gone too, so I’m kind of waiting on the same assumption.

  40. Mary says:

    The crab girl needs to die screaming with sharp things in her head. That blog is beyond vile.

  41. Dru says:

    ^ seconded re: the vileness. I should technically owe you a grudge for putting that link up and causing me to go over there….my eyeballs and I are going to go recover from it now.

  42. Iron Chic says:

    I was just in Montreal for 4 days and I only internetted for like, 5 mins a day and I didn’t answer my phone. And the world didn’t fall apart, amazing!
    Also, I want to move apartments now to get away from my free cable tv.
    I know I could just unplug it, but I won’t. I think you probably spend too much time on the computer like I do.

  43. Elle says:

    Speaking of bloggers you might hate, check out Hallie at Halcoholic. Nobody knows where she gets the money to buy all of that ubiquitous designer stuff she wears, but we all know that she does the best vacant expression, second only to Barbie, and looks vaguely smelly as she crouches in doorways and on curbs. She’s also married to Bobby Liebling of Pentagram… this creeps me out intensely. I’d love to know what you think of this phenomena.

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