Is There a Stupider Cunt?!

People, what is there to say? I know we are all still feeling hung-over from the “debate.” By now we all have discussed our favorite moments with friends and loved ones. The winks and nose-wrinkling. The doggone it. The Say it ain’t so, Joe. The kitchen table was invoked so often, it should have been allowed to have its own podium.

And what about the Castro Brothers? I have never heard that term in my life. The Castro Brothers? Did Grandpa make that one up for her? Was she really trying to say The Coen Brothers? Didn’t they make “Fargo,” where she got that accent from? Am I on to something, people?!

Let’s redouble our efforts to bring down this loathsome imbecile. Someone will have to research the entire Coen Brothers catalogue, to see if there are more code words we are missing.

Also, we need someone to compile a glossary of Palinspeak. “Maverick” clearly means “nuts” but I’m a little shaky on the rest of it.

We need to find out where Palin’s top lip went. Where the hell is it? I see the tattooed lipliner, yes, but where is the lip itself? Did she give it to the Pig, or is that something else? Help me, people, I cannot do this alone.

When Biden got all teary eyed, Mrs. Palin was like a block of ice. From that good state of Alaska, so near to Putin’s rearing head. A colder woman would be hard to imagine. I think she verified her steely heartlessness when she was finally passed the family mascot, poor little Trig, who was somehow sound asleep. She hit him on the back, over and over, even though sleeping infants DON’T NEED TO BURP! She finally succeeded in waking him up, the better to show off his little “Special Needs” features.

This bitch must die. I’m not advocating violence, no no no no. No sirree bob, heck no. But neither am I waving the white flag of surrender. When I say she should die, I am merely giving a shout out to the third grade. Hi, kids! Extra credit if you kill that mean Church Lady!

What was I saying again? Oh, never mind, I don’t have to follow a format, I want to speak directly to the people. People, would you like to see me keep on fighting this fight, or would you rather see more diversity here? I believe I used to have more on my mind. Perhaps I should try to access that other area of my dwindling brain.

*Also, you can now reach me at if you need to contact me. If you want to be on my blogrolll thing, let me know.

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31 Responses to Is There a Stupider Cunt?!

  1. Sonja says:

    by all means, you must keep fighting the fight, this is no time to diversify – but you’re preaching to the choir! I want to ask your choir what they’re prepared to do to make sure that Grandpa and Devil Church Lady Cheerleader Beauty Pageant Runner Up Winking Barbie Doll Lying Faker Bitch don’t get elected??!! It’s a serious question.

  2. MIchelle says:

    Hey there – I love your blog! I do a program on Australian public radio (equivalent of NPR) called Hair of the Blog – and I try to have a chat with a different blogger from around the world. Love your Sarah Palin thoughts.. can you come on??
    It’s Sunday morning our time – which is Saturday afternoon / evening yours.
    Can you please email me at with your number if you’re happy for a 5-10 minute phone chat into the program.

  3. angela says:

    Oh my, oh my. I was sure I would explode when that mean church lady started talking about how she was tolerant toward gay people but did not, oh no, personally no, I do not support marriages that are gay, not between a man and woman? personally no. But really, I did explode when she started saying things like “I’m so encouraged to know that we both love Israel!!!!” and “Jesus saves! Abortion kills” “My baby is retarded-look-because I don’t like abortion”. Sister Wolf, I commend you on your work against this rancid stinking whore-bag without an upper lip. If there is anything I can do to assist you and PAP Smear I surely will.

    United in our hate for Palin,

  4. Sister Wolf says:

    Angela, great to hear! Annemarie (our chief political strategist) will give you an assignment. We can’t survive too many more of these explosions!

  5. Juri says:

    “How about the job she did ehhehhhehhh…Viva La Barracuda ehhehhhehh”

    What the hell is happening to Grandpa? Seriously, I know he would have to force that fake yellow smile of death on his face and praise the Mom, even if she had gone totally blank and fainted on stage – and the crowd would be cheering, but still. This is scary.

    Can’t his family make an intervention before his dementia goes completely out of control? Is Cindy too doped up to notice or care? Can’t the Castro brothers give him a call and ask him to join their Mambo band. They could tour on Caribbean cruisers together as a trio.

