Shoes to Kill For

The ‘Dovima,’ an 11cm, spike-heeled confection of gilded silk mesh and jewels, is embellished with a pair of rose pink-dyed, taxidermy birds with gold and crystal heads. Sound good so far? How about this: They incorporate   “semi-precious stones, jet, satin ribbons, silk chiffon, diamanté and crocodile skin fashioned into dainty rosettes.”

These shoes by Bruno Frisoni for Roger Vivier are hand made and cost $43,000. A little pricey but wait! The shoes “can be inserted into and buckled onto matching crocodile or snakeskin protective ‘platforms,’ based on the ‘pattens’ of the Middle Ages. They add height and save the expensive, fragile works-of-art for the feet from actually making contact with the pavement.”

Fuck!

Now that I’ve seen these shoes, nothing else will ever be good enough. It’s the fucking birds that get me.

Around 30 years ago, I was out with my sister, waiting for a table at our neighborhood cafe. A tall man in front of us was wearing white shoes that he’d obviously spray painted. On each toe cap was affixed a little doll head. My sister and I exchanged a look, and I said to the guy, “Nice shoes.” He smiled graciously and said, “I call them ‘Babies in the Snow.”

I’ve never forgotton about Babies in the Snow. I think I’ll call the Dovima “Dead Birds With Bling.”

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11 Responses to Shoes to Kill For

  1. hammie says:

    Dead bird on shoe? aren’t you supposed to wipe them off when you come inside the house?
    xx

  2. annemarie says:

    Dude, these shoes are so epic. They are the perfect recessionista statement shoe. When I have spent my last cent I can eat the birds. I die.

  3. WendyB says:

    I’m jealous that I didn’t meet the Babies in the Snow guy.

  4. dewayne says:

    i have a pair of brown vans that are atleast five years old that used to be the only pair of shoes i wore, outside of work or fancy occasions. they are thoroughly worn, but not yet holey.

    they are, however, holy; a friend and i performed the catholic ritual for house blessing on them, with holy water.

    it may not quite compete with “babies in the snow,” but my nasty house shoes are instruments of god.

    is there a market for old shoes? believe me, they aren’t just any old shoes. they have been through a whole hell of a lot of insanity, probably saved my life more than once.

  5. I love the idea of babies in the snow even better than these.

  6. I love it that you started a paragraph with, “Around 30 years ago.”

  7. HelOnWheels says:

    I fear these shoes may make the wearer more likely to contract bird flu.

  8. Would it be wrong of my to try and construct a replica for my own pleasure? Would it just leave me feeling empty and hollow that they were not the real Mona Lisa of shoes? Or perhaps like your “babies in the snow” man, I can just take inspiration and let it fly.

  9. Sister Wolf says:

    Hammie -Not when they’re Bedazzled.

    annemarie – bananas!

    WendyB – I wish you’d been there!

    dewayne -Would you consider having them bronzed? Or maybe just spray-paint them gold and then mount them on wood, like a trophy?

    iheartfashion -Yeah, they were the Real Deal, so to speak.

    grrlie blather – Haha! Wait til I get to “40 years ago…”

    HelOnWheels – I like to think they disinfected the birds.

    super kawaii mama – YES, please do it!!!

  10. Mark says:

    I love ‘Babies in the Snow.’ I don’t care what the guy looked like, I would have blown him for coming up with those shoes.

  11. Ann says:

    I wonder what the rest of Babies in the Snow guy’s closet looked like. I bet he dressed better than that Rumi chick!

    Those Dead Birds With Bling shoes make me the slightest bit uncomfortable. I do like the idea of a protective platform to keep your dead birds off the pavement, though.

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