Family: Part II



Great news! We received this nice email today from my very special sister:

To be clear, I am taking my position as Trustee very seriously, just like a real job within a business.  With that in mind, I keep track of every minute, mile and expense regarding the Trust and will reimburse accordingly.  I will be charging $50/hr and break down my time in tenths.  
With all that said, I encourage you to contact me or my attorney with very specific, straight forward questions and/or concerns so as not to waste anybody’s time and consequently, money from the Trust.

Isn’t that nice? We get to pay her just for asking a question about our share of the trust! What would Jesus do?

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28 Responses to Family: Part II

  1. Suspended says:

    Jesus Christ! Please try not to kill her…the temptation must be irrepressible!

  2. Romeo says:

    Jesus didn’t need money because he had magic and people would just give him stuff. This is why he’d say your special sister is a cunt and then go about his business of getting free meals and foot massages: he could afford to. Judas turned him over to the Romans because it was Jesus’ turn to pick up the tab at the last supper and once again he refused to pay even for the tip.

  3. Jessie K says:

    Oh my god, I feel for you! That email is seriously scary.

  4. Okay, I know as executor of a will you do get paid (my husband was advised of this as he was his father’s executor), but the gall to ask you to direct all questions to the lawyer! My husbands siblings just asked him, its kind of a no-brainer. But perhaps your sister has no brain judging from this. I would be fuming as well. Want me to hex her ass? I’m damn good at it! Love you and please try to keep the stress levels down, this is the last thing you need. XXX

  5. D.R. says:

    Irrelevant what He would do. What is SW going to do? That is the question.

  6. Cricket9 says:

    $50 per hour? Based on what qualifications exactly? Why not 49.90 or $500? Also, “keeping track of every minute, mile” etc. is time consuming – are you supposed to pay her for this too? I’m sorry, SW, your special sister is, without doubt, a cunt.
    Maybe JC could drive the demons out of her, or maybe there is nothing to do – because it’s just her sweet personality, no demons involved.

  7. Emma says:

    That is beyond fucked up. That is beyond the beyond. That is beyond the beyond the beyond. Cold hearted. A soul that already left her body for the underworld and only a shell remains.

  8. Kellie says:

    Are there millions at stake here? Se is acting like the leader of a Fortune 500 company.
    How the hell do these weasels pull the wool over people like this?
    She is seriously nutso.
    Be careful Sister.

  9. Andi says:


  10. Lynn says:

    I think Jesus would let her stew in her own juice.

  11. Sister Wolf says:

    Suspended – Oh no no no, I feel nothing but tenderness and compassion, as per people who do not harass or threaten others in a cyber-type manner.

    Romeo – Good to know.

    Jessie K – It will probably get better too!

    Jet aka – She is not gifted in the brain department, lovely and nice though she is.

    D.R. – “Fight fire with fire” is one strategy.

    Cricket9 – Hahahahahahah, the charges may well be infinite, I Didn’t even think of that.

    Emma – YES!!!!!

    Kellie – HAHAHAHAHHA, I will be quoting your Fortune 500 crack for years to come!

    Andi – Yep.

    Lynn – Well, I don’t know. His Ways are mysterious. Or maybe that’s god I’m thinking of.

  12. JK says:


    Aside from how much the fee is – how’n Jesus’ name are we siblings?

    (An early life it is true, I lived in California. Was “Dad” in the Navy?)

  13. JK says:


    I didn’t click the embedded before I asked. Mine must be a “Spam Sister.”

  14. When you think about it, $50 per hour sounds very reasonable. It’s very considerate of her to keep her invoicable time at such a moderate rate. You and your siblings should send her messages of thanks. Although, would she charge you for reading them?

  15. jlynn says:

    So now she’s pretending she’s an ADULT human, with a serious position, like a real job, within a business.
    Since she’s not MY sister, I can summon just the tiniest drop of pity in my ocean of disdain. After all, what happens to a girl whose identity is totally wrapped up in being daddy’s tennis-playing eye-apple when there’s no more daddy? My guess is that she’ll draw out the trustee process as long as possible, not just for the power-trip and the hourly fees, but for a connection to the time when daddy’s favoritism actually meant something. Pitiful.
    If she’s as incapable of emotional bonding as she seems, she’ll never feel the gut-wrenching grief of loss, but if she persists in alienating people by acting like a cunt, sooner or later she’ll feel the constant ache of a boring, solitary life.
    By the way, I’m sorry for the pain/aggravation she causes you with her fuckery…

  16. jlynn says:

    PS: maybe it’d be worth $50 for you/your siblings to contact her with 60 min worth of VERY specific questions (What font are they using on the documents?) and concerns (Did the attorney spell my name right?), or maybe thirty 2-minute phone calls asking “Is it done yet?”, so she can really FEEL her trustee status.

  17. Sister Wolf says:

    JK – Calm yourself, my dear.

    Madame Restora – Yes, she would.

    jlynn – Oh god. You’re giving me chills. And I like your suggestion. I would enjoy those 30 phone calls but we are NOT ALLOWED to call her. NO phone calls accepted.

  18. David Duff says:

    Families – heh! I thank God there was only ever my mum and me.

  19. Lynn says:

    I like jlynn’s term, “eye-apple.” Very nicely put, that.

  20. Sister Wolf says:

    David – A good reason for gratitude, I now see.

    Lynn – ME TOO, jlynn rules!

  21. Marky says:

    Stunned. Really.
    There’s a neon sign in my brain and it’s blinking “OXNARD” incessantly.

  22. Sister Wolf says:

    Marky – If only.

  23. ali says:

    A JOB requires people skills…

    At least she has nice hair.

    In other news, my boyfriend from Dallas is visiting the homeland right now. He didn’t have anything to do today…so I told him he should go to Dolly Python, SNAG me a present and SNAP A SHOT of dolly picking her nose. No kidding, he already scoped out dolly python a few days ago (not knowing that I even know what it is) and found nothing for me.


    The bitch sister can BURN.

  24. You will all have to take a vow of silence & one of you will need to screw the attorney

  25. Sister Wolf says:

    ali – Eeoow, I’m sorry he had to go inside that awful place.

    Make Do – If by ‘screw’ you mean ‘have sex with.’ the attorney is a woman. I don’t think that either of my brothers could face the horror.

  26. Debra says:

    Jesus wouldn’t do anything because he already knows there is a special place in hell for dear Sister and her $50.00 fee.

  27. Aja says:

    Jesus . . .

  28. Eek says:

    Sweet Jesus she is obnoxious. Wow. Why did your father choose her?

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