As you probably know, Sea of Shoes is very busy getting ready for Christmas, and she even helpfully explains that “Thursday is Christmas Eve, Friday is Christmas…” The girl is sharp as a tack, you have to hand it to her.
She also offers an awkward English translation of an article about her in Elle France, called ‘A Day With Jane.’ It’s a delightful account of Sea’s high-powered life, which revolves around her daily “blog duties,” and of course, her mom. She confides that her school was too conservative for her, too Texas. The biggest surprise is that the Sea household is without a TV. Mom and the girls have to watch old episodes of ‘Dynasty‘ on a computer!
What is more disturbing: That this family actually does take its fashion cues from Dynasty, it wasn’t just a mean mental judgment you were making? Or, that they don’t own a TV?
Here is your opportunity to leave a comment for Jane. I will go first.
Hey, Sea! I am worried about that mole above your ankle and I want you to show it to your dermatologist. I don’t want to scare you but it should probably be removed, just to be on the safe side. xo SW
P. S. Tell Mom or Dad to get you a TV. People dress so different now! You’ll love it!
Really? Dynasty?!?! Joan Collins dress so much better (I liked most of her blazers but I loved her character in Dynasty) than the sea of shit family! Crap! I didn’t know that it’ll be Christmas on Friday…thanks for the reminder =)
Those shoes are gorgeous though…mostly because I love ladybugs!
Jane, you look curiously cute in your ‘80s bug outfit — I remember those knickerbockers the first time around and they’re really flattering compared to, say, ripped jeans. How refreshing it is to see a young lady dressing like one. You might like to check out the vintage curious bug bangles at ShopCurious — or how about a quirky (though perhaps too reasonably priced?) papier mache ladybird bag to match those fab shoes.
Some might find the fact that you are a little different from the mainstream difficult to process — like not having a TV, not allowing comments on your blog and spending oodles of what is probably your parents’ money on unnecessary clothes and accessories. I’m not quite sure what your talent is, apart from being a pretty kid — but at least you’ve given some of us the opportunity to think about what’s really important in life. I guess you can afford to go on living like a spoiled child in a cocoon regardless of what anyone else thinks — and, sadly, many people will continue to be jealous.
If you make any donations to charitable causes, it might be a good idea to mention this in your blog (especially at Christmas). If not, Sister Wolf can provide a list of worthy recipients.
Dear Sea of Shoes, one day you will turn all Alexis and push Christal (your mom) in the pool. dump the boyfriend for a Dexter look a like and perhaps move onto the Colbys next year…
Dear Sea
Your ladybug shoes are adorable. Hopefully they don’t hurt like you say some of your other pairs so. And I hope you have a nice birthday.
I don’t own a TV either (and I don’t miss having one). But you are American and would probably have automatic access to Mad Men if you did own a TV so I do think you’re missing out on a good thing there.
However, what I sometimes wonder about is how on earth you’re going to live without your mother if you plan to move to New York for college. Or will she move with you?
^I meant, “like you say some of your other pairs do.”
I can’t really get behind Sea’s 80s obsession (more a 90s girl myself), but whatever. If she likes it let her dress that way.
I have a TV, but never watch it. The only thing that gets me in front of the screen is BBC comedy.
Dear Jane, if you don’t own a TV cos you needed money for shoes, than what’s the next to save/make money on, kidneys? I wouldn’t watch Dynasty, not for ALL shoes in a world, no! I’ll rather sit in silence in dark than look at that trash.
Dear Sea,
College is going to be a bitch.
I don’t have a TV, and I don’t want one.
I waste plenty of time on the internet.
I would like to know the opinion of her school mates… could be interesting to know what “too texas´” kids think about her…
Anyway, Jane, dear, why the fuck does someone spend loads of money on shoes that are way to big? are you that stupid, that rich, both or just taking the piss??? Your podiatrist will adore you really soon, as you will become the best patient ever if you go on pretending to walk with the expensive torture machines you normally buy.
Merry Christmas and wonderfull New year to you, Sister Wolf, and all the people that read this blog. (Thank to Jane that I know the date, or my poor European brain would never noticed all the fucking lights adorning my hometown)
Sil
Dear Jane – thanks for reminding me about Xmas and that I need to hit up the mole doctor, too. And don’t be taking that Dy-nasty fashion too serious, k?
http://forums.thefashionspot.com/showpost.php?p=2087778&postcount=10062
that is all
Jane – thanks for the tip off about Christmas. I, like, totally forgot or something…
To totally change the subject: SW, is this one of yours. It was found on Craigslist, best of:
I think it’s time for a worse swear than “cunt”. It used to be that was the absolute top of the swearing hierarchy. You could stop any discussion just by flashing the joker of all swear words. I mean… wow. Cunt. it’s got two hard consonants. Not only that, but they are at the beginning and at the end. Come in with a crash, go out with a bang. And the ‘u’ gives it that really short syllable sound. See, the word “fuck” is similar, but it’s just too undecided. First off, it begins with sort of a foo foo sounding letter… fffff, I mean what’s that? Then as far as the meaning, well it’s just not focused enough… could be a noun, could be a verb… you can combine it with other words, there’s just no direction. Make up your mind. Now… “cunt”, there’s a word that knows exactly what it’s trying to say. It doesn’t need a context. But now everyone’s on the cunt bandwagon, and it’s just not the same anymore. There isn’t that thrill of “ooohhh, who’s gonna top that?”. It’s just mundane everyday now. We need something that can be applied to anyone, an equal opportunity word like fuck or cunt but worse. Cuck? Nah, that’s too much like cock. What about Funt? No, that just sounds like gay football or something. So, anyway, if someone’s got any ideas… run it by the rnr panel of judges, and we’ll let you know if yours is a winner. For now, let’s slow down on the usage of cunt… like antibiotics. And don’t forget to wash your ass.
