I would pay $1,595 for these shorts if ___________.
Jen Kao at Shopbop.
Lookin’ good, Gooney.
If someone reimbursed me $2000. And then I would promptly decorate my table with them.
If I started shitting money.
Honestly, that is the only way.
… I had bad taste and a sugar daddy.
I were insane.
… if i believed tacky-ass wings could become avant-garde (but still tacky)
if I had a lot of spare money, and needed a table cloth and some napkins.
Let’s face it, if somebody insisted you take a very large bag full of $ 100 notes and the deal was you have to buy and wear these pants you would think about it long and hard.
And then bargain the price down to something in the order of $ 5.85.
But you would only wear them at night and in the dark and only for a very short time.
And come to think of it, probably only a person doing short times in a dark place would wear this garment (I use the term ‘garment’ loosely).
my life depended on it.
Terry Richardson left the fashion “photography” business and photographed tree frogs in the Amazon instead.
if I had very expensive taste in toilet paper.
you threatened that sweet dog who lives across the hall.
Jesus, those are ghastly! And the sad thing is, I have to close this window before my stupid husband sees them and tells me I should make them in latex.
I was an asshole.
…..had lost the plot.
I got so caught up in your previous post and then wrote another comment, I completely forgot about these shorts!
So, I would spend $1,595 on these lace peplum shorts if I could charge it to Charlie Sheen
I was running a Ponzi Scheme…..
I would pay $1,595 for these shorts if John Galliano was made to wear it with a sign round his neck that reads: “I’m an anti-Semite”.
…there was no kleenex left in the world and it was either blow my nose or die.
OMG, The Attack of the Doilies!!!
I were brain dead.
I had starved myself, apparently. Only available in sizes 2 and 4. Darn it!!
If I could have the body that comes with it. Hello legs and flat tummy!
Shopbop: where the lace trend goes to die.
If I got to dance at the folies bergeres with other french cancan girls wearing them in different colors.
I worked all day around midgets who had a serial sneezing condition.
I wish I’d been quick enough to get in on the last post, but alas I’m much too late and now feel like I should just let it wane. Anyway, I still commend you for writing it and stirring up a lively debate.
…if I had to construct an Icarus-like set of wings and attach them to my butt.
…if I was allowed to cram them up my nose at the first sign of a nosebleed. (Allergy season is coming!)
I were Jane. I need it to be worn with Ann D boots and one of vintage leather skirt in the little collection of leather I’ve been curated so far.
…if I could wear them with the flowery heels featured several days ago – to complete the nuttiness.
…I were out of maxi pads with super absorbent wings.
I would pay $1,595 for those shorts if I was being paid $3,190 to wear them. Once.
it was the dawn of a zombie apocalypse. These would fool zombies into thinking there was no brain left in me to feast on.
Ouch! Ouch! Ouch! My eyes!!!! 🙁
I agree with Sarah-Rose. Those are my terms, too.
I like them!
No really. I do.
I don’t like them to $1,595 extent, but, I’m not sure I like anything that isn’t a house or house furnishing (in my dreams) to that extent.
…they came with Johnny Depp as my sex slave.
I like the shoes, they are cute.
… those big ass pockets were filled with Charlie Sheen’s boogers. POTENT stuff. Killer street value.
. . . if long Johns weren’t cheaper – and warmer.
. . . if my fatass could fit in them.
I’m with Chelsea Rae. Johnny Depp sex slave…that’s the only way.
Or….a newly discovered island off the coast of the US, conveniently named ‘Tea Party Island’ by the Native Americans, where all the asshats can go to start their own country and subsist solely off the nutrients of their own ignorance? Yeah, I’d wear stupid shorts or anything else if it’d kickstart that alternative-reality future…
I had the legs to go with them.
you gave me a lot of money and let me cut the frilly peplums off.
They wouldn’t be ‘lace peplum shorts’ any more, but I’d be able to show my face in public with relatively little embarrassment.
…OR, you let me wear a jacket on top that’s long enough to cover up the frilly bits.
…if i cant afford to buy that bell sleeve jacket by jane.
ugh. looks like a lacy nappy. fail
…doing so would bring about world peace.
…I needed a new lace doily.
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