Okay, this is a complicated story and I’m pretty stoned. But stick with me.
There’s a model/actress named Emily Something who is mostly known for her large breasts. I almost wrote “big tits” but stopped myself. Anyway, she was at some celebrity event where she was seated next to a New York Times reporter.
The reporter made a comment about Melania Trump, referring to her as a “hooker.”
So the Emily girl goes to Twitter and scolds the reporter for the sexist comment, tweeting:
Sat next to a journalist from the NYT last night who told me ‘Melania is a hooker.’ Whatever your politics it’s crucial to call this out for what it is: slut shaming. I don’t care about her nudes or sexual history and no one should.
Gender specific attacks are disgusting sexist bullshit.
Melania Trump heard about Emily defending her, and used her FLOTUS account to tweet her thanks:
Wow, Melania is woman, hear her roar!
Then, Emily retweets a person who also defends Melania’s honor with the following lecture:
Okay. So, on the one hand, Emily is all “How dare you call Melania a hooker!” and on the other hand, salutes the notion that being a hooker is a personal, valid choice. I don’t think we can trust this Emily.
Emily has those large breasts and she will get them out at the drop of a hat. She writes essays about how she and Kim Kardashian are being feminist when they show their huge tits, I mean bosoms. Emily wants to get your attention and then scold you while lording it over you. Her tits are everywhere. I don’t know how we could possibly satisfy her need to get them out. Maybe she could become a wet nurse. It’s a valid choice!
Meanwhile, Emily is threatening to sue a photographer who took a million nude pictures of her five years ago before she knew she was going to be a feminist. So she’s really mad. She doesn’t look mad in the photos but that was then.
Leaving Emily’s tits for just a moment, if we may, and getting back to the poor reporter, he has apologized profusely for his unseemly comment, and The New York Times has issued an apology for him as well.
The reporter happens to be the son of Carl Bernstein, one of the two guys who broke the Watergate story.
To sum up, we have a validly slutty model/actress who shamed a reporter for suggesting that the First Lady is a hooker even though Bravo for Hookers; and The New York Times has to apologize, even though the Washington Post didn’t have to apologize when his dad broke the Watergate story.
Or: Tits + Hooker – Sex Worker + Twitter x Shaming -Reporters = FLOTUS -Watergate.
Thoughts or explanations?