He who Hesitates is Skirtless

Posted on August 12, 2011 by Sister Wolf

This dramatic and frightening Thakoon “bustle skirt” greeted me at Shopbop this morning, only to disappear by midnight. What the fuck?!   Did it turn back into a pumpkin, or did it sell out in one day? You need to see the back view to imagine the effect you might have had, sweeping into a room or tripping and falling as the case may be.

I believe it is taffeta, and the price was around $2,000 I think.

What is the point of it? All I could think of to wear with it was a  basket  of fruit on the head. Maybe it’s a wry tribute to the mullet!

Well, now that it’s gone, I feel a vague sense of loss.

So let me tempt you with another great new “piece” from Shopbop:

They are sheer silk chiffon layered with matching shorts.   They would also look nice with some fruit on the head.   I like the way these gossamer pants are styled with clunky leather boots. It’s an aggressive statement that says, “I am a visionary, you know nothing!”   They are a steal at only $225.

Posted in Fashion | Tagged , | 26 Comments

Art in the Street: A Hipster Lament

Posted on August 8, 2011 by Sister Wolf

Today we went to the Museum of Contemporary Art to see an exhibit of graffiti and street art. Little did I know it was The Place to Be, with a long line of hipsters waiting to get inside the museum.   My husband and I thought “Fuck this” and decided to leave , just as we saw my adopted son Chris and his girlfriend Ada walking toward us.

It was wonderful to realize that we crypto-hipsters all gravitate to the same places. Ada became a museum member to help us avoid the long line for non-members.   The guy who helped her had 14 piercings in his face.

The exhibit was crawling with people who could each qualify as a piece of graffiti art. The was no air inside, where the temperature hovered near boiling point. Everyone was madly taking pictures of the art and each other. You had to dodge the  iPhone  flashes as you tried to avoid screwing up someone’s photo op.

I complained to my husband in a non-stop whine, but he’s learned to live with this. I objected aloud to a wall of Shepard Fairy crap, noting “Shepard Fairey is a fucking punk!” and thereby quoting my own self. I loved the cars and some black and white photos of Chicano homies. But most of it seemed boring and outdated, like break-dancing only less dimensional. Shuffling along the narrow passages between makeshift rooms, I felt like a character in “Hi, Mom.”

I wondered what would happen if someone broke out a can of spray pain and graffiti’d the graffiti.

Out in the street, an even longer line of hipters stood sweltering. I said to my husband: Haha, look at them. We walked to a Yogurtland, where a pretty girl sitting next to me blabbed about her reality show and insisted to her morbidly obese friend that what she really wanted to do was “make art.”

Posted in Art, Rants | Tagged , | 24 Comments

Ask a Man

Posted on August 7, 2011 by Sister Wolf

One of the exciting new features you can look forward to here will be the convenience of A Man to answer your questions regarding male behavior. The feature will be called Ask a Man, and written by my friend Romeo, who is not only male but has served in our armed forces, drives a truck and currently brandishes a forbidding mohawk.

Romeo has always shown a willingness, however reluctant, to answer all my questions and now he will answer yours, too.

Here are the ones that bother me most, or let’s just say they mystify me the most:

When two men greet each other with a handshake, how do they know which kind of handshake to use? If it’s the fist on top of fist, how do they know whose fist goes on top? How do they know whether it’s going to be just an ordinary handshake or a special Bro Shake? What is the signal?

My second question is, why are men so fucking touchy? They can’t take any direct criticism, obviously, but anything that might remotely be construed as some kind of criticism makes them get testy. While they love to open sentences with “You ought to try…” or “Why do you always…” it is strictly verboten to address a man like that unless you want him to snap at you or sulk for an hour. Why are they so thin-skinned??

While I await Romeo’s lucid explanation of these mysteries, feel free to submit your own question for him in the comments. I am looking at this coming Friday as the launch date for Ask a Man.

