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Yearly Archives: 2009
Go Away, You Awful Teenagers
Still under the influence of bad hair, I was informed by KOS of an online fashion mag whose editor is 15 years old. Sure enough, it’s all about high-priced ‘avant garde’ designers and models whose hands are THIS CLOSE to … Continue reading
A Bad Hair Day
When I’m not happy with my hair, nothing else matters. I am acutely fixated on the not-goodness of my hair. I tried lightening it to a brown color, forgetting how stubborn my hair is about staying black. It is now … Continue reading
The Good, Bad & Ugly Round-up
Mmmmm, now this is a jacket I’d touch my face for! Why does it have to be $500? Brian Lichtenberg, can’t you please give me one for free, after all I’ve been through? Check out this abomination: “Punk Pants” by … Continue reading
Manolo Has Jumped the Shark*
What can one say about this atrocity, which features genuine ocelot fur? Although, now that I look some more, I can see J Lo wearing these, can’t you? *This is the last time I will use Jumped the Shark. From … Continue reading
But She Does Look Slutty!
Listen to Mrs. Palin’s reaction to David Letterman’s joke about her buying make-up at Bloomingdale’s to update her “slutty flight-attendant look.” Oh, Mrs. P, he didn’t mean Bloomingdale’s literally! Now I’m wondering if she’s even capable of finding her way … Continue reading
The Curse of the Topshop Jacket
I saw this jacket late at night when I was, ahem, on my sleeping medication. It took me nearly thirty minutes of struggling with Topshop’s login system to make the purchase. At several points during the procedure, I asked my … Continue reading
Knock-off Shoes: Yes or No?
Seeing these Jeffrey Campbell shoes for $118 made me recall in sickening detail my quest for these shoes, below, by Acne. I think I paid around $450 for the Acne shoes, which I found at Opening Ceremony, a store that … Continue reading
Posted in Disorders, Fashion
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Word Fever
According to some website called Global Language Monitor, the English language will add its millionth word sometime on Wednesday. I’m predicting it will be a stupid one. Other language experts think it’s impossible to count the number of words in … Continue reading
Both Ugly AND Versatile!
“A skirt and leggings in one, these acid-wash leggings feature a ruched miniskirt overlay and slash detail at legs.” YES! The Shopbop copywriter is back on her game!
Mr. Michigan: True Fiction
At the time, he was my physical ideal, the embodiment of my perfect fantasy. When I noticed him at the gym, my heart lurched. He was the image of Conan the Barbarian, but his flat baby face was much sweeter. … Continue reading
Posted in Disorders, Words
12 Comments