Gala Darling Wants Stuff

Some helpful readers have alerted me to the Gala Darling wish list at Amazon.com, and it has been a revelation. Here I thought those wish lists were for books you wanted to read.

The list of 348 items that Gala wants is as brazen as Gala herself.   It includes cosmetics, chocolate, a personal laser hair remover ($448), magazine subscriptions, soda, and oddly enough, books.

The books are deeply offensive to a literary snob like myself, so don’t make me list them. Let me just say that I’m tempted to fulfill her wish for a copy of “The Haunted Vagina” but I can’t justify spending $7.95 for a moment of perverse satisfaction.

I still can’t understand the appeal of this Gala person, aside from reveling in her awfulness. She makes me feel squeamish.   The wish list business suggests a new level of shamelessness that I hesitate to even explore.

But if wish lists are okay for bloggers, I want one too. Here are the preferred items:

1. New roof (somewhere between $4000 and $7,000)   Nice to have before the next rainfall!
2. Pay my medical bills from hip fracture, $2,200
3. Pay my auto insurance and gas bills.
4. Nordstrom bill minimum payment $35
5. Facial filler $600 +

Oh god, this list is no fun, no wonder I’m never invited to blogger conferences!

Gala may not want your comments but she wants a shitload of merchandise. Feel empowered to leave her a comment here.   I will go first:

Dear Gala Darling, What the hell is your deal?! Why all the icky self-help books when I thought you were a self-help guru yourself? Why the hair-removal? Why the pink? And what’s up with the Nubby Twiglet? No offense, but don’t you guys have mirrors? Sorry about all the questions, just ignore them if you want, cuz I’m not gonna buy you anything, ever. Love, SW

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96 Responses to Gala Darling Wants Stuff

  1. Sister Wolf says:

    Madeline – Is she like one of those preachers who rails about homosexuals but molests little boys on the side? Metaphorically?

  2. elle says:

    i posted this in the wrong post, forgive me SW!

    If you guys want a real laugh- gala before she was ~famous: http://galadarling.livejournal.com/

    here is the entry from when she changed her name: http://galadarling.livejournal.com/67964.html

    trust me, it’s good.

  3. Madeline says:

    Sister Wolf, I could not have put it more eloquently myself.

    I can’t believe that I actually looked up to someone like that.

  4. Braindance says:

    Suck it Gala, I bought a chesterfield sofa at a car boot, for £30 ($50)
    That is what happens when you actually look for stuff.
    Even got a matching chair at a DIFFERENT car boot the next day.
    I did not use radical self love to get it, but beady eyes and a desire to get up at 7am on a sunday morning. Simples.

  5. Dru says:

    ^you guys (the commenters) really kill me, you know that? Good thing I wasn’t actually drinking water when I read that, it would’ve gone up my nose from the laughing.

  6. HelOnWheels says:

    “Oh no, HelOnWheels, we don’t want her back!”

    @Miggs – Too bad! We didn’t want her to begin with!

    The welcome sign on the U.S. is “Give me your tired, your poor, Your huddled masses yearning to breathe free, The wretched refuse of your teeming shore. Send these, the homeless, tempest-tossed to me. I lift my lamp beside the golden door”.
    It is NOT “Give me your spoiled, your rich, Your trust-fund babies yearning to spend free, The pampered refuse of your wide expanses. Send these, the wealthy, first-class ensconced to me. I lift my gold card besides the Barney’s door.” Nope, you have to take her back. Plus, based on what I’ve seen of her “writing,” she’s helping to pull down our literacy level.

  7. Emily Bleak says:

    At least she’s good for the economy!

  8. Madeline says:

    @BethUK, Gala’s a complete hypocrite in that whole fur issue, too.

    In her infamous “fur dilemma” article, she complains about not knowing what to do morally with a fur coat that is in her current ensemble which consisted of a purple sweatshirt, black sweatpants and UGG boots along with the coat.

    http://galadarling.com/article/elf-princess-a-furry-dilemma

    When only one person brought up the issue that not only was she wearing the fur of an animal but the actual skin of a sheep for her boots in her comments, it was no surprise when she didn’t address it.

    She also said that she loved the idea of donating her fur coat to a charity listed in the article, but has yet to do it. In another article dated a long while after that she still mentioned to having more than one fur coat in her repertoire.

