Is Sarah Palin a Man?

It’s November 2, and Mrs. Palin has failed to produce her medical records.   “We’ll let you know when we have something to say,” Palin spokeswoman Maria Comella said on Thursday. On Saturday, Comella had no comment when asked about it by ABC reporter Kate Snow.

Here are the top five reasons mentioned by bloggers who wonder what the records are hiding:

1) She had a tubal ligation procedure after 4th child
2) She has only given birth to four children
3) She has had an abortion
4) She has had plastic surgery
5) She has had an STD

But wait! WHAT IF MRS. PALIN IS REALLY A MAN!

Think about it. Loves to hunt and kill animals. Dresses like a drag queen (sorry, drag queens, I’m talking about a really style-challenged white-trash drag queen!) No maternal instincts. No breastfeeding. Overly aggressive. Lives with a submissive hunk.

Godammit dot com, that bitch is a fucking man. No wonder she can’t release those records! And no wonder so many men feel inexplicably drawn to her…..

PAP Smear members, what do we think?

We are very near the end of a long, excruciating road. We’ve laughed and cried together. Soon, we’ll know whether some of us have to move to Canada or Iceland. We may never know the meaning of life, but we know without a doubt that Trig isn’t Mrs. P’s baby. And also too, we will never be able to think about Valentino without cringing a little.

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24 Responses to Is Sarah Palin a Man?

  1. Imelda Matt says:

    That’s where the $150K was spent – on hiding her hairy nut sac!

  2. David Duff says:

    “Is Sarah Palin a man?”

    With the sort of British pluck that is famous the length and breadth of, er, Britain, I am prepared to step forward with a stiff upper lip, if nothing else, and do my duty and thereby scotch this disgraceful rumour. It’s a crap job but someone has to do it, and I’m certain Mrs. Palin will be delighted because I think her failure to respond to my many letters, written so tastefully in green ink on pink paper, is merely due to the intense pressure of saving America from Hurrican Obama.

    Of course, when she is installed as President-for-Life all you liberals will be rounded up and dumped in the Alaskan tundra where the delicious Sarah, dressed in furs and toting an array of weaponry that would put Delta Force to shame, with me, still stiff-lipped at her side, will conduct the greatest manhunt ever seen. I can see it now, me caught on film standing proudly erect (stop sniggering!) with one foot on the carcass of Al Gore – just think of the money I’ll make with all that blubber!

    Well a man can dream, can’t he?

  3. sleepy says:

    I’ve thought for a while that there is a definite hint of Adam’s Apple about her throat area.
    Sarah ‘The Shim’ Palin.

  4. Sister Wolf says:

    Hahahahaha! David, you are beyond help! Let us keep all this from your wife, okay?

  5. Sister Wolf says:

    sleepy -And the square jaw, why haven’t I noticed it before?!

  6. Juri says:

    When she had her operation she should definitely have done something to that Adam’s apple as well. Why didn’t the RNC use some of the $150 000 and send her to Thailand? Their plastic surgeons are pretty darn good and those Bangkok ladyboys could have given some her some pointers on how not to be a he-woman. Besides, she could have learned some entertaining golf ball and cigarette tricks to replace her flute solos and that pageant walk.

    But what about Todd? Is it unfair to think he was born a woman? His lesbian goatee looks exactly like the ones that every post-op butch grows when the testosterone kicks in.

    I think the entire Palin family should release their records, but even if they won’t, it’s only a matter of months before some of them breaks up and talks to a tabloid. My quess is it will be Levi or Bristol.

  7. And still Kurt Russell remains silent…

  8. sleepy says:

    She has the same jaw line as Buzz Lightyear.

  9. dewayne says:

    to infinity, and beyond!

    oh no! what if she’s secretly post-op tim allen? and if she is, how did she stop grunting and mumbling unintelligibly about “more power”?

  10. annemarie says:

    Kurt Russell!!! hahahahahahaha!

  11. enc says:

    This is the best theory I’ve heard so far. It’s really undisputable.

    I’m just on the edge of my seat waiting for tomorrow.

  12. Mark says:

    Hairy nut-sack. Wow. I love it here on Godammit.com.

    Everyone needs to spend the day knocking on wood.

    Thanks,
    Love,
    Mark

  13. Wordsmith says:

    Oh jeezzus….is hairy-nut sack a clue?!

    Now this – this is an aspect I had not imagined.

  14. Danielle says:

    I am SERIOUSLY curious how much longer this skank can stay in the news after Obama wins tomorrow. She’ll probably admit that Trig isn’t hers, just to get more attention (and to draw attention away from the fact that she is, indeed, a man, baby!).

  15. hairy nutsack, green ink on pink paper, Kurt Russell, dying!
    she’s definitely a man, baby. that explains Todd A LOT.

  16. Oh my gawd the square jaw! You’ve nailed it and yep Valentino is so off the shopping list for ever if the bitch gets in. Even so it will take a while.
    I’m going to be on my knees now for 24 hours.

  17. Bex says:

    Hahaha that’s awesome!

  18. honeypants says:

    I’m sorry, I couldn’t comment on this, because I <3 Transfolk, and it makes me sad that you’d insult them by insinuating that the Cunt was one of them.

    Anyway, I just wanted to say I was very happy to vote this morning! Yay!

    Yesterday, the AFLAC lady was at work signing up those who want additional insurance, and she told a co-worker (who is a VERY liberal Jew) to go read Revelations so he can see exactly why Obama is the Antichrist. Seriously. I thought it was bad enough when she saw my Obama pin (she obviously didn’t read the PAP Smear one, ‘cos she didn’t ask) and she said “OH! You’re voting for Obama? You WANT to lose your 401K?” Dude, It’s already dropped by over $4000 thanks to the recession. But yeah. People are psycho. I can’t wait to plant myself in front of the TV tonight!!!

  19. honeypants says:

    HA! That same liberal Jew co-worker just got back from knocking on doors all morning in Hollygrove (the neighborhood of NOLA where Lil Wayne is from), and he said some old black man was crying and said “I never thought I’d live to see the day when a young white man came knocking on my door to tell me to vote for the young black man.”

  20. Mark says:

    honeypants–Your second story is the best one from this entire election. I’m seriously a little choked up. This election has brought out the best and worst in people, myself included.

    Please please please report that rancid cunt from AFLAC.

  21. sleepy says:

    Honeypants… I’m with Mark.. You broke through my British Reserve with that.
    Played the Reserve card there not wanting to step on David’s ‘Stiff upper’ and all that!

  22. Sister Wolf says:

    Imelda – Hairy Nut Sack = pure poetry.

    Juri – Yes, my friend. Todd was born a woman.

    Nick – Alas.

    Sleepy – but more manly!

    Dewayne – To Oblivion and beyond!

    annemarie – Hahahaha!

    enc – Not that we don’t love a tranny.

    Mark – xxoo

    Wordsmith – Believe me, I’m surprised too.

    Danielle – She’ll give Trig to that consignment shop she loves so much.

  23. Sister Wolf says:

    fashion herald – What will Todd do now that we’ve outed him??

    Make do- THANK YOU, I hope you have a cushion under those knees.

    Bex -It IS!

    Honeypants -I’m sorry! I love you!

    Sleepy -Sleepy, you are a credit to Buckingham Palace.

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