If you’ve always felt uneasy about disliking Lena Dunham, today she has given you license to go ahead and find her repugnant.
You don’t have to struggle with your looks-ism or whatever else was holding you back.
She’s an annoying self-obsessed idiot. She’s not gonna guilt-trip me into giving her a pass.
I can’t stand her. (Say it along with me if you want.)
Her newsletter Lenny is a primer on everything bad about millennial feminism, and her writing in Lenny is an excruciating mix of baby talk and pseudo-academic gibberish.
Be that as it may, today she published a chatty interview with one of her many best BFF’s, Amy Schumer. I won’t speak ill of Amy Schumer, because duh, we lover her.
They are discussing their mutual disappointment with the Met Gala, where they sat at the same table and felt out of place, being too hip for the room etc. :
AS: I left so early. When did you leave?
LD: I attempted to grind my ass on Michael B. Jordan for an additional twenty minutes and then left right after you.
I was sitting next to Odell Beckham Jr., and it was so amazing because it was like he looked at me and he determined I was not the shape of a woman by his standards. He was like, “That’s a marshmallow. That’s a child. That’s a dog.” It wasn’t mean — he just seemed confused.
The vibe was very much like, “Do I want to fuck it? Is it wearing a … yep, it’s wearing a tuxedo. I’m going to go back to my cell phone.” It was like we were forced to be together, and he literally was scrolling Instagram rather than have to look at a woman in a bow tie. I was like, “This should be called the Metropolitan Museum of Getting Rejected by Athletes.”
I don’t know who Michael B. Jordan or Odell Beckham Jr are, but they have my support and sympathy.
I gather that they are black, and that they have broken some law by not wanting to hook up with Lena Dunham.
On the one hand, she doesn’t want women to be objectified but on the other hand, she’s mad if they’re not. Men are objects so that’s fine.
On the one hand, she like to show up at red carpet events looking as aggressively unattractive as humanly possible – horrible dresses that wouldn’t look good on Miss Universe, barrettes in her hair like a 6 year old – but on the other hand, you’re a fucker if you’re not smitten.
I know it’s overkill but let me cite this exchange for emphasis:
LD: The other thing that I get really crazy about is this new world in which women aren’t just supposed to be protected from actions, they’re supposed to be protected from language. Women are so strong. My ovary has basically exploded in my stomach twice, and I was pretty chill about it. You think I can’t listen to some short comedy loser say something dumb about rape?
LD: I’m not going to cry, I’m a fucking queen.
NO YOU AREN’T!
Shut up already and leave everybody alone! You’re just not helping.