  9. Olsenboye says:

    Yo, don’t forget Gala Darling’s other blog, Love letter to the universe. It is even more revolting!! Bragging about her trust fund sex and the city lifestyle! oh la la consumerism!

    http://lovelettertotheuniverse.com/

    Schedule:
    Las Vegas.
    New York.
    Auckland.
    New York.
    London.
    New York.
    & all before the 23rd of September. HI-LAR-IOUS. Hilarious!!!!!!!!
    Anyway, I think all of the events will be fun. I am staying in rad hotels & seeing good people. What’s a few hours in an airplane really? I ask you! I arks you! Ha!

    got a bunch of really slutty underwear in the mail yesterday. It was so exciting. No really, you think I’m exaggerating but I am not. I am talking one-pieces with lots of straps & o-rings & pink leopard-print mesh covered in sequins (NOT EXAGGERATING THAT IS THE EXACT DESCRIPTION OF ONE OF THE THINGS I GOT), & “wicked fairy” costumes (I am going to wear it today I think even though it is a bit ~*~goth~*~ but whatever, whatever, I love it, it is cute), & fishnets & sequinned suspender belts (FOR REAL) & other silly things. I also got a package from Charlotte Russe full of cute things, like two-tone over-the-knee socks, underwear, a t-shirt with a motorcycle on it (HA!), a dress, a cute zippered sweatshirt, etc. Yay. Yay. Yay. Consumerism is fantastic. So there.

    http://lovelettertotheuniverse.com/?p=847

    Today I went to the bank & withdrew $3000. Then I bought plane tickets. Did some copywriting, went to the organics store (again), danced, hooped.
    http://lovelettertotheuniverse.com/?p=288

    Sister Wolf, how about a blog post on this? Love.

  10. bella says:

    id love to see what you look like in real life.
    my guess is your some average fucking loser who gets off on making fun of people and being a bully online. YOURE SO STRONG AND WITTY ON THIS embarresment of a website.
    post a photo of yourself so we can rip you apart and make fun of your nose and your clothes and your stupid little life.
    GO ON

  11. mmmcoffee says:

    bella- are you new?

    Also you spelled embarrassment wrong..I guess I don’t need to point out the irony in that for you.

  12. Madeline says:

    @Bella

    You obviously didn’t read anything we had to say in the comments or you would have understood what we were saying.

    Our issue with Gala Darling is that she is a hypocrite in practically all of her articles. She preaches how her readers should be happy without material possessions and then posts an article the same week about what shiny gems she’s lusting after now. The examples could go on for pages but you really should try reading some of our comments.

    We’re also completely appalled by having such a ridiculous wish list put up for the SOLE reason of people buying her things, the same people who she won’t even bother reading comments from. She doesn’t care what they have to say, only what they’re going to pay for like $3,000 couches or $125 dollar one ounce face creams or $70 CELL PHONE CHARMS!

  13. Miggs says:

    She’s actually been featured in national magazines here in NZ. So if we have to take her back, she might get more attention, and that would be like a stab to my heart. So maybe Bulgaria can take her, HelOnWheels? Yemen maybe?

  14. carl gordon-jenkins-gordon-jenkins says:

    These gala posts seem quite popular. I think the self absorbed photo vomit of the over priced hideous clothes she buys combined with the pseudo self help and ‘radical self love’ bullshit makes her even more worthy of mockery than Jane of shoes.

  15. I can’t stop reading about her. I’m convinced she’s just putting this mad e-number persona on. She just makes me think of those two horses in the ‘Charlie the Unicorn’ video. ‘A magical land of sweets, and joy, and joyness!’ What the heck is being a love letter to the universe? What the heck is her obsession with sequins? Oh God my eyes are going funny from all the pink. Thank God for you Sister, your dry wit and brutal rage is the perfect antidote to Pepto Bismol Girl.

  16. Elizette says:

    I used to feel The Rage whenever I read her blog but ever since I started calling her “Galah Darling” in my head, I’ve felt a lot better about things.

    http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=galah

  17. jimbo says:

    is sisterwolf the new GALA DARLING NOW?
    this is like “animal farm” or something. kick out the farmers and bring in the pigs. she is no different attention seeking whore than the rest of them. Just using a different tactic to what they both (and most) strive for.

    ATTENTION

  18. mmmcoffee says:

    Except she doesn’t call it art so it’s not nearly as obnoxious.

  19. Sister Wolf says:

    Hey, fuck you, this IS art!

  20. jimbo says:

    ofcourse she thinks its art. She’s so proud of herself.

  21. Olsenboye says:

    It’s art.

    Gala Darling: Thomas Kinkade, sappy rainbow angel vomit.
    Sister Wolf: Willem de Kooning, brutal provoking expressionism.

    take yer pick.

  22. HelOnWheels says:

    Hey, Jimbo, are you Gala’s annoying, tat-covered, hipster idiot, easy-to-despise-just-based-on-appearance boyfriend?? I bet you are. I think it’s adorable how you’re trying to defend her, in your little illiterate, ineffective manner. Maybe you should try a different tactic: instead of attacking SW why don’t you tell us why Galah should not be ridiculed.

    @Olsenboye – I think Gala Darling: Kindergarten art class project with unsupervised access to glue and glitter. Because even Kinkade has artistic skill.