  6. We need you on the frontline Sister Wolf. You have the most cuntish power and you need to use it wisely. We are counting on you to keep us focused on the end goal.

    The tour of duty is nearly at the end so keep going and keep feeding Annemarie her strategic mind is imperative.

    Mind you what a lovely kind general you are – your jacket for Charponnaise was blissful. You see mean church lady couldn’t be so generous not least because she wears trash but she doen’t even understand the principle of giving….

  7. OMGGMAB says:

    Sister Wolf, we need your guidance and strength to keep fighting the good fight. If nothing else, we need to keep informing those who actually will say out loud “I think Sarah held her own in the debate” that appearances are only skin deep. If i scratched her stupid face with my fingernail, a big black hole would open up and we could all see her empty little head! I really am more amazed at the number of people who will blindly follow a Church Lady who believes that a witch hunter predicted her governorship. Are we living in a country of total morons?? Why ask, the answer clearly is “DUH!” Depressing yes, but we must press on.

    On a lighter note, I can see Michigan from my house, does that qualify for palintriotism? Let me call NORAD and let them know I’m scanning the air space for them. . .

  8. WendyB says:

    That’s a great email address.

  9. enc says:

    You look like pure evil in that photo!

    I contend that no one who toes the Republican party line can ever, ever, ever be a “maverick.” That is a misnomer.

  10. annemarie says:

    Dear Angela,

    PAP Smear would like to offer you the position of Minister for Propaganda. We realize that this is an infrequently heard of job title these days, but we at PAP have every confidence in your ability to not only meet the requirements of this position, but even to rival and surpass the fine performance of Dr. Josef Goebbels.

    This reference is intentional– we at PAP love Israel too, and we have reason to believe that Gov Palin is a lying sack of shit. Therefore, your first mission will be to expose this cunt as an anti-semite. Your target audience is Evangelical America.

    You might also want to probe Israel for gay rights activists and pro-choice groups. This will confuse her.

    Go forth and destroy.

    Heil Sister Wolf!

    Chief Political Strategist, PAP Smear.

  11. annemarie says:

    Dear Patrick H,

    PAP Smear is concerned by your recent bout of absenteeism. We would like to inform you that it is simply not permissible to take any more of your vacation days at this time because, as you know, we are now hitting our busy season and need to have the full force of our staff behind our mission.

    Please contact us soon. If you do not, you may find your job in serious jeopardy and come home to find your cat or whatever other household pets you have in the broiler.

    PAP Smear HR

  12. annemarie says:

    Sarah Palin’s mouth is grotesque. Perhaps she wore her upper lip down because of all the cock she sucks. Of course, Patrick H could tell us for sure, but he has not showed up to work in a long time.
    Patrick H, if you are out there. Could you please explain the absence of SP’s upper lip? Did excessive practice of fellatio indeed erode it into oblivion?

  13. annemarie says:

    “How about Sarah Palin last night? Uh! Uh! Uh! Uh! Uh! Uh! Uh! Uh! Uh! Uh! UHHHHHHOOOOOOHHHHUUUUGH!!”

    72 year-old men should not have orgasms as strong as this, and certainly not on national TV. Their hearts cannot take it and neither can our stomachs.

    I hereby declare Sarah Palin to be a danger to aging GOP slobs up and down the country, whose tickers are not in the same shape as they used to be.

    We must stop this winking, wiggling whore as soon as possible! We must stop her cynical use of apple pie expressions such as “doggone it” which are deployed for the sole purpose of reminding geriatrics of their first fuck in a chevy (“Doggone it John Boy, that’s a big ‘ol cock you have there!”) more than half a century ago. She must prey upon the vulnerable members of our society no longer!

    Heil Sister Wolf!

  14. Sister Wolf says:

    Annemarie, you’re killing me. I shouldn’t be laughing so hard this early in the day. David Letterman made a montage of Mrs. P winking, and it was perfect! Asking people to stop making fun of her is just un-American. They hate our freedom!

    Angela -Get going!

    Patrick – Don’t make us come and get you.

    Juri – We need Grandpa to stay alive (I think) so Mrs. P wont become the Presidential nominee and then win the sympathy/I want to fuck a sexy librarian vote!

