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Category Archives: News
God Save the Queen
I can’t understand anti-monarchist sentiments, when the Queen of England has given us all so much pleasure. I first fell for her in 1982, when some guy broke into her bedroom at Buckingham Palace, and she calmly spoke to him … Continue reading
Crazy Mothers Club III
Sylvia Plath was a crazy mother, but what should we make of her son’s suicide? We know that depression runs in families, but most of us manage to hang on, even if our mothers were crazy. Maybe when a family … Continue reading
The Lourdes Project II
Remember when we all admired her unibrow and moustache? Lourdes has evidently succumbed to either societal pressure or her mother’s obsession with beauty procedures. Here they are arriving in Malawi to purchase a new child. Six months ago, Lourdes was … Continue reading
My Fat Ass!
I was very pleased to hear that poor Megan McCain told that bitch Laura Ingraham to kiss her fat ass! I thought about it as I trudged through a shitload of ‘Obey’ products on Karmaloop while checking our the new … Continue reading
Special Olympics Fuss
Oh god, President Obama made a joke comparing his bowling ineptitude to the Special Olympics. Big deal! Now we have to hear everyone talking shit about it, not only people like Mrs. Palin but normal people, too! This sanctimonious PC … Continue reading
Fritzl Trial: Quote of the Day
Nutcase Joseph Fritzl is finally on trial for rape, incest, murder and enslavement, but his lawyer insists that Fritzl is no monster. Lawyer Rudolph Mayer insists that his client was only trying to create a second family when he locked … Continue reading
Operation Bristol Palin
Even though Mrs. Palin has an Agenda against me (see above) I am big-hearted enough to want to help Bristol, who is innocent of sin, mostly. According to reports, Bristol and Levi have split up, and it isn’t pretty. His … Continue reading
Thank God, I Hate It!
What a relief to find some fur on the runway that I don’t want. These two numbers by Givenchy are repulsive, aren’t they? I’m sure Madonna will show up in one, so I’m already bracing myself. The one on the … Continue reading
Academy Awards 2009 Exigesis
I don’t know about you, but I loved this year’s show. It’s the first one in years that wasn’t a grim chore to sit through. Hugh “I’m not gay” Jackman was a delightful host, relieving one from the effort of … Continue reading
Travis the Chimp: R.I.P.
Whenever chimps go on a rampage, nobody wins. Poor Travis the Chimp was shot to death by a policeman after attacking a friend of his lifelong owner. But that’s not the whole story. Earlier in the day, Travis annoyed his … Continue reading