Rats and Pigs!

When was the last time you heard the word ‘pig’ so often? When you grabbed a bay’s toes and went “This little piggie went to market…?” Or when you saw the movie “Babe?”

Recently, I was blessed with a huge squishy pig that my BFF got me for my birthday, from Squishable.com.

I love this huge piggie! Piggies are so wonderful, why must piggies be maligned by Grandpa, whose own former press secretary wrote a book called “Lipstick on a Pig?!”

Pigs are certainly nicer than rats. But for some reason I was suckered into buying some legging things called “Black Rats” by Sass and Bide, who may have been inspired by another Aussie company, Ksubi, who made news by releasing hundreds of black rats down the aisle during their first runway show in 2001.

I honestly don’t know what made me buy these things, because they are ruched from waist to toe, and will thus make me look like a fat….well, something fat. You may be wondering why I keep buying things I’ll never wear, and I can only say that shopping is about Owning and Collecting, as Vogue magazine used to explain in the 60s.

Funnily enough, I also Own and Collect red lipstick, which is My Signature.

I was thinking of posting a photo of me wearing the Black Rats, a lot of lipstick, and holding my piggie, but that would involve too much effort. Just picture it in your mind’s eye. Then, picture Grandpa turning to Mrs. P and saying proudly, “That’ll do, Pig.”

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18 Responses to Rats and Pigs!

  1. Skye says:

    I was born in the Year of the Pig – so I must agree that pigs are much maligned and unfairly so!

    I can’t believe you bought those Black Rats leggings – I posted a horrible photo of them on me (tried on in a dept store) on my blog a while ago and I hoped that would be a sort of PSA to stop people falling into their evil ruched trap! I bet you look pretty hot in them though.

  2. WendyB says:

    I love cute pig things. And red lipstick.

  3. Imelda Matt says:

    It’s all in Sister W’s pacing and this post climaxed perfectly! After I saw Bryan Boy sassing about in the ‘rats’ I thought surely no sane person would want ’em. But they’ve sold tens of thousands of ruched fuckers! In my minds-eye I can see you wearing your rats and delivering The Church Lady a swift scissor kick to the chops!

  4. Sister Wolf says:

    Oh lord Jesus on the cross, forgive me for not knowing about the Black Rats, I was too busy with PAP Smear!

    Now I’ll have to pose in them on the commode.

  5. OMGGMAB says:

    Now that the repubs have co-opted the pig as their new mascot, we can take back the elephant and get it off the endangered species list. It may take years, but I’m sure that soon so many elephants will be roaming the wilds of Alaska that the pigs simply will be STOMPED out!

    PIGS = Purely Ignorant GOP SLOBS

  6. hammie says:

    OOO, someone had to watch Babe a few thousand times in their recent past hmm?

    I guess this means you want me to stop calling my cunt of a neighbor a pig in knickers?

  7. annemarie says:

    Another wonderful post Sister Wolf! I was inspired to go back into your previous entries on lipstick and hair. Then I thought about Sarah Palin’s hair. Then I thought about how shitty her hair must look at night when she takes it out of the perma-ponytail. Then I googled images of her and found the heavily touched up cover of Vogue where her face looks like it’s been superimposed onto someone else’s body:

    Not content to be merely a baby-snatcher, she is also a body-snatcher. And as for her own snatch, that’s a snatcher extraordinaire. Her snatch even snatched Hellrod, as we all know.

    Then I found more hair pictures and came across this website:


    …which lists 10 things people should know about Sarah Palin, much of it stuff we already know, but I like lists because they have the feel of ARTILLERY. It includes links that expand on each of the points, but here is the list cut n’ pasted for those too lazy or tired or depressed or enraged to go to the website itself:

    1) She is presently under investigation in Alaska for abuse of power

    2) She offered a bounty of $150 for each right front leg of freshly killed wolves.

    3) She is opposed to abortion even in cases of rape and incest

    4) She is a champion for big oil and supports drilling in the Arctic National Wildlife Refuge and everywhere else

    5) She believes creationism should be taught in public schools

    6) She believes man-made global warming is a farce

    7) She is opposed to listing the polar bear as an endangered species because she thinks it will limit oil exploitation

    8) While mayor of Wasilla she tried to fire the city librarian because the librarian refused to censor books

    9) She supports aerial hunting of wolves and bears even though Alaskans voted twice to ban the practice

    10) She used $400,000 of state money to fund a media campaign in support of aerial hunting

  8. annemarie says:

    I don’t know why bullet point 8 came out as a smiley face. My computer is smarter and funnier than I.

  9. honeypants says:

    Annemarie, I read that page, and I am really disgusted and saddened by her evil treatment of bears and wolves 🙁

    As for the Black Rats, they could never be as offensive as even one hair on Palin’s head. They looked cool in the photos, and I can see why you fell for them. Please do model them on the commode for us!

    Regarding the pigs, I think Manson had it right 😉

  10. Sal says:

    Hang on. After all that you’re SERIOUSLY going to deprive us of a photo of you in the Rats? You TEASE.

  11. Sister Wolf says:

    OMGGMAB – No animal is safe from SP

    Hammie – well, she’s a cunt, strictly speaking.

    annemarie – I have been to that site, it’s all bad. I worry that at this point, she could be seen eating her children but people would still say “What a gal! She didn’t even need salt or pepper!”

    Honeypants and Sal – I WILL model them, just to do penance for buying them.

  12. enc says:

    Seriously, break with the photo of you in those leggings.

  13. I want the Black Rats!!! I just convinced a friend to buy a pair online – when I first saw them on the runway I fell in love.
    but perhaps they don’t translate in real life. give me a picture, yo!!!!

  14. OMGGMAB says:

    Sal great link! Those shoes look like Dorothy’s red shoes transformed for the Wicked Witch of Alaska! I’m going right out to get those gems and have little Obama faces painted on them!

  15. cker says:

    I have one thing to say – The devil wears Prada! Need I say more?

  16. susie_bubble says:

    I was hating all this talk of Obama’s pig comment…. I just ended up feeling bad for the name of pigs…must it be sullied in this way!

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