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Category Archives: Rants
Jennifer Lopez: What a Fucking Cunt!™
J Lo is sorry about going to Turkmenistan to sing for its dictator, President Gurbanguly Berdymukhamedov. Her “people” had “vetted” the event, but they missed the part about its human rights record. All you have to do is google ‘Turkmenistan … Continue reading
Gwyneth, Enough Already!
I know it’s not very interesting to hate Gwyneth, but how can one ignore her this week? It’s like she WILL NOT REST until every single person on earth detests her. Is her work done yet? If not, we’re getting … Continue reading
Guilty!
After days of watching death and mayhem in real time on TV, I have a question: Aren’t the owners of the disastrous Texas fertilizer plant every bit as guilty as a terrorist bomber? “West Fertilizer Co is a retail facility that blends fertilizer … Continue reading
Dana Loesch: What a Fucking Cunt!™
Watching right-wing psychopath Dana Loesch shouting down Van Jones and Piers Morgan on the issue of gun control tonight, I nearly had a stroke. My husband finally snapped, “If you can’t stand it, turn it off.” It was probably good … Continue reading
I Can’t Tell You Why
For the last two nights, we have been watching a new documentary about the Eagles. I have tested my husband’s patience by repeatedly asking “Which one is that?” I still can’t tell them apart. I always thought Don Henley was … Continue reading
Sandy Hook Happy Meal
When I told [a family member] that 26 kids from Sandy Hook elementary school were going to sing at the Super Bowl, he was surprised and disgusted. I asked rhetorically why the survivors from the Aurora movie theater hadn’t been … Continue reading
The Ex Revisited
Twenty years on, I am still rattled by my husband’s fucking ex. Not only has she opened a tiki-themed restaurant too close to my neighborhood, she has recently written the following: “There was a time in my youth, those long … Continue reading
Homeland
I’ve finally caught up with Homeland, after skipping the first season in a private protest against Claire Danes as a CIA agent. Now I’m cool with Claire, but Brody’s wife is a major irritant. Whenever the wife is onscreen, I find … Continue reading
Mr. Know-it-all
I had lunch today at an Indian restaurant where my friend and I were regaled by the wisdom of a guy I’ll call Mr. Know-it-all. Mr. Know-it-all (see above) is one of those guys who knows everything. And I mean … Continue reading
Paul Ryan: What a Fucking Cunt™!
Oh, snap! After insisting that his obsession with Ayn Rand is an “urban legend,” a tape has surfaced in which Ryan gushes about Ayn Rand’s philosophy: “It’s inspired me so much that it’s required reading in my office for all … Continue reading