If It Walks Like A Slut And It Quacks Like A Slut, It’s Melania!

melania slutty 1

Melania Trump is mad at The Daily Mail, Politico, and eight other news outlets for reporting that she once worked for an ‘escort agency.’

Her lawyer – the same one who represented Hulk Hogan in his lawsuit against Gawker media – has put these websites on notice that they will be sued unless they retract the unsubstantiated report.  Because it could harm her sterling reputation, for one thing. Here’s how he put it:

All such statements are 100% false, highly damaging to her reputation, and personally hurtful. She understands that news media have certain leeway in a presidential campaign, but outright lying about her in this way exceeds all bounds of appropriate news reporting and human decency.

I’d like to start off by asking if it’s okay to slut-shame Melania Trump. Is it okay? Because she’s pretty slutty.  And I don’t see why she should be or pretend to be ashamed.

She’s a slutty nude model from Slovenia who was willing to do what it takes to come to America and make money. Not every woman could succeed at this. Most can’t, in fact.

Melania nude by Alé de Basse­ville 1996 max magazine

Be proud, Melania!

She met The Donald at a party thrown by some guy who runs a modeling agency and enjoys entertaining big-shots who like sexy gold-diggers. All fine with me!

Unfortunately, Melania has lied about having a college degree and she lied about her immigration history and she lied about writing her own speech at the GOP convention.

And we’ve just learned that she lied under oath in legal proceedings related to some shady skin-cream she was selling.

So I’m going to say she’s a slut and a liar.

Why can’t a lying slut just go about her business strutting around in her Loubs, squinting and frowning and trying to become the First Lady?

Let her reappropriate and embrace the term ‘slut’ just like Amber Rose, who isn’t nearly as slutty as Melania, IMHO.

I hope her feelings aren’t too hurt. But I’m not convinced she’s a good arbiter of “human decency” because, you know, her husband.

Meanwhile, Mr. Trump has promised that Melania will hold a press conference to address the rumors surrounding her immigration.

Oh please, as if.

 

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3 Responses to If It Walks Like A Slut And It Quacks Like A Slut, It’s Melania!

  1. Marky says:

    Cannot wait for the press conference. Will she take questions? Or will she just read another plagiarized speech–perhaps something by Vanessa Williams?

    And what was going on in my life when the lesbian porn surfaced earlier this month? How am I just learning about it now? What’s wrong with me?

  2. Suspended says:

    Vanessa Williams….hahaha. Yes, she should take something straight from the script of Ugly Betty. I might find a slither of liking for her if she embraced the absurd with humour, for a change.

    Sis, I love that her and Donald are sharing hair dye.

    Are there any Youtube tutorials for learning to quack like a slut? I feel it’s something I should master.

  3. Dj says:

    She’s quacking all the way to the vault…

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