I already knew that people are nuts, but spending some time in Facebook groups this week has revealed a whole new level of nuts. Maybe it’s The New Nuts. Group members are like piranha, waiting for a newbie to make a comment so they can perform a feeding frenzy.
A few years ago, my sister told me about joining an Opera group on Facebook. According to her, she made an innocent comment, and everyone pounced on her. She was shaken by the experience, because she has an extensive knowledge of opera. I didn’t understand why this happened until now.
Why do FB groups propagate this crazy behavior? Are the people who join groups already crazy? Or does being a group member generate deranged tribal behavior?
I wondered if groups centered on the arts attract irritable snobs. But a friend told me her Laundry Tips group was nuts too. This is kind of exciting, actually, and tempts me to join a million groups, to observe how petty and hostile they are.
I learned this shit the hard way by commenting in a group called “Victorian Images”. I rarely look at it but I did yesterday. There was a sepia photo of a stiff little child standing on a chair, as her mother knelt at her side. Stupidly, I commented that it looked like a postmortem photo. It seemed obvious, in fact, that it was a postmortem photo.
Before I knew it, everyone commented on my ignorance, some angry, some mocking. It was incredible. It was death by a thousand cuts. One person exclaimed that I wouldn’t be “satisfied unless there was a Dead Victorian Baby”. I suggested that they were acting nuts, and conceded that I might have been wrong.
So I posted the image on my own page, and got a unanimous vote that the baby was dead. So I went back to the group and said the baby was totally fucking dead, quoting Monty Python, etc etc.
Now, everyone knows that neighborhood groups are contentious, except for their hatred of the homeless, but I just had no idea about other groups. Why don’t these nutcases take their fury to Twitter, where the action is? Are they pussies, only brave enough to vent in a private FB group?
While I have a deep disregard for trolls, I’ve decided to become one on Facebook. Everyone hates me anyway so why not? At least I can have some fun. I read a thing about losing weight in my Sisters AARP newsletter for Black women. It asked me to list ten things that made me feel good, besides eating. TEN, are they kidding? I could only think of 4. You try it.
Well, now I can add trolling to my list, for a total of five things. Yay, me.
I don’t hate you. I admire you!
Oh, yeah, this is how we maintain denial about how many totally dead babies there are going to be due to our cowardice or selfish indifference. By maintaining ideological/linguistic purity we get to enjoy our time here in this walled off zen garden while people in Texas freeze to death or whichever latest avoidable catastrophe unfolds.
It’s just one of the social constructs that lets that dog drink his coffee in a fiery maelstrom, “This is fine,” and whatnot.
Well, ~I~ don’t think the baby is dead, but I’m not going to go nuts about it. ?
I’ve always wanted to tell you, I’ve read your blog for years, I found it randomly one day (I think during the Sea of Shoes era?) I have always loved your amazing writing and rants. Just wanted you to know I think you are a wonderful writer ?
Haha, please ignore the question marks, those were emojis. (pretend there are many sadfaces here)
Anyone who has done portraits with wet plate or daguerreotype technique knows that long exposures and razor thin depth of field make it very difficult to have a sitter’s face appear in focus and with no motion blur. People are not statues and you can’t blame them for moving ever so slightly during a 3-20 second wet plate exposure, and for daguerreotypes exposures can run into minutes! Some people are much better at holding perfectly still than others, but even if they hold still during the actual exposure, just a little swaying forward or back while the photographer loads the camera will make the part of the face intended to be in focus not critically sharp… It’s a constant battle and it is for this exact reason that a head brace has been invented in mid-1800s and they were used by every portrait photographer well into the 20th century.
Historically every photo studio had about half a dozen of these head brace devices, so when they had a family show up for a group portrait every person would have one in the back of their head. To operate them you simply pose the person being photographed (sitting or standing) then adjust this brace to the the correct height and place the fork on the end of the beam to be pressed against the sitter’s head just behind the ears. The person being photograph simply slightly leans into it and thus remains perfectly in place between the time it takes to focus the camera and load the plate for exposure and, of course, during the exposure itself.
Miranda Mitsouko – Thank you so much!
Romeo – Well, maybe.
Thank you Lindsay, it’s great to know I’m not just ranting into the wind, you know?
ezrite – Aha, I can see the neck brace! Thank you for your expertise! I’m gonna stick with dead for now, even if she isn’t! Because that’s my brand.
You’ve found a new playground!
I’m so joining the Victorian FB group to stir up some hate.
But what if you are all just trolls? Every group member is there for the same reason. Their own cruel entertainment.
I don’t know what to make of this.
I think the baby in question is scared of that witch kneeling down ready to rip her eyes out!
ive found trolling extreme white wing like Oath Takers and evangelical groups extremely gleeful. The hate faucet gets turned on full strength! I love to nag them about their stupid conspiracy theories; the fact that they don’t want to give “handouts” to people to but they wring their hands about abortions and the mothers having more babies to feed; the Trumpers who still believe in his grotesqueness…the list goes on. It’s low risk aggression that people with intellect and a conscience can participate in. Then there are the mommy groups, the ones where women went through fertilization agony and now they e enslaved their mothers to take care of the children because they need to get out of the house! It’s endless. Enjoy it.
I totally thought the baby was deceased too, that has to be her mother, in black, kneeling by her. Her face is a little animated, however.
sometimes I go on Twitter and pick fights with the idiots. I stay off FB, tho, that is a cesspool and why would I want to join a group that would have me, to paraphrase Groucho.
YouTube is a fun place to get in “discussions”, has happened to me only twice, about pink guns in front of small children and Jesus.
Good times.
I think what your son has done to you is so unbelievably awful that if he showed up tomorrow with an apology you would need to figure out some way to keep his toxicity from harming you in the future. I don’t know. But holy hell.
There are house groups and you can totally rip into people’s decorating choices. I mean they’re asking for it. They show off their hideous 80s furniture in a craftsman home. As if.
hahahaha..i dropped facebook several years ago and my life is so much better….but I know this behavior goes on in ANY CHAT group including sibling text threads…..one wrong word and you’re toast. LOL