    OMGGMAB – You can see Michigan?! That means you’re an expert on the US auto industry.

    Make do -It’s a nice jacket isn’t it? I am not JUST a cunt!

  15. Skye says:

    Nah – SP is the stupidest cunt of them all (so liberating to type that word, since I am banned from saying it now that our toddler is mimicking everything we say).

  16. Honeypants says:

    This site offers Palin Bingo cards! It might be useful for whoever is going to compile the glossary.

    annemarie, you continue to crack me up, and SW you can’t give up the fight! We’ve only got 4 weeks to go. All our efforts are needed.

  17. PatrickH says:

    I’m too busy dancing to the Castro Brothers! I’ve always loved their music!


  18. OMGGMAB says:

    Get out the bubbles and my spanish english dictionary!

    Patrick are you dancing with Rickey Ricardo?

  19. annemarie says:

    Patrick, that is unacceptable! This is your last warning! If you don’t get back to work immediately (first task: explain SP’s lack of upper lip) we will take DISCIPLINARY ACTION!!!

  20. annemarie says:

    Sarah P! Calling Sarah P!
    Do you think Palin has been fucked in the mouth so many times that her upper lip has become ingrown? Back me up here!

  21. OMGGMAB says:

    Get out the bubbles and watch the Castro brothers on Ed Sullivan.

    Patrick, are you dancing with Ricky Ricardo?

  22. OMGGMAB says:

    Okay, sorry, I’ve been Palinizing too much and didn’t realize that both my comments were posted. Goshdarnit, johnboy! Please don’t excommunicate me, Sister Wolf!

  23. annemarie says:

    OMGGMAB, you are a senile zealout! Heck, you could be president!

  24. OMGGMAB says:

    Annemarie, give me a couple drinks and I’ll lead with a swagger!

  25. Honeypants says:

    We had her all wrong. Apparently, she’s a poet…

    “On Good and Evil”

    It is obvious to me
    Who the good guys are in this one
    And who the bad guys are.

    The bad guys are the ones
    Who say Israel is a stinking corpse,
    And should be wiped off
    The face of the earth.

    That’s not a good guy.

    (To K. Couric, CBS News, Sept.

    25, 2008)

    “You Can’t Blink”

    You can’t blink.

    You have to be wired
    In a way of being
    So committed to the mission,

    The mission that we’re on,
    Reform of this country,
    And victory in the war,
    You can’t blink.

    So I didn’t blink.

    (To C. Gibson, ABC News, Sept.

    11, 2008)


    These corporations.

    Today it was AIG,
    Important call, there.

    (To S. Hannity, Fox News, Sept.

    18, 2008)

    “Befoulers of the Verbiage”

    It was an unfair attack on the verbiage
    That Senator McCain chose to use,
    Because the fundamentals,
    As he was having to explain afterwards,
    He means our workforce.

    He means the ingenuity of the American.

    And of course that is strong,
    And that is the foundation of our economy.

    So that was an unfair attack there,
    Again based on verbiage.

    (To S. Hannity, Fox News, Sept.

    18, 2008)

    “Secret Conversation”

    I asked President Karzai:

    “Is that what you are seeking, also?
    “That strategy that has worked in Iraq?
    “That John McCain had pushed for?
    “More troops?
    “A counterinsurgency strategy?”

    And he said, “Yes.

    (To K. Couric, CBS News, Sept.

    25, 2008)


    I am a Washington outsider.

    I mean,
    Look at where you are.

    I’m a Washington outsider.

    I do not have those allegiances
    To the power brokers,
    To the lobbyists.

    We need someone like that.

    (To C. Gibson, ABC News, Sept.

    11, 2008)

  26. PatrickH says:

    But it’s so warm and sunny down here in the Bay of Pigs. And there’s so much lipstick!

  27. Faithless Wife Sarah says:

    And yes, ohmahgahbuggabah, I am dancing with Ricky, actually. How did you know?

    You see, after that unshaven fellow, what was his name again? Oliver Martini! Yes, yes, they ALL have names like that, don’t they? After Oliver, well, let me down, I knew I needed some of that old-time Latin loving! So I decided to visit the Bay of Piglets and spend some time with family!

