OMG, Killing It

Sometimes it’s not enough to wear fierce boots that you can barely walk in and that make your feet look like hooves. Sometimes, you need horseshoes on the soles in order to get that Fuck, Yeah look.

Here’s how Style Noir describes these boots:

“Continuing our fetish theme this month, we bring to you possibly the most insane, yet visually stunning heels we’ve seen in a very long time. Forget surreal heels, these bad boys out-do anything you’ve ever seen before.”

Wow. “Bad boys,” “insane.” Ready to go on?

We have simply fallen in love with these. Imagine these teamed with tribal fashion, fur and a serious sense of attitude. Could anything look better?

I actually think something could look better, but that’s just me.

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47 Responses to OMG, Killing It

  1. Cheraya says:

    Those are just fucking stupid looking. Brings a whole new level of meaning to the term ‘victim’…….

  2. Kenita says:

    How the fuck are they going to get out the door?? DID ANYONE SEE THE INTERVIEW FOR BEYONCE’S “GREEN LIGHT” VIDEO?? She wore those high ballet shoes for the video and put herself and dancers through living hell. But the rich can afford corrective surgery, we can’t.


  3. Kenita says:

    PS. What the hell do they mean by tribal fashion!? That’s rubbing my craw red. Are they referring to Africans, Asians, what?! Assholes.

  4. Miggs says:

    Awesomely enough, these are the least hideous of all the company’s hideous, hideous shoes.

  5. Maggie says:

    there are much more uncomfortable things that go with the pony fetish. don’t ask how I know this.

  6. Miss B says:


    Make that double ick. I agree with you, SW, I can think of many more things that would look better.

  7. Queen Marie says:

    Vile vile vile


  8. I can’t stop laughing! Ridiculous

  9. arline says:

    Why? oh why?, is the question.

  10. Dru says:

    “sense of attitude”? Have these people ever had a look in a dictionary, or a plain old English textbook?

  11. Maja says:

    Hah, I was wondering when these would pop up in fashion blogs. I saw them years ago when we had a project on niche products in design school. It was the niche-iest priduct we could think of. Pony Fetish boots, come on! Can’t the pervs get to keep anything for themselves anymore?

  12. kenju says:

    I don’t know what idiot wrote that ad copy, but they need to be locked up. What sado/masochist designed those shoes?

  13. Dru says:

    That copy sounds like a refinery29 writer was let loose on it.

  14. thereswaterhere says:

    I’m sorry, but I think it would be hilarious to see some heiress or personal style blogger unknowingly wear fetish boots because they think they look “insane, yet visually stunning.”

  15. Paige says:

    more than the shoes, what’s bothering me is this persistant use of ‘tribal’. so fucking patronizing.

  16. Ann says:

    Difficult to say which is worse – the copy or the shoe itself. They were destined to be together as one shiteous package deal.

  17. Pudfish says:

    Do you have to go to a blacksmiths to get re-shod?

  18. rebecca says:

    I just threw up in my mouth a little bit

  19. Jill says:

    Next they will be accessorizing with one of these…

  20. HelOnWheels says:

    All of the sudden I have an intense craving for oats. Anybody else?

  21. Mark says:

    I wish I owned a trashy clothing company so you could write all the outrageous catalog copy.

  22. rebecca says:

    Wait, I don’t understand what’s wrong with “tribal”. Other than the fashion industry’s need to exploit some sort of tagline to make everybody dress the same way each new season. And this season it’s tribal prints. Is it just the way it was worded in this thingie, or is it tribal-prints-as-fashion in general?

  23. patni says:

    defines ass ugly. With the donkey shoe to prove it.
    and the copy….. don’t they teach English in schools any more? and does NO ONE understand that the word ‘tribal” when used to describe something that is not from a tribe but just kind of a general stereotype of what africanish “primitive” types might make is horribly offensive? (as is primitive and africanish)

  24. Eliza says:

    Rebecca, the industry exploits an entire culture, not just a tagline, when it romanticizes so-called tribal fashion. Humans become commodities. We ignore the many African designers to let white people appropriate their fabrics and accessories without thought to tradition, politics, history, etc. There’s a feminist dissertation in here somewhere…

  25. Kenita says:

    Now that I think of @Jill’s post, these shoes remind me of all 4 sexually graphic novels from Anne Rice’s The Claiming of Sleeping Beauty. Those were some very good books. The best erotica yet, with horse shoes and cock rings…

  26. I think Mark is really onto something, but how about just the copy and no company? And you can read it out loud and call it performance art.

