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Category Archives: Words
Butt Masks: Please Kill Me Already
When I saw an ad on Sephora online for a “Booty Mask“, I was excited by discovering a new avenue of ridicule. Haha, I thought, how absurd, a beauty mask JUST FOR YOUR BUTT! I’m still amazed by the aisles … Continue reading
Pronoun Problems, Solved
If you’ve spend any time thinking about gender and pronouns, go and read what I wrote here, and get back to me with your thoughts, arguments, and insults! xo
Why Are They Torturing Me? Part 2
When I think about the internet and how it has distorted the reality of day to day life, first I think about social media. Nothing matters unless it can be documented, or liked. Every few hours, a gigantic wave of … Continue reading
Why Are They Torturing Me? Part 1
Sometimes I go looking for trouble but other times it assaults me when I’m doing what I call Minding My Own Business. These fucking boots are in the second category. I was scrolling through the new arrivals at farfetch.com when … Continue reading
International Women’s Day: Canceled
I’ve been thinking how stupid it is to have an International Women’s Day, but I didn’t know how to approach my feelings without seeming reflexively contrarian. Women are great, but no greater than non-women. International women are great but so … Continue reading
I, Monster
A few days ago, I was at the mall, drinking coffee and talking to a young woman I will call Mary. Mary had started the conversation, which I was enjoying, because who else wants to talk to me? She was … Continue reading
Let’s Say You Can’t Stand Beyonce
People who have criticized Beyonce have been subjected to the wrath of her fans and the loss of their jobs. Some have endured death threats. It is clearly not acceptable to dislike Beyonce, lest the Beyhive come after you or … Continue reading
Banned Words and People for 2019
What a horrible year, right? Why can’t Trump just die so we can let the refugees have a nice soft bed and a hot meal? Meanwhile, we’re not totally helpless. We can complain about words and word usage. We can … Continue reading
Glamping: The Stupidest Thing Ever™
To launch this new category, The Stupidest Thing Ever™, I’m going with “glamping“, a concept that comes with its own stupid word. “Glamping” is a portmanteau of glamorous and camping and describes a style of camping with amenities and, in … Continue reading
Posted in irritants, Rants, Words
Tagged awful people, coffee, Stupid fucking idiots, travel
9 Comments
Adulteress: Part Three
What is love? Don’t ask me. I can’t define it, but like Supreme Court Justice Potter Stewart, I know it when I see it. When The Tragedy wrote back that he now wished he had said he loved me, I … Continue reading
Posted in Disorders, love, Words
14 Comments