Now is the Time

Now is the time to be grateful for your friends, even though they won’t come over. If you don’t have friends, now is the time to regret being such a cunt.

Now is the time to refuse to call anything “the new normal.” Nothing is normal any more. Don’t pretend it’s normal and don’t adapt to it if it isn’t.

Now is the time to stop fixating on toilet paper. Think of people in India who never had toilet paper. Think of the girls in third world countries who don’t have sanitary pads or tampons!

Now is the time to stay away from Twitter, where no one can do a single thing without incurring the wrath of a billion lunatics looking for the scapegoat du jour. That way madness lies, or you know, The New Madness.

Now is the time to avoid lists of fun things to do at home. You aren’t at summer camp. You’re under house arrest! Admit it!

Now is the time to be the person you wanted to be, instead of the person you are. Be the better person. Pretend to care about your neighbors and ask them what you can pick up for them when you go out to stand in line for water and Tylenol. Call or text everyone to ask if they need help with anything.

Now is the time to retain your sense of humor! Shit is still funny! I’m trying to prank an entity that invited me to attend a fake Women’s Summit in my city. Keep your fingers crossed that they take my bait!

Now is the time to experiment with make up. No one knows that in real life, you don’t wear blue lipstick. So now you can!

When everything is forbidden, you are free from the old rules!

That’s all I have for now, comrades. Let me know what’s on your minds.

~

*cartoon by Sam Wallman and Miroslav Sandev

This entry was posted in Horrible Stuff, News, Words and tagged , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

6 Responses to Now is the Time

  1. Romeo says:

    And start a vegetable garden in case you or your neighbors get hungry before the jobs come back.

  2. Mina says:

    My country, even my village, is in quarantine since a week.
    Results until now:
    Got a lot of time for my personal projects. In these days I achieved more than in the last few months.
    I feel a huge freedom in behavior, while striving in the woods like a savage.
    Neighbors shivering in front of their TVs.
    I got a lot closer to my family, as we’re trying to stay tender with each other.
    And I ask myself:
    How many relations I feed, only by my need for recognition?
    How much time I spend with consumption of something that doesn’t give me anything? /but lack of money

    Beside all this, outside-world is striking back in very confusing actions.
    Had a female astronaut in my frontyard today, taking body-fluids of my sister-in-law.

    Let’s have a sleepover all this. The spacewoman had nice, glittery shoes…

  3. Sister Wolf says:

    Romeo – Good advice, yep.

    Mina – What a wonderful and poignant comment! I can picture you in the woods…and the spacewoman’s shoes. I hope your sister-in-law is okay.

    Please keep me posted with how you’re doing. xoxo

  4. Dana says:

    Wow clothes shoes and makeup are suddenly totally irrelevant. Wtf have we been thinking all this time?

    Well not totally irrelevant but I sure as hell don’t need new ones. I don’t even need to buy thrift on thredup.

    I love you. Stay healthy

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