Posted in News, Words | Tagged , , | 18 Comments

Godwin’s Law

Posted on August 5, 2011 by Sister Wolf

Godwin’s law (also known as  Godwin’s Rule of Nazi Analogies or  Godwin’s Law of Nazi Analogies) is a humorous observation made by  Mike Godwin in 1990 that has become an  Internet adage. It states: “As an online discussion grows longer, the probability of a comparison involving Nazis or Hitler  approaches   100% .”  In other words, Godwin put forth the hyperbolic observation that, given enough time, in  any online discussion–regardless of topic or scope–someone inevitably criticizes some point made in the discussion by comparing it to beliefs held by Hitler and the Nazis. –   Wikipedia

~

I love this. This is the type of discovery that brings joy to my heart.

The definition continues:

Godwin’s law is often cited in online discussions as a deterrent against the use of arguments in the widespread  Reductio ad Hitlerum form.   – Wikipedia

“Reductio ad Hitlerum” ?!?!

I fucking love language.   In fact, I made up a good word the other day:   Whateverism.   It’s the modern malaise, basically, and I’m against it.   Please feel free to bandy this word about, if you’re not comfortable with Reductio ad Hitlerum.

Posted in Art, Words | Tagged , , | 11 Comments

Googling Yourself

Posted on August 4, 2011 by Sister Wolf

Yesterday, I made the stupid decision to google “Sister Wolf.”

It’s weird to see yourself as others see you. I’m used to interacting with strangers on my own territory but finding yourself being discussed elsewhere is the equivalent of hearing what people say behind your back. And naturally, they want to talk shit about you.

I was so pleased to find several people who loved my blog! But the pleasure gave way to annoyance when I came across a website devoted to criticizing bloggers. There was even a forum for the critics to chat among themselves, but I didn’t read it. It was enough to find some people dismissing me as crazy, with one commenter even noting disgustedly that I should be getting grief therapy instead of blogging.

It has never even  occurred  to me that people might disapprove of my grief.  And I never think of myself as crazy, or even weird. I think the critics were upset that I outed a troll, and that’s something I’ve thought about a lot. Upon reflection, I’d do it again, because that’s the only way to effect a consequence for cowards who want to hide behind anonymity.

Well, you can’t please everyone, right?   It’s better to not google yourself. It’s the one instance where ignorance actually is bliss.

But then, I was buying my kid a wallet at Ross Dress for Less, when a sales assistant asked me if I was aware of their Every Tuesday Discount for seniors. Sure enough, my reflexes are so slow that I didn’t slap her in the face for suggesting that I am a senior. She went on to explain that it’s for people “55 and older.”

I glared at her and said something like, Okay, I’ll take the discount but you’re not supposed to think I’m 55 or older. She smiled back, sweetly and blankly. What a fucking cunt! ™

God, it’s so awful how you can’t control people. I’ll never get used to it. But I can write to Ross Dress for Less and complain about this assault on my self-esteem. It might be fun to try to get them to apologize. I could even call it grief therapy!

Good idea or not?

Posted in Disorders, grief, Rants | Tagged , , | 30 Comments

Which Shoe Makes You Sadder?

Posted on July 29, 2011 by Sister Wolf

“Not just a sandal–a work of art, a thing of beauty. This Brian Atwood sandal boasts wild leopard print, ribbons that lace up your ankle, and feathers that sway with every step.”    $1,450 Neiman Marcus

“Not just a shoe–an object of desire, a work of art. This Diego Dolcini satin showcases fan-pleated chiffon, articulated with two-tone elegance and discerning crystal embellishments.”   $2,445   Neiman Marcus

Can’t decide?

Here’s a close-up of the discerning crystal embellishments. (Can they be discerning? Why not  judgmental, while we’re at it?)

And here’s the Thing of Beauty, walking back into the jungle….

Posted in Fashion | Tagged , | 46 Comments

Houseboys for August

Posted on July 29, 2011 by Sister Wolf

I don’t know where you live, but Los Angeles is hot and sweaty in August. I need a Houseboy to fan me while I sip a cold drink. Jo Dong Hyuk looks like a highly accomplished Houseboy, don’t you think?

