Here’s What Sister Wolf Wants


It’s my birthday, hooray for me! I would like these 18K safety pin earrings, set with black diamonds.   And I feel that they are longing for me, all the way from Browns in London. Someone stupidly priced them at $3,000, so I’m going to be strong and live without them. For now.

Here’s what I want in lieu of the earrings. I’d like everyone to say stuff like “Happy birthday, you old bag!” and “Haha, you’re that much closer to being 60!”

I would also like someone to think of a new word I can use. I just got an email from Target, announcing a newsletter for “frugalistas.” God, no. Recessionista is bad enough.   What would be a good word for someone who complains about fashion? A Negativista?   I’m sure someone out there could do better.   I’m a little “on my meds” right now. Help a Sister out.

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37 Responses to Here’s What Sister Wolf Wants

  1. Stella Mayfair says:

    a super happy birthday to you, sister! i won’t call you names, not even on this momentous day. but i hope and wish that you stay this wonderfully cunty and fukken sicccc!

  2. Braindance says:

    Happy birthday to you, happy birthday to you, you look like a monkey, and you smell like one too… A traditional English taunt for you there, the passive aggresive Brit in me could not hold back
    Sincerely though, many happy returns, I hope the your life is filled with cake and presents and booze. And if all the people in your life are too frigging selfish to purchase those saftey pins for you, rest assured, If I was rich, I would get them for you. Jesus, you think people could go without eating for a month or so wouldnt you? Same shit happens on my birthday, never the diamonds, just the love. Wankers.

    Frugalistas sounds like some kind of itchy fungle infection that inhibits the wearing of peep toe shoes.
    How about “Googlewhishta”? For that is what I do when thinking about fashion porn.

  3. WendyB says:

    Happy birthday, you cuntavista! ™

  4. Jill says:

    Happy Birthday you Hot, Sexy, Raven Haired, Ruby Lipped Chica!

    Er, I’m sure you can find a blog somewhere with some chick touching her face…killing it with a sick DIY project showing just how you, yes you, can make those safety pin earrings. Wait a minute…sounds like a perfect post for Sister Wolf! The Howling Tauntress of Fashion Bloggers the World Over.

  5. arline says:


    I suck at picking names for things, my creativity seems to avoid that area.

  6. TobiLynne says:

    Happy birthday!

  7. JK says:

    Happy Birthday my Friend, and many thanks for things … most among them what neither of us ever expected – the ramifications of an 11 year old girlchild.

    Two other things, well maybe three (HelOnWheels listening?).

    Anyway, Sister Wolf I wish I could buy you what you want at any time, but Mr. Wolf has communicated with me thry surreptitiious means – so I can’t buy you that pair of horse foot shoes.

    But when I say “Happy Birthday to Sister Wolf?”

    That is heartfelt. And the appreciation never known.

  8. deja pseu says:

    Happy Birthday!!!

  9. Winter Bird says:

    Happy fucking birthday you acid washed avogueanato!

  10. aube says:

    No! A bouffonista!
    Happy birthday vieille peau, you rock!

  11. Queen Michelle says:

    HAPPY BIRTHDAY SISTER WOLF!!! You’re totally killing it!! xx

  12. jools says:

    Darling Sister, Happy Birthday! Take picture downtown and have somebody make them for $600. Cheers!

  13. Style Spy says:

    Happy Birthday. Hope your birthday gives you the blowjob.

  14. Andy R. says:

    Guess who I saw last night going into a club? Lindsey lohan! And guess what! She looks awful! Super skinny and coked out and pale!You look great! Therefore, I prononce you a new media star Tm! Happy birthday!

  15. Ann says:

    Happy birthday to my favorite divatista!

    I personally give 2 thumbs way up for WendyB’s suggested word, cuntavistaâ„¢. That’s just good family fun.

  16. OMGGMAB says:

    Sister, I am saying a rosary full of Happy Birthdays for you with a Hail Queen of Fashion thrown in at the end, just for the hell of it. Enjoy your day. I raise a glass to you and toast your new age, you beautiful bitchivista.

  17. minzhi says:

    Happy birthday to sister wolf!

    but i’m afraid that a pair of $3000 earrings is not something i could afford..

    how about this breathtaking t-shirt from Christopher Kane’s new collection? or this amazing I’m a Rock Star Leggings from LaRok? you will look wonderful in these.

    cuntavistaâ„¢ is great. cant think of anything greater than this.

  18. Lauren says:

    Happy Birthday to my big Sister Wolf!!!!!

  19. andrea says:

    Happy Birthday!! As my Jewish grandmother used to say “you should live and be well!”. In lieu of the earrings, why don’t you celebrate by going to see “The September Issue”. Good movie for an antifashionista like yourself, and will provide much material for your blog. I truly hope you have a wonderful day, you old bag!

  20. Queen Marie says:

    Another year, another step closer to geriatric…

    Is that what you’re looking for?

    I would much rather say Many Happy Returns Dearest Sister Wolf.

