The Broken Dryer: A Poll

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Here’s the situation:

Tonight, my ex-husband came over to visit and offered to wash a fluffy foot-thing. (Don’t ask, but the tag says it’s washable.) I offered to wash it but he insisted on doing it. He probably thought he’d do a better job. (Men.)

Then, he put it in the clothes dryer, which is in the garage, because that’s where we do the laundry. He came back inside for a while and then went out to check the dryer. He came in again to report that the dryer stopped working. It worked when he turned it on, but now it’s broken. Dead. Won’t go on again.

I said something like, Shit, you broke the dryer?! He said something like, No, I didn’t break it, it broke.

I said, Well, my husband will be heartbroken when he comes home from work at 2: A.M. and finds that the dryer is broken. (My husband has been graciously doing the laundry while I have the fucking walker and can’t carry anything.)

This is like an episode of Curb Your Enthusiasm, but without Larry David.

I told the ex to pay for a repairman. The ex was aghast, and furious. Because “he didn’t break it.” But it wasn’t broken before he used it. In my addled mind, HE SHOULD PAY FOR THE REPAIR. Not only that, we have no money. (I’m aware that this has no moral bearing on the issue, but still.)

Should the ex pay? Or not?

Posted in Disorders, Rants | Tagged , , | 44 Comments

The Tavi Problem

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It’s taken me a long time to gather my courage to address the Tavi Problem.   As her celebrity increases, I keep wondering why nobody brings up the subject of autism.

Aspergers Syndrome is a condition on the autistic spectrum, often characterized by a high IQ and an intense preoccupation with a specialized field of interest. In children, Aspergers can be especially endearing. A young person animated by a passion for learning, even if it’s about vacuum cleaners, is a pleasure to be around. As the mom of a kid who attends a special needs school, I’ve come to recognize signs of Aspergers from a mile off, and I’ve come to appreciate the quirky brainy kids that my son hangs out with.

Tavi strikes me as a kid with Aspergers whose obsession dovetails perfectly with the zeitgeist, i.e. the burgeoning influence of bloggers and the fashion industry’s desperation to appear ‘fresh’ and appeal to new markets.   Her extraordinary knowledge of fashion is mind boggling and she clearly has a prodigious memory for details. Gregory Evans has a similar understanding of vacuum cleaners, a gift that has earned him some notoriety but unfortunately not the same outpouring of love that Tavi has received.

Here is what Rodarte sister Kate Mulleavy says of Tavi: “When spending time with Tavi, I am always astonished by her observations. Tavi is a writer in every sense. Her way of interacting with the world comes from a sensitivity and madness that belongs to poets and bank robbers.”

My goodness! Poets and bank robbers?! I worry that Tavi is the Flavor of the Month, and that when the fashion world grows tired of her it will be a difficult transition. I hope her parents know what they’re doing.

My purpose in this discussion is not to diminish Tavi’s achievement but to suggest that using the term Aspergers Syndrome or even autism would help to dispel the notion that those on the spectrum are retarded or stupid. It would encourage other gifted kids to pursue their interests, full steam ahead.

I’m prepared to be scolded for daring to label everyone’s little darling, who is only thirteen. But it’s a label I use with affection and admiration. I’d like to see more kids and adults identify themselves as being on the spectrum. I’d like to see the end of the stigma that persists. As for the Rodarte sisters, I’m pretty sure they have Aspergers too.

Posted in Celebrities, Fashion, Words | Tagged , , | 84 Comments

Almost Prada, And Yet…

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At first glance, the Obscene Boot by Jeffrey Campbell looks like an almost acceptable knock-off of those stupid thigh high garter boots by Prada. But then….

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the horror of the side view! Jesus! This kind of thing could cause a cardiac arrest.

Somewhere, there’s a fashion blog with a photo of these boots and a caption saying “Love! Must have.”

Posted in Fashion, Horrible Stuff | Tagged , | 27 Comments

The Saddest Shoes in the World

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These shoes make me want to cry.   They look like a pre-school project. Which is usually a good thing. But not when they cost $1,605.

How long before those cheap little rhinestones start to fall off? If shoes can feel embarrassed, this one is dying inside.

Posted in Fashion, Rants | Tagged , | 44 Comments

Let Me Count the Ways, Mrs. P

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How do I hate thee… how could anyone not hate thee?

This reliance on Trig as a crowd pleaser during Mrs. P’s book tour is driving me nuts with helpless rage. Even though the baby is so clearly a prop, her shameless Trigsploitation has struck a chord with the gullible right ring. This is the sort of thing they’re observing:

“She’s going out there as a pro-life woman to say that there’s great joy in special-needs kids – and that we shouldn’t be aborting them.”

