How Much Less Could You Not Care?

back_to_the_future-poster

It just occurred to me that too many people online are mentioning Back To The Future. Maybe they’re making a sequel or prequel.

I actually love the term origin story, which I just learned this week. I love it because it’s stupid and pretentious and somehow millennial.  It’s the new way to say prequel as if that term wasn’t hard enough to get used to.

Anyway, Back To The Future was a great film at the time and my kid adored it. We saw it several times.

Now it is 2015 and I could not give a shit about Back To The Future on any level. I don’t care what the original cast is doing or what the remake or prequel or origin story is about. I’ve been done with it for years and years.

Likewise Star Wars. Could not care less. Literally. But too bad for me, because I am doomed to hear about it forever and ever. If I could not have to see the words Carrie Fisher even, I would consider it a small gift from the universe.

I’m through hearing about rape culture or anything remotely related to it. I get it, but I still don’t care. I’m through hearing about how Jennifer Lawrence didn’t get enough money. “Women in Hollywood,” I’m through hearing about your problems. I just don’t care.

Are you finding that your culture is obsessed with stuff you could not care less about? Even if it has gone viral (or especially if it has gone viral?)

Let me know what it is. Please share!

But just one more thing before I forget: How much do you not care about what happened on the Jimmy Fallon show last night? Why do we have to hear about it? Wouldn’t we have watched it when it was on, if we gave a shit about it? I don’t watch it expressly for the purpose of not knowing what was on it!

Christ!

Okay, now you.

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13 Responses to How Much Less Could You Not Care?

  1. Miranda says:

    You’re extraordinary. So, I am now a ‘Godammit, I’m Mad!’ angel.

  2. caro says:

    Celebrities as aspirational, lifestyle “brands.”

    Such as: Julia Roberts giving her guide to serenity and bliss in one of my dumb magazines this month. I know it’s not exactly zeitgeist-y or viral, but her blissed-out, big-laughing exterior seems to hide a deeply contemptuous and mean spirited interior.
    Can’t stand her.

    I guess the whole belief system that somehow we should look up to these dumb broads and their “brands.” After a whole life time of buying into it I’m suddenly utterly sick of being expected to look up to celebrities and stars. fuck them. What do they know about anything?

    Yeah, not exactly an answer to your question!

  3. Dj says:

    Thank you sister. Why do people give two shits about any of this ridiculous cultural phenomenon? Americans have so devolved into a bunch of babbling 13 year olds, it’s scary. Celebrity worship has become so part of our juvenile culture. What’s happening with this celeb, that famous person etc etc. why?
    The bloated salaries, egos and lifestyles of the celebrity culture makes me want to puke. All horrible, toxic.

  4. David Duff says:

    Dear Sis, you will not be surprised to learn that I inhabit a different universe to yours. I suffer (if that is quite the word) with the very opposite of your condition.

    My life is completely devoid of ‘sleb’ recognition! Honestly! I occasionally glimpse the TV screen and see various ‘humanoids’ posing and pouting and acknowledging the cheers and applause of the crowds; or I open a newspaper and see huge half-page photos of glistening, glossy people; or my friends (‘And yes, I have a few, and then again, too few to mention’ – sorry, Frank!) become quite animated over this or that ‘sleb’ and their latest doings, but the sad/happy (you choose) fact is that I haven’t the remotest idea who any of them are!

    Oh alright, yes, I recognise David Beckham because he was a terrific ‘footie’ player but that’s about it. And alright, yes again, I am now, after saturation coverage, just beginning to recognise Mrs. George Clooney but only, I think, because she appears to be the only brunette ‘sleb’ in a universe full of boring blondes. To begin with, I was confused because I assumed she was advertising “War on Want” or some other charity attempting to aid the half-starved.

    That last sentence, by the way, Sis, will give you a tiny clue as to why I am so attracted to you. Don’t ever change your colour or the whole thing is off! (And yes, you’re right, it’s time for my meds!)

  5. David Duff says:

    Ooops, I should have taken my meds before pressing the ‘Send’ button. My last paragraph referred to my penultimate sentence. It’ll be the usual hundred lines, I suppose?

  6. Richard says:

    Amen, sister! I sick of it all. I’m over “social media”. Everyone has to have a “brand”. Have you been to a club lately? Everyone is texting. In gay bars the guys are on Grindr. It’s a bar full of guys standing there looking at their “smart” phones.

  7. Bevitron says:

    I don’t even know what has gone viral to not care about. I used to try to actually keep up, then tried to act like I was keeping up, then was unable to keep up that much up. Now I worry that I don’t care about not knowing. It’s like crossing some border into Entering Clueless Territory, No More Information This Century, No Turning Back.

    Are all nighttime TV show hosts named Jimmy?

  8. David Duff says:

    @ Bevitron:

    I think it’s called ‘advancing towards old age’, Bevitron. True, it has its drawbacks but also some marvelous advantages.

  9. Gina says:

    I don’t want to Keep up with the Kardashians. Not at all. I’m of the obsession with these twits. I don’t care about any of the Real Housewives. I’d be more interested in a reality show that follows a single mother through her day — and I don’t mean that Kate Plus 8 woman either. The Duggers. The Duck-ers (those duck call guys). Mr. & Mrs. Clooney. Jimmy Fallon, Saturday Night Live, The View, etc. None of it matters. The entire Fox News team. Before and after photos of celebrities who have dieted, worked out, or had plastic surgery. Nope. Not interested — even in the most subtle and/or freakish extremes. The entire programming lineup of the CW.

    I know there’s more, but I will with stop there.

  10. Suspended says:

    I care for very little of popular culture….possibly because I’m getting old and dismissive or that the “celebrities” got a whole lot less interesting. I’m cool with that. Actually, growing up we weren’t force fed all this gossipy shite. People had dignity. You knew very little about a “stars” personal life and that kept things more alluring. Less is more.

    Richard – I know?? What is with all these people who are not in the moment? I hate going out to dinner and seeing whole groups of friends/families all just sitting on their phones, zero conversation, unless it revolves around a picture or video on a phone. It’s ridiculous and terrifying! Sit the fucking thing down! Dinner only takes an hour.

    Sorry, you touched on a major pet peeve.

  11. Suspended says:

    Oh, and fuck “Back to the Future Day.” What a stupid concept.

  12. Dj says:

    I still don’t get that movie…

  13. Madam Restora says:

    I couldn’t give a toss about poor whining, moderately talented celebrities complaining about their lack of privacy. If they want privacy they can give back their $40 million (sixth) house in the south of France (Ang), their Lamborginis, yachts and other people’s babies and go get a job as a bank jocky and a lovely two bedroom flat to rent. No one is going to bother them then. There’s no such thing as a free lunch people!

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