  27. Kenita says:

    Oh, and patni, that is exactly what my questions tried to convey. Can’t they just say print? Why does it have to be tribal? I take offense to that, because my headwraps would be considered “tribal,” when it’s cultural. I think there’s a large difference between those two words.

  28. Alicia says:

    Do people really think these shoes are to actually be worn? I mean…who walks around on tiptoe? These are for bondage films. I mean, the site that sells them is called PUNITIVE SHOES.

  29. Bessie the Buddha cow says:

    You have just reminded me of why I don’t look at fashion mags and blogs. I just can’t wrap my mind around “the most insane” boots. I guess there’s nothing like confining the physical and psychology at the same time in the name of fetish fashion. Throwing up my cud again!

  30. dust says:

    Aaaah, pretty little horses… They make a womah!

  31. rebecca says:

    Patni, Eliza, Kenita: It makes a bit more sense to me now… I guess I never thought of ‘tribal’ as an African print, but as a patterned print coming from any sort of tribal culture– like Native American prints are being all Opening-Ceremonyized too. I don’t think that ‘print’ would cut it– as it’s not just prints that are supercool, but prints from tribal cultures that are in vogue.

    However I have issues with this kind of thing in general… not people doing it as individuals, especially if, say, you went to a small African country and found some really cool fabrics, or if you have an interest in other cultures in general, but in a “ok, Vogue says we dress like we’re in a ‘primitive’ culture and so now feathers in our hair and prints all over our bodies isn’t just kinda cool, it’s totally hip.” And then I picture a bunch of models parading around the grasslands in Kenya dressed in ‘tribal’ wear drinking their bottled water getting airbrushed, while a few people from a real tribe look on scratching their heads with bewilderment. Or even thirst. THAT, I find to be one of the most absurd aspects of the fashion industry (Derlicht campaign from Zoolander comes to mind).

  32. GlamaRuth says:

    These boots actually aren’t meant to be walked in. Look at the base of the toe – pointed straight down. Fetish use only for this pair. Can’t they just hunt ebay for a pair of Fluevog Grand Nationals, which can actually be used for, you know, locomotion?

  33. GlamaRuth says:

    Eww. They also like that “touched by Terry” t-shirt.

  34. Sister Wolf says:

    GlamaRuth – Fuck! Morons! They think it’s “witty”. They’re smart to not take comments over there, fucking idiots.

  35. rebecca says:

    “Now if we remember rightly this is how Henry Holland started out, clever, satirical t-shirts that snowballed into a complete movement, eventually ending up designing full blown high fashion collections. Could this be the same way Christopher Lee Sauve will follow? It’s possible, but for now we can just sit back and enjoy the wittiness of Christopher’s mind.

    You can purchase this tantalizing tee from Seven New York for 65 dollars.”

    Note: “clever, satirical, wittiness, tantalizing, $65”

    Well fuck me. This person can WRITE. Absolute shite, that is.

    And why is being so blase about sexual abuse funny? I hate these people.

  36. Aja says:

    Laughing at Rebecca (and agreeing) and agreeing with Kenita and everyone else that’s sick of this stupid “tribal” phrase. I remember last summer when it started popping up in the fashion vocabulary. I remember the distinct feeling of wanting to punch faces in. Utterly ridiculous.

  37. Angelica says:

    I really did not need to know about fashion bloggers’ bestiality fetishes.

  38. Mary says:

    I find those boots really funny. Do you have to have them shod, like you do a real pony, every 5 weeks or so?

  39. dust says:

    Just to correct some o you, “tribal” has been around since 60’s, YSL made a first cone wooden bra back then. On the other hand, resurrecting it every season and asking us to act surprised every time, is becoming too much.
    In the last decade it was too much connected to the new age too, for me that’s a deal breaker.
    Now, I hope this helped hating it more!

  40. Eliza says:

    GlamaRuth, I was waiting for someone to mention the Grand Nationals! They’re less literal and more functional, but not really aesthetically pleasing, either.

  41. Aja says:

    It has helped dust, now I’m livid! Thanks!

  42. RedHeadFashionista says:

    And we thought we’d seen it all.
    I bet Daphne Guinness wears them next week.

  43. dust says:

    Any time Aja, the pleasure is all mine.
    Dusturbance is counting 10 last days before the fashion show. Do know if I should cry or laugh?

  44. dust says:

    I had to Google livid. Excellent word, thank you!

  45. TheBadKate says:

    @GlamaRuth – They don’t even need to skulk round EBay. They can purchase one of the variants of The LA boot right now. Can’t think why John Fluevog didn’t think to add a horseshoe to the bottom of those (although he did design some with metallic heels) – that would have been totally killing.

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