Christian conservatives write that “Mother and son have become objects of the left’s unrelenting scorn” and that this reflects “a broader societal bias against disability.”

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So now, if you don’t like Mrs. Palin, you’re not only a godless commie, YOU HATE THE DISABLED! You abortionist!

Has anyone   else in politics ever dragged around a special needs kid like this? It seems like some sort of new low. I don’t like the way Trig’s shoes and eye-glasses are optional accessories. I don’t like the way she holds him up like a fisherman showing off a prize winning bass.

I know plenty of moms of special needs kids, and none of them act like they deserve to be president based on their children’s disability. I’ve said it before and I’m compelled to keep saying it. What a fucking cunt! 

** Oooh and by the way, Ann wins the Dead Sweater, Dewayne gets it if Ann declines due to a secret sex tape.

Posted in Rants, Religion, Words | Tagged , , | 26 Comments

Comments for Jane 12-01-2009

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By now, you’ve seen the pictures of Sea of Shoes at the ball. My sister pointed out that Sea’s dress was the only one with sleeves! I’m not sure if that’s the case, but it’s a good observation anyway.

As a public service, I invite you to leave your comment to Jane, since she won’t publish them herself.

I will begin:

OMG Jane, you look like a turtle in this photo! It’s good to see that you need to be photographed from a “good” angle, just like everyone else! Hate the dress but glad you had fun. Love, SW

Posted in Fashion, Words | Tagged , , | 49 Comments

Styling is Everything

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Whenever I get email updates from Pixie Market, I dutifully click to see their new arrivals, and inevitably I am horrified. It’s not the items they sell, but how they are put together.   Why would anyone want any of the garments in the pictures above?

Let’s say I wanted a floppy white sweater. After seeing it as part of this horrible ensemble, ugh, forget it! Why the dead animal boots and the stupid hat?

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Look at this Pixie Market girl. I can’t remember which item is supposed to be on display…the jacket, maybe?…but the horrible styling just repels me. Is the stylist blind or is she having a little private laugh?

More and more, I’m aware that it’s the styling I respond to, not the product.   The styling is everything; it promotes a fantasy you want to buy into, if it succeeds. If it fails, as in Pixie Market, there’s almost no way you’ll spend your money.

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Here’s some trousers I’ve been ogling for weeks.   Don’t worry, I’m broke. But I’m drawn to the trousers because of the elegant no-nonsense styling. This girl says to me, “If you buy these trousers, you’ll be a young Lauren Bacall, so carefree that your shirt cuffs won’t even match! You’ll be sloppy but pulled together! You’ll get to wear your men’s shoes but still exude confident femininity!”

This brand, Hope, really knows what they’re doing.   Whereas the Pixie Market people, I’m not getting their message unless it’s “Buy this stuff if you wanna look not only unsophisticated but also blind and crazy!”

Posted in Fashion, Rants | Tagged , , | 38 Comments

“The Cool Thing About God”

I’m sorry, I just can’t enough of this crazy bitch!   She’s so full of shit when she talks about her “faith!.”   Please enjoy.

Posted in Disorders, News, Religion | Tagged , , | 17 Comments

Stuff You Need: Another SW Fundraiser

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Okay, you know the drill.   Here is a chance to buy something from Sister Wolf’s Hoarded Fashion Collection .

Funds must be raised. So here is a vintage charm necklace by Kenneth Jay Lane, an original from the late 70s and not one of his newer copies of his earlier designs. The chain is 24 inches long and the longest charm is 4 inches long.

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It is awesome, as you can see. $120 plus $5 shipping in the US.

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Yes, my arms are veiny, eoow, try to focus on the beautiful cuff by Tulla Booth, an artist and photographer who made some jewelry in the 80s. This cuff is gold-dipped and set with real stones. 2 1/2 inches wide and best for a slim wrist. Signed on the inside. $120 plus $5 shipping in the US.

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Antique turqoise earrings set in 14k gold. They are really stunning and unusual. I need some fucking money. $70 plus $5 shipping in the US.

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This beautiful Chanel handbag is STILL available and is an amazing bargain. Check out prices on eBay or in any magazine. See more photos here. $600 plus $25 shipping (includes insurance.)

Reward yourself or a loved one for Christmas! Contact: sisterwolf666@gmail.com to purchase, via paypal or whatever.

Please don’t leave comments about how you wish you had the money, UNLESS YOU WANT ME TO KILL YOU or UNLESS YOU ARE WENDY B, who is compelled to do anything you forbid her from doing.

xo

Posted in Art, Fashion | Tagged , , | 11 Comments

Stop and Laugh at Mrs. Palin

Times are hard but there is joy if you look for it.   Spend a moment with Andrew Halcro…..

Posted in revenge, Words | Tagged , , | 20 Comments