But look at Greg Kheel.

Greg seems like a versatile Houseboy who wouldn’t mind dressing up if the situation demands. In fact, I would be happy to let him raid my closet when he’s done with his chores.

Finally, there’s Renato Ferreira.

He’s young, sure, but I think he would bring a spirituality to his tasks. He can even wear the necklace if it  doesn’t  get in the way.

See anything you like?

*If you know of any worthy houseboys of this caliber, feel free to submit pictures to sisterwolf666@gmail.com and I can include  them  with  the next batch.

Posted in Art, Houseboys | Tagged , | 22 Comments

Bad-Girl Style

Posted on July 29, 2011 by Sister Wolf

An article in the New York Times offers an affectionate tribute to Amy Winhouse’s style, giving her credit for creating a unique look based on several Bad-Girl templates.

The article reminded me of how many girls still try to imitate Bettie Page. There are millions of clones out there with dyed black bangs and deep red lipstick, all going for the same trampy   rockabilly look. With all due respect, it’s a look I’m really sick of.   I think it should be saved for Halloween or costume parties.

The article also led me to the work of Karlheinz Weinberger, a Swiss photographer whose pictures of sleazy hooligans and teenage delinquents made him famous among artists and intelligentsia. Looking at his work, I finally undertand the aesthetic that Gnarlitude Jen and her ilk are so infatuated with.

Biker  paraphernalia, big messy hair, tough sullen expressions, it’s all there in Weinberger’s old photos. It’s a look that I personally affected when I was around twelve years old, trying to copy the tough Mexican gang girls who represented rebellion. By fourteen, though, I was over it.

Today, the only way to be a style rebel would be to dress inconspicuously.

Still, I’m happy to remember Amy as an original force in style as well as music. Her mixture of   50s and 60s influences, punk, pin-up, tough, girlie, retro and rapper, added up to something fresh, defiant and  irresistible.

God bless her, and all bad girls everywhere.

Posted in Art, Fashion, love | Tagged , , | 8 Comments

Let’s Just be Mad

Posted on July 27, 2011 by Sister Wolf

“Filming began Tuesday on “Oz: The Great and Powerful,” the star-studded new-spin prequel to “The Wizard of Oz,”  in Michigan, Disney announced. James Franco takes the lead as the young pre-Wizard, a magician who finds himself cast off into Oz. There he meets a sparkling group of sister witches — both good and bad — in Rachel Weisz  as Evanora, Michelle Williams as Glinda and  Mila Kunis as Theodora, and alongside his assistant,  played by Zach Braff, he finds himself further and further immersed into the magical land.”

Fuckers!!!!

Intensify your disgust by reading the studio press release.

Posted in Horrible Stuff, News | Tagged , , , | 19 Comments

Goodbye to Amy

Posted on July 24, 2011 by Sister Wolf

My poor darling Amy. I didn’t expect you to die, even if everyone else did. I expected you to get clean and sober, somehow. I expected you to live and I wanted you to live even if you never made another record.

Your voice moved me so deeply, its astonishing mature beauty and soul were even more amazing when I saw that it was housed in such a tiny young body.

I’m so sorry that you had to hurt that body. I know you only wanted to block out the pain you lived with. It must have been a terrible struggle to stick around for as long as you did.

I’ve always sneered at the idea of an Old Soul but now I accept it. I believe it means that you suffered from the beginning, from some burden you did nothing to deserve. I believe that you were more than a mess or a cautionary tale or a member of some stupid 27 Club. I believe that you were and will always be a holy soul.

I know your father will torture himself for leaving you alone, thinking that he might have saved you if he were holding your hand at the  crucial moment.   I’m so sorry that they took you away with no one there to kiss you goodbye.

I’m so sorry you’re gone.

Posted in Uncategorized | 40 Comments