    I’ve always loved the music of the Castro Brothers–do you remember that movie about those old men playing their mocambos and gazongas and bongo bazoomo thingies and screaming all night? The Boner Visa Social Club for Spics, or something? Well, you MUST remember the Castro boys in that, don’t you? They were just sooo masculine, with their beards and their penises and their military worn-outs [I think she means “military fatigues” – ed.] and their penises…Sigh. Penises.


    Oh! Tee-hee! Lost in [makes air quotes] “thought” there for a minute!

    [FWS winks broadly. Winks again. A minute passes. She winks again. More minutes pass. She emits seven winks, twelve giggles, and blinks thirty seven times. More minutes pass. Katie Couric rushes in, screams twice, slaps FWS in the face but is dragged off by Klansmen in the McCain security detail.]

    [FWS nods and smiles. She winks once and seems to notice a teleprompter. She squints, leans forward and finally haltingly resumes speech.]

    Anyway. Down. I. Came. To. Cuba. Cue. Bah. It was tough at first. The Castro Brothers just wanted me to suck and lick their penises and masturbate with their beards. It was okay, but then they fell asleep and some men with guns made me leave! And all the other musicians from the Screaming Spic Music Club are dead! Sob! So now you can see why I really hate abortion!

    Anyway, I was drinking on the beach and stripping my clothes off, even my under-parka (Cuba is warmer than home that’s for sure!) and shouting at all the Cuban men (especially the daaaark ones: they were so much fun at my wedding!) to come and fuck me up the ass. Well, after a couple of hours, one of them finally did!

    His name is Ricky. Ricky Ricardo. Ricardo Montalban. Ricky Montalban Martin. Ricky Martino. Oliver Martino. No, Martino Montalban? [Stares at the teleprompter. Minutes pass.] Oh, fiddlesticks! What difference does his name make! He’s a Spic!

    Sigh. I think I am in love.

    So yes, I’ve been dancing with Ricky for days now. He is so Latin. He puts his thing in my heinie, and when I start to cry, he shouts, “Luuuube eeeez for loooooozers!!!”. Then he pulls my hair, tells me, “Time to dance now, putita!”, and then just goes wild doing the mambo up my rear!

    His rhythm is flawless. 300 hard deep strokes every single minute. Never misses a beat. Sigh. Now I know I am in love.

    There is one problem though. I brought beautiful perfect Trig down here with me to get some sun for his oily pale mongoloid skin that’s so disgusting to me when I’m not on camera. Well guess what? Ricky grabs Trig from me, holds him up in the air, and asks over and over and over again, “Do chew have a lisaaaahnse for dat miiiinnnkkeeyyy!!!”

    And then he beats Trig until he bleeds. Trig, of course! Not Ricky! Trig is the one who bleeds! Don’t be silly!

    Sigh. I love Ricky. He’s giving Trig the quality of life I knew the little freak deserved when I brought him into this lovely world.

    Got to go! Ricky’s bringing over six or seven of his friends to do the mambo with me. Tee-hee! It’s like my second wedding and honeymoon all over again. I feel like a new woman! Except I can’t sit down without screaming. Tee! [Wink]

    Wish you were here, Todd–NOT!!! [Wink]

    Your Faithless Wife,

    P.S. OOOOWWWW!!! Don’t pull my hair so hard!!!

  28. Tobi Lynne says:

    That back patting thing really confused me as well … she seems so anti-maternal with that poor kid.

  29. you can’t stop now, sister wolf! it’s just getting a little surreal with all that winking, goshgee-ness and “call-outs.” one good PAP Smear meeting and you’ll be reinvigorated (wink, wink!).

  30. Sarah P says:

    I apologize for my absense! I was busy pallin around with Raul and Fidel in search of the ever illusive upper lip. I find its safe to say that AnneMarie is all knowing, thus I must back her up that Palins upper lip has indeed gone missing. Perhaps it is ingrown. Perhaps its still attached from the last mouth fucking. Who can really say what happens to a pitt bull’s lipstick after biting the cocks of elderly GOP?

    Good news on the Cuba front! Bristol and Willow accompanied me and are now servicing the Castro Bros and soon the embargo will be lifted.

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