    With much love

  21. Happy Birthday you gorgeous thing! May this be your best year yet…

  22. Alicia says:


    And I’m on the floor at WendyB’s “cuntivista.” LMAO

  23. Deni says:

    Happy, happy Birthday Sister of the Pack. My b-day wishes for you: continue to run wild, at times alone and at times with the Wolf pack; may happiness be your constant companion, to live long enough to see your grand kids as teenagers and your grown kids dealing with those hormones; and to enjoy a huge, dark chocolate cake with a strong cup of coffee tonight (if not something more delightful – use any of your bloggers’ imagination and you won’t go wrong). Don’t sweat the earrings, something much more wonderful, creative, unique, and fun will come your way.

    I can’t think of any new words today or tomorrow or the next day but maybe after that (hey, with all the interruptions, phone calls, co-workers, and work, how is a girl to think — yesterday it took me over an hour to type “I love your blog.” Don’t people know that somethings are sacrosanct and they shouldn’t interrupt my blog reading/writing time? Oye vey, some people have no sense of priority or propriety).


  24. Iron Chic says:

    Frugalista?! I now have a new enemy.
    Happy Birthday!

  25. Bevitron says:

    Happy Birthday, Cuntessa! (Sounds better than Happy Birthday, you Old Cunt! Although, that does have a ring to it. Ha ha, I just realized how that sounds!)

    Anyway, have a great one! In the short time I’ve visited here I’ve tremendously enjoyed you and your style and sensibility and that of all the cuntmmenters who hang here. Plus, I’m learning all kinds of shit about fashion and stuff that I never paid attention to before.

  26. HelOnWheels says:

    Happy Birthday, ya old fabulista! As my dad says “Another year closer to incontinence and dementia. Enjoy!”

  27. K-Line says:

    I’m trying to get it up to call you an old bag, but you are too gorgeous (sorry). I hope you have a terrific year. Remember: 60 is just around the corner! 🙂

  28. Imelda Matt says:

    Happy Birthday.

    Don’t forget to pack your emergency Depends…one can never be sure when the next sneeze or coughing fit will remind us how old and incontinent we really are.

  29. Gnar Jen says:

    If I had to, I’d be claiming Negativista or Nihilista.

  30. Aja says:

    Happy birthday you old cunt! I adore you.

  31. Juri says:

    Happy birthday! I might otherwise buy you the safety pins but you’re still too young to wear them. Let’s wait until you’re seventy.

  32. Jimmy P says:

    That’s enough soliciting, Sister W. – and what’s with the negativity? I say chin up, you old tart… or have you had that done that already? can’t tell from the photos, you delicious diva.

    Haven’t got a new word for you but here’s a delightfully depressing mantra suitable for oldies’ anniversaries and these times … “another day, another dime; another year, another yearning”

    must go now… i can feel a leonard cohen moment coming on and must look for the vinyl.

  33. dewayne says:

    what they said. belatedly.

  34. Sister Wolf says:

    Stella Mayfair – Haha, thanks!

    Braindance -You’re the ONLY one who sang me the monkey version!!

    WendyB – “Cuntavista” sounds like a new Microsoft Windows!

    Jill – I want those fucking earrings or even one of them!

    arline – Thank you!

    TobiLynne – Thanks sweetie pie!

    JK – Big (married) kiss to you across cyberspace.

    deja pseu – Thanks!

    Winter bird – Ooooh, great word!

    aube – Haha, thank you!

    Queen Michelle – Pot calling kettle!

    jools – Will you come with me??

    Style Spy – It did, thank you!

    Andy R – Wow, was she freckly too??

    Ann – I love you but my bladder wants an apology.

    OMGGMAB – To bitches!

    minzhi – Don’t think I haven’t longed for those awful sequin l——s!

    Lauren – Thank you, little Sis!

    andrea – HAHA, thanks, back at you!

    Queen Marie – YES, that’s it!

    Iheartfashion – Let us both have an easier year, xo

    Alicia – Thanks and let’s hang out, independently!

    Deni – Thank YOU beeyotch, xoxo

    Iron Chic – You can never make enough enemies!

    Bevitron – HAHAHA, thank you for being here xo

    K-Line – Hahahahha, oh god, 60!

    HelOnWHeels – Now you’re talking.

    Imelda Matt – Don’t make me laugh without my Adult Protection.

    Gnarl Jen – Oh, Nihilista is a good word. You’d better TM that in a hurry.

    Aja – Thank you and ditto!

    Juri – It’s a date. xoxo

    Jimmy P – “You old tart”…I love that, I’ll bet Vivienne Westwood answers to that. xoxo

    dewayne – Thank you my dear, Better than never. xo

  35. JK says:

    I love you too.

  36. slownews says:

    I am dying for the little silver safety pin studs at Shopbop. Could those suffice? many happy returns!!!

  37. ambika says:

    Happy belated birthday!

    I saw ‘frugalista’ in a magazine the other day and just cringed. Awful, awful word.

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