  23. jimbo says:

    haha i wish i was her hipster boyfriend.
    nah im a girl. and im not young. i dont even follow the website.
    I just know her from wellington actually and think shes cool. i just thought it would be nice to have a real life person who knows her to be annoying on this website. since she probably gets a bunch of strangers giving her shit on hers constantly. giving a little back. Haha her boyfriend. imagine if he even looked at these things. i doubt it. He looks a little old for it.

  24. yoshi says:

    youre a loser. get a life you old hag

  25. HelOnWheels says:

    Oh, so jimbo, in other words, you’re an asshole. And a liar. Well, either a liar or have the maturity level of a 10 year-old. “Giving a little back” on here would be involve intelligent, coherent comments that would defend Galah rather than attack Sister Wolf. Why don’t you go spend your time more productively since there’s zero reason for you to be here; nobody can give Galah shit on her website, she’s cut-off comments, you idiot.

    Yoshi – Guess you don’t see the irony of being on SW’s website, a site you don’t like, and telling her to get a life.

  26. Sister Wolf says:

    HelOnWHeels- I cannot get a life as long as there are wankers like these kids from NZ (bella, jimbo etc) who need me.

  27. Heinous says:

    Anyone seen this picture of Gala posted on White Lightning?

    http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_26_EZ7V1d68/TKOFCoxUnTI/AAAAAAAAHDw/s6S2Lkt5YLY/s1600/DSC_1751.jpg

    I daresay Ms. Gala is looking many years older than we’re supposed to think she is, no?

  28. Karen says:

    @heinous, Gala Darling is a smoker and tans. More proof of her hypocrisy, as she preaches healthy living, juices, detox, raw foods. Gala gets what she deserves, old hag skin that no $500 cream can fix. Get a job, trust fund fraud!

  29. Dru says:

    She’s a heinous “writer” and a painfully obvious bullshitter who should be coming to the end of her 15 minutes right around…now. Can we stick to ripping her a new one for that, please? No need to bring her looks into the discussion, she’d be awful even if she looked like Amanda Seyfried.

  30. Vixie says:

    This post, and indeed this blog is the shittest thing I’ve ever read. Gala can come across as a bit flaky, but do you think this pointless nasty shit makes you any better?

    It makes you look jealous, and lame as fuck. Delete this as soon as you wish, because you can’t handle the criticism any more than she can.

    Get a real job, or at least don’t hide your bitterness behind this shitty lameness

  31. Sister Wolf says:

    Vixie – Really? The shittiest thing you ever read??

  32. Jo says:

    Google “Pansy Lane”. Call me insane, but I swear she’s Gala. None of her photos have her looking directly at the camera. I feel like I’m taking crazy pills.

  33. Lauren says:

    Jesus. You guys are really getting off on this.

  34. getoverit says:

    Just because your a bitter hag that no one loves you feel the need to rag on gala?

    Why don’t you make a wish list? I’m sure no one wants to help you out because you’re a sad old miserable fuck. People throw money at gala because she cute fun and inspirational…to bad you’re not hey

  35. Hayley says:

    Sister Wold, ‘jimbo’ is Gala’s ‘friend’ Jennie…

  36. JENNIE says:

    who are you hayley?
    we supposedly know eachother. ive seen you bad mouthing gala all over the internet for a few years now and i cant think who you are.

  37. Synchronicity! says:

    Hi guys! I know I’m late to the party, but I found this site (and page) last night.

    All this talk about her wishlist got me curious, so I checked her site today for the first time in about 5 years (had a quick peek once, then proceeded to vomit all over myself and never went back), and couldn’t believe what I saw:

    “beauty products, oh my. You should see my Amazon wishlist! I can’t wait to dig into some new eye creams, gradual tanners, fragrances, oils, & scrubs!” http://galadarling.com/article/behind-the-scenes-leopard-print-coats-plenty-to-love

    Yep. There’s that vomit again…

  38. Sister Wolf says:

    Synchronicity – Oh god, hahahahhahahha, thanks for reminding me about her! xo

  39. WTF says:

    ok well now she’s interviewing a sex workers for her blog. what a great role model for young girls! *facepalm*

  40. Bill says:

    Uh, narcissist?

  41. Jason says:

    Wow, you are all so incredibly nasty.

  42. J says:

    This is hilarious! Galah is a moron.

  43. Sara says:

    Reviving this thread because everything in it is still applicable like FIVE YEARS LATER.

  44. mlap says:

    This is a scam. Google and c for yourself. This person is Sociopath. She is promoting her “brand” as Christian and has a cyber church. (#128110#)(#128110#)(#128110#)(#128110#)(#128110#)(#128078#)

  45. mlap says:

    That girl in that first pic is dressed like mime/clown. I think they r doing this on purpose. This is so offensive and manipulative. She is purposely targeting women that are vulnerable. I would try a class action lawsuit. Wherever she has that ball. I would get her that way BC u can break the law online. Amazon should have some kind of agreement she probably broke as well. Good luck

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