Category Archives: Celebrities

Jessica Simpson, Boo Hoo

Breaking news: Jessica Simpson is a fat pig and it’s mean to make fun of her. In fact, if you make fun of her, you are part of the problem. It’s people like you who are forcing girls to starve … Continue reading

Posted in Celebrities, Disorders | Tagged , , | 20 Comments

Golden Globes 2009 Exegesis

Since some people have actual lives, I am once again providing a summary of the   Golden Globes Awards, having sat through most of it in a stupor when I wasn’t busy peeing or getting snacks. It was a pretty dull … Continue reading

Posted in Celebrities, News | Tagged , , | 16 Comments

Outing John Travolta

I’ve been meaning to write about this for a long time, but I guess I wasn’t mad enough. John Travolta should have been outed, and not for being gay. His insistence that his son Jett, now dead at 16, wasn’t … Continue reading

Posted in Celebrities, Disorders, Horrible Stuff, News | Tagged , , | 28 Comments

The Eating Issue

Last week, it was Oprah. Now, it’s Rachel Zoe. Oprah has gone public with her weight gain, revealing that she’s addicted to food.   I certainly sympathize with Oprah; I feel that inside the Slim Me, is a Fat me, who … Continue reading

Posted in Celebrities, Disorders | Tagged , , | 21 Comments

Poor Jennifer Aniston!

Dear Jen, I know you want some positive attention, and posing naked is always good for that. But here’s the problem, and I say it with all due respect: Your chin is the deal-breaker. Your nose came out great, especially … Continue reading

Posted in Celebrities, Words | Tagged , , | 41 Comments

Pop Culture Quiz

For the last few days, I’ve had the feeling that there’s nothing interesting on the Internet. Anywhere. For me, as an addict, this is pretty scary. How much fashion, YouTube, politics or gossip can anyone stand? How many weird medical … Continue reading

Posted in Celebrities, Disorders, Fashion | Tagged , , | 19 Comments

Madonna Finally Delivers!

Dear Madge, I’ve always hated you but for once you’ve made me happy.   First, because while posing for a picture of my big biker boots, I realize that I’m five years older than you and I never exercise. Ha ha, … Continue reading

Posted in Celebrities, News | Tagged , , | 39 Comments

New Reviews of Movies I Haven’t Seen [updated w/ gerbil]

My Best Friend’s Girl This is a godawful romantic comedy that grates on the nerves and delivers another worthless performance by Kate Hudson in the role of a smiley airhead/vixen. Dane Cook is predictably repellent as the wise-cracking love-interest. The … Continue reading

Posted in Celebrities, Horrible Stuff | Tagged , , , | 44 Comments

Skulls, Fur, and Gwyneth Paltrow

Look at these amazing little purses by Natalie Brilli. Gazing at them, I completely forgot that I’m sick of skulls. I would hate to have to choose between them. In fact, I need everything she’s ever designed, even the black … Continue reading

Posted in Art, Celebrities, Fashion | Tagged , , | 25 Comments

John Mayer, Thy Name is Douche

I know that in the grand scheme of things, celebrities don’t matter, but once in a while they intrude upon my thoughts and sicken me more than a hideous display of fringed boots at Nordstrom. John Mayer is not just … Continue reading

Posted in Celebrities, Horrible Stuff | Tagged , , | 25 Comments