Please forgive if not yours, but it so sounded like something you would write . . . or am I 180 degrees wrong?
As someone who was born in New York….I HAAAAATE that everyone dreams to escape to New York. So, Jane, that’s like -1 on my mental scoring of SoS. (I took about -9999999 away the day she talked about a Tibetan man’s cool steampunk glasses from a Natl Geographic magazine)
Number 2, about you leaving school. *I* think you’re weird. Everyone thinks you’re weird. What, is your mother going to take you out of life now?
Seriously. I had a similar problem that she does when I was 17…I was quite intellectually mature for my age, and had friends in my 40s (well, as close to friends as you could be at that age). However, I was still stupid enough to think that I knew everything about living life on my own. My parents sent me to therapy and I cried and begged the therapist to get me out of high school, away from the stupid, immature brats.
She refused, and two years later I discovered that they are in college too. And the workforce. Hell, they are even 20 years older than me. And you want to escape, Jane? Good luck. Morons are everywhere. And yes, some of them are CONSERVATIVE TEXANS.
She did talk about not having her license and having to rely on everyone for her rides…which I can totally relate to (STILL do not have a license!). So, I’m giving her the +1 back. Don’t sigh in relief, Jane. You still have to make up for the National Geographic comment.
awww Jane. I LOOOOVE that you use the word “pantaloons” instead of “lame ass pants that look like sweats with crappy bows tied at the end”, they sound so much more expensive if you say it like that. Saying “pantaloons” also makes you sound like a bitch.
Re: TFS posts, some people might have a nice festive giggle looking at this:
http://forums.thefashionspot.com/f63/anna-wintour-out-vogue-soon-72618-post5107683.html#post5107683
Sorry, this probably makes it clearer:
http://forums.thefashionspot.com/showpost.php?p=5107683&postcount=85
*liz* oh yeah!?
lady bugs are cute. no matter how you cut it.
jane’s still materialistic. spends too much money.
what else is new?
nothing.
merry christmas, ass holes. have a good one.
LOL @ all these great comments. I truly love this blog.
Merry Christmas- Happy Jew year.
xox
Merry Christmas to you too, Asshole Theresa 🙂
And to Liz, nothing quite like being broke and living in NYC to make you want to strangle the dreamers (speaking from experience of course).
Those shoes are at least 2 sizes too big for her. I know she loves to dress up in Mom of Crud’s clothes, but she’s going to end up with gnarly old claw feet trying to walk in too big shoes.
MOC is parading today in ‘lapin’ = rabbit fur! Pretenious nonsense. She’s a feckin joke.
jane please go back to real school with real teachers and classmates. Though some of them may not love you like your blog fans, but in school is the real world. It’s too bad you’ve been introduced to internet at an early age. Get out from your mom’s bubble from time to time jane. I know you’re sweet to each other and all, but that’s so creepy. So creepy. Taking each others photos everyday? And Carol cooking for you? Wow, Carol is my favorite fairy tale character then.
I really find it odd that she’s super best friends with her mom. Is that normal?
Oh crap now I have this going through my head:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Xr8vUTm64h0
xx
“EITHER BUY SHOES THAT FIT OR STOP WEARING YOUR MOTHERS FUCKING SHOES” cries HRH the DQOS.
it’s all so weird.
it is! Jane is OK in my book. been reading her blog since it started. I can’t hate on her, she’s really young. have you seen her other blog (“they don’t call them lovers in highschool leeland”)? it’s linked on SoS. nearly all images. it seems like she is actually pretty weird in a good way and she finds all this out-there creepy stuff for that blog. but unfortunately has been dragged into high fashion where people have to put up a front.
Please don’t remove the mole, it’s pretty and adds character. I think you only need need to worry about it if it has hair growing out of it. Eww.
I’m sorry my translation did not live up to your high linguistic standards!
If I’d known you would be analyzing it I would have made more of an effort and improved it a little bit. I promise it won’t be as poor next time…
Dear Jane,
On the note of SW’s concern for your mole, I’ve just had a mole on my chin removed for the very reasonable price of £130. That’s English money. That’s relatively inexpensive, but I bet you could get it done cheaper via Ebay. It was quick and painless, but I did have to have a plaster on my face for a week. Think of the opportunities, Jane! I bet Chanel do plasters! And considering how much you spend on the rest of your wardrobe, it would be criminal to not get the most blinged-out plasters that you could possibly find. Or wrap the wound in a McQueen scarf.
Love RedHead
Hey, you know that Godammit, I’m Mad! » Blog Archive » Comments For Jane 12/23/09 is the best blog on the